Should I start dating
By Kevin
@kevin1877uk (36988)
October 13, 2015 2:09pm CST
Should I start dating
If you have read back through me posts you know that it’s not too long ago since I had relationship break up from my partner. We both lived in different counties, long story so I won’t go on.
I’m often feeling very lonely and in need of some adult company. I don’t like dating websites and I don’t know anyone here in Plymouth, UK Maybe I should join a club and get to know people. I’m also thinking that it may be too soon to start dating, just wanting someone to be with.
Should I start dating? Maybe that for me to decide if I’m ready or not to start dating. How soon after a relationship break up have you waited to start dating? Over the years, it’s been months in not years before I have. Maybe I shouldn't go looking for love and let love find me.
13 people like this
19 responses
@TiarasOceanView (70022)
• United States
13 Oct 15
Hi Kev. I know you have been through quite a big deal lately.
If you feel ready, then go for it.
4 people like this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
13 Oct 15
Thank you Roz, I'm not totally sure, but it would be nice to have someone in my life.
2 people like this
@TiarasOceanView (70022)
• United States
13 Oct 15
@kevin1877uk I wish you could.
2 people like this
@sherryeb (580)
• Duncan, Arizona
13 Oct 15
Dating can be what you want it to be, a relationship, a friendship or just companionship. I say get back in the game!
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
13 Oct 15
Lol thank you Sherrye I will just need that push I guess although feeling unsure about it all.
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
14 Oct 15
Thank you, I'll try and follow my heart, but last I did and it end not good for me, coming back to the UK to nothing.
1 person likes this
@Juliaacv (51458)
• Canada
14 Oct 15
@kevin1877uk I know, there are never guarantees with life, but wouldn't you rather explore your possibilities as opposed to growing old as a lonely person always wondering what if.......Hearts were made to heal, try it.
1 person likes this
@Jessicalynnt (50523)
• Centralia, Missouri
14 Oct 15
I think if you meet someone you like enough to want too sure, but just to fill a social void? No. Now find some groups or clubs, or reading groups, or knitting groups, or anything to get out and make some friends? sure!
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
14 Oct 15
Thank you, knitting groups sounds fun but I doubt there is one. I love photography and maybe find a group or I could join a running club, do like running/jogging.
1 person likes this
@PainsOnSlate (21852)
• Canada
16 Oct 15
I've been married to the same guy (happily) for almost 50 years so I'm no help. I will say your old partner is the reason I and many others left your web site. Do you still have it? If so I may come back.
@kevin1877uk (36988)
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16 Oct 15
The website is still there/going, it's undated and everything. Good place to share your photography work, I'll probably stay single for a time. Being with someone for 50 years is awesome, well done, my parents were together for 42 before my mom pasted away.
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
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17 Oct 15
@PainsOnSlate Ok, hope to see you there on the site.
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
14 Oct 15
Thank you, I guess that's life and nothing I could do about it all which is the saddest part of it all really.
@Blondie2222 (28611)
• United States
14 Oct 15
That choice is up to you. Start going out and make new friends so you can know people around you. Just go with what your heart says.
1 person likes this
@artemeis (4194)
• China
14 Oct 15
I don't suppose there's anything wrong about having company after a breakup and one can be totally in love without going through the stages. So, there's really no issue and the need for further consideration as far as having a casual company over some drinks, meals or even a party.
1 person likes this
@artemeis (4194)
• China
15 Oct 15
@kevin1877uk I think the only issue you need to address would be if you are jumping into the relationship out of other reasons other than looking for someone to love. I'm sure you are aware what is a rebound relationship, which is a distraction than a real relationship. Also, you will find that instead of allowing your new partner be who she really is, you try to impose, expecting your new partner to make up for the shortcomings and mistakes of the old partner.
In a relationship, one of traits that makes it work is being responsible and as such, you will need to constantly reflect if you're on a rebound or in a true relationship which is founded on love - to do good to the other, lookout for the other, wants the best for the other and does not spare an effort to recollect back a favor or sacrifice.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
14 Oct 15
I've not had many relationships so I'm really no expert on breaking up. I've really only ever had 1 big break up in my life. I had been with that guy for a year. It was a difficult break up, and it took me a few months to move on. After that I met my husband and have been with him 14 years. But I feel like if you're lonely you might as well start looking. Perhaps focusing on a new relationship is just what you need to get over the last one. Just try to get out more and see what happens.
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
14 Oct 15
Same here not had many relationship, and I will find dating hard to do, never do it before.
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
14 Oct 15
I will follow my heart, did last time and look what happened there. Meeting someone in a different country, moving, then having to return 2 years later to nothing.
1 person likes this
@jkct02 (2874)
• Kota Kinabalu, Malaysia
15 Oct 15
@kevin1877uk
It just did not work out, the decision was not wrong. I believe that love is something that will come naturally if you do not resist it consciously.
@Cdjran2015 (273)
• Manila, Philippines
14 Oct 15
Well to answer your question, you must try.
Breaking up is opening to a new life. It's part of life and it make us strong. Don't think too much just learn to find a good woman who can stick with you through thick and thin.
Date me hahahha joke.
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
14 Oct 15
I will although I know it will be hard for me, I think, but I will given time.
@JaneApril (334)
• Philippines
13 Oct 15
You shouldn't start dating just because you're feeling lonely and you feel like you need to. If you are feeling lonely, why not just go out or hang out with friends or family.
Do not rush things. Resume dating when your heart is ready and stable.
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
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13 Oct 15
@JaneApril I agree I need to join a club or something and make friends.
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
13 Oct 15
I don't have any friends in Plymouth, or many friends all together. I will I thought I see what people would say, I don't think I'm ready, although I know I need someone in my life.
@JaneApril (334)
• Philippines
13 Oct 15
@kevin1877uk
Engage yourself in other worthful activities. Dating when you're not ready might not help you feel better.
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (100526)
• India
13 Oct 15
If you have even considered this question, then I believe you are ready to move on. As somebody suggested, dating can be for many reasons. You can check whether it is friendship you need or more. I say go ahead. Life is too short to be spent doubting at every step. All the best. :)
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
13 Oct 15
Thank you, yes life is too short far too short.
1 person likes this
@cherigucchi (14876)
• Philippines
14 Oct 15
If you are ready for another relationship, why not?
1 person likes this
@kevin1877uk (36988)
•
14 Oct 15
I agree, just not totally sure about it all, so maybe I'm not ready.
@WillowHolmes (46)
•
14 Oct 15
If you feel ready to then yes, of course start dating and meeting new people. There's no need to feel embarrassed or insecure about groups, dating sites etc because they're full of like-minded individuals. Aim to go at a pace you're comfortable with but be open minded about it changing, because you never know what you'll find.
Relationships are fantastic things, I hope you find what you're looking for :)
1 person likes this
@Missmwngi (12915)
• Nairobi, Kenya
13 Oct 15
Well that a decision you have to make yourself. Maybe you should not be quick to do it but you can start by making friends
1 person likes this