Loss of Childhood Friends

Last week I lost my childhood friend, She passed away... but imagine that the pain that I am feeling could very much be compared to your daughter's pain. Not being able to see them when you want to, and really not understanding why. I like the advice that RoseKitty wrote. Like your daughter, I am going to immerse myself into other things, not to forget, but to grow over the pain so I can eventually be able to think of my friend and not hurt so bad. I bet there is another little girl out there that is just like your daughter that needs a friend. I know with your schedule it's hard to just drop stuff and go out, but with technology today, maybe she can find someone she can facetime or skype with! Give her a hug from me and let her know that her friend probably misses her just as bad.

I wish i could help, but other than making arrangements with the mom of this friend for your daughter to plan special fun dates for future days, i would try to take her other places where other kids are around her age and who she knows..like school functions or a library story time..

Oh dear - this is so sad and I do not have any answers. I just hope that they can meet occasionally to keep the friendship alive.I am so sorry.

I wish that I had a good answer for you, but unfortunately I do not. It sounds like you are doing everything you can to not only help her deal with the distance and loss but also make the transition as painless as possible by setting up play dates to reinforce the fact that it might not be the same as it was but it does not have to be completely gone, either. My daughter has a close friend that is autistic, and it was difficult for both of them at first when they were not in the same class, because he always wanted to play with her and have her attention when he saw her, and she made new friends that she also wanted to play with but she still wanted to play with him as well. Fortunately, we are friends with his parents, so it made the whole thing easier, especially with the play dates and including him in things so that he felt more comfortable around the other children and eventually made more friends. Being a parent is really difficult, because we want our children to grow and flourish, but we also want to protect them from all the pain and dangers in life. I think that I feel it more deeply when someone hurts my child than when someone hurts me, and I would gladly take all her pain if it meant she didn't have to feel it, and I suspect you feel the same way.

My little son has a friend who is autistic - and the friend always wanted my son around - which of course isn't always possible. The mother told me when he finds that one friend, he just wants to play with that one friend. Well, the mother had some group playdates where a bunch of kids would be there - sometimes we would be there, sometimes we were not. Eventually he got used to not playing with just my son - that there are others he could play with when my son was not there.

I can relate to this story. I don't understand my friend why she use to stay away with me and dwell to the faraway land.

Probably the only thing you can do is help her foster friendships with others who are still here. I know nothing can replace that first good friend, though.