Do You Love Your Child Any Less as They Become Adults?
@Cintronwriter (564)
United States
March 30, 2016 8:02am CST
I am a father to twins and it is by the best title I've ever worn. It is earned not by application but bestowed upon me as a gift, a gift I knew nothing about until my kids were born.
To know this love as deep and profound, I'd gladly relive the day they were born many times over, but as with life and its relentless pursuit of balancing the world, I no longer live with them, and so I'm relegated to weekly and bi-weekly visits.
Tell me, what fond memories keep coming back to you about your child (ren), and does the love you had for them as a child, continue as they become adults?
5 people like this
9 responses
@bobbyjoe143 (1287)
•
30 Mar 16
I cherish many memories of my eldest son, especially how loving and kind he was as a child, he still is both of those things, but now as an adult. You see I had my son when I was 18, and this year he himself will be turning 18 in August.
I love him no less now than I did when he was a baby, he is to me and always will be MY baby :) I am proud of his every achievement, sad for his every loss. I am there for him now as I always was and always will be to my last breath, he is now and always will be my world.
There aren't actually enough words in the English language to describe my feelings of love for my son and how wonderful he is to me.
Now, so many years later, I have the chance to do it all again as I have had 2 more lovely little boys who will be turning 1 and 2 very soon.
Not only will you love your twins just as much as they get older, but you'll find that love actually grows day by day, and not only that, if you are lucky, they will also become your most cherished friends as my eldest son has to me :D
3 people like this
@Cintronwriter (564)
• United States
31 Mar 16
Wow, such an awesome response! I can actually feel your emotions come through your writing, and now you get to experience it all over.
The limited time I have with my kids is time I hold near and dear. When I see them after a week away from them, they cling to me as much as I cling to them. I find myself staring at them as they play at the park and can't help but join them when they ask me to play with them.
I love them so much like you said, words to describe such feeling is futile. It's music to my ears hearing others tell me they love if a child never wanes but strengthens.
1 person likes this
@bobbyjoe143 (1287)
•
31 Mar 16
@Cintronwriter It is such a massive sadness that you can't see your children as often as you'd like, I spent short amounts of time away from my son when he was small (he used to go on holiday with my parents and things like that). I would hug him for dear life when he got back and missed him terribly when he was away. He still lives at home, but I know the day will come when he decides it's time to leave the nest. That day is one I feel I dread, but I know it must come. So I can only imagine what it is that you go through when you're not with them. I hope in time, as they get older they want to spend longer amounts of time with you and that their mum allows it. Good luck and keep on loving those kids like no tomorrow! xx
1 person likes this
@bobbyjoe143 (1287)
•
31 Mar 16
@Cintronwriter My eldest son's father was not interested in having a relationship with him after he was born, and so he didn't have him in his life at all. When he turned 11, I had finally found his dad through the medium of facebook and contacted him. He and my son met a few times, but yet again, he faded off into the distance. Fortunately my son has had a life full of love and affection and thinks very little of or about his father. Your children are lucky to have such a loving a considerate dad.
Given the choice, I would have had my sons father involved as much as possible from the day of his birth, as that is my way... but I know not all mothers are the same once separated from the fathers of their children.
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
30 Mar 16
I'm so sorry that you don't live with your children any more, that must be heartbreaking.
The answer to your question is that I love them every bit as much no matter how old they are. They are still my children. I would literally give my life for them.
2 people like this
@Cintronwriter (564)
• United States
31 Mar 16
Yes, thank you. I'm glad to hear the love doesn't wane but grows.
1 person likes this
@irishidid (8687)
• United States
30 Mar 16
Of course you love them when they become adults! Love for your children is unconditional and they will always be your babies.
There may be times you will not be happy with decisions they make but you will always love them.
2 people like this
@Cintronwriter (564)
• United States
31 Mar 16
I should clarify further, the intensity of love for them as they become adults, will it grow more than what it is now?
@sdmoonchild (731)
• United States
31 Mar 16
I love both of my daughters more and more as they get older. My oldest is 28 and my youngest is 25. You don't realize how fast time goes by when they are adults. I just received some news that my oldest daughter is moving back home from another state where she lived for 8 years. I am so happy even though the circumstances for her are not but she has no family where she is now and I feel friends can not support her emotionally the way family can.
1 person likes this
@Cintronwriter (564)
• United States
31 Mar 16
It's comforting to know the immense love I have for my babies strengthens over time. I heard my dad say the same thing but one never knows if he's telling for the truth or only telling me what I want to hear.
I'm sorry about your daughter, hopefully she acclimates back home quickly. Sometime moving far away puts in perspective how much value family and friends are. Better for you now that she's coming home right?
@DWDavis (25805)
• United States
30 Mar 16
I cannot imagine the longing you feel those days you cannot be with your children.
My sons are both grown now, 24 and 20 this year. The oldest is an Air Force officer and the youngest is a research student. While our relationship has changed, my love for them is just as strong as it ever was. I still celebrate their accomplishments today as much as I did when they were youngsters, with the same parental pride. And I still feel just as protective.
1 person likes this
@DWDavis (25805)
• United States
31 Mar 16
@Cintronwriter We still hug, and they still let their mom kiss their cheeks.
@Cintronwriter (564)
• United States
31 Mar 16
Thanks, and I'm glad you maintain that bond with your boys. Do they not allow you to treat them like your boys, e.g. they don't want you hugging or kissing them?
1 person likes this
@Cintronwriter (564)
• United States
31 Mar 16
Yes, my move is temporary. As they grow older and play sports and involve in activities, I will be closer to them. It's in their young age that keeps me away from them as I'm beholden to their mother's schedule.
@Dextoi (1845)
• Philippines
31 Mar 16
@Cintronwriter I see... that's a relief.. Kudos! A very responsible dad indeed!
@Cintronwriter (564)
• United States
31 Mar 16
That's great to see the love your parents have for you. Maybe when you have children, you'll ponder on that question. Have you ever asked your parents heartfelt questions that you always desired to know?
@epiffanie (11326)
• Australia
31 Mar 16
You sound like a wonderful father! congratulations .. but I felt a pinch in the chest when I read the part that you no longer live with them..I hope you get to spend more time with your twins... if not, I hope you make an effort to call them everyday .. just to make them feel that you are always around no matter how far you are ..
I have three grown up children and I think of them as "the beautiful extension of my life" .. My love for my children is the same as the day they were born.. It is a great privilege indeed to become parents ...I'm very grateful for the experience ..
1 person likes this
@Cintronwriter (564)
• United States
31 Mar 16
Thank you for the kind words. They're 4 so I'm at the mercy of their mom. She is bitter, still, a year and a half later, so when I text her to check on the kids, she doesn't respond. I'm left to communicating with them once a week, and it's tough.
Im hoping as they grow older, I'll be able to talk and/or video chat with them everyday, but I think I'll have to buy them their phones, an added expense to the child support I give their mother.
Growing up in a divorced home myself, my goal is to be visible and present in their lives, no matter what I have to do.
@Ruby3881 (1963)
• Canada
31 Mar 16
I have four teens and tweens. My oldest is now old enough to vote, and I find that I love her even more deeply as she gets older. The more they mature, and the more their individual personalities emerge, the easier it is to appreciate them.
