i don't belong here

April 19, 2016 3:02am CST
Have you ever been so perplexed by the world around you that you begin to imagine the stork took a wrong turn and delivered you to the wrong parents/time/universe? I find the world utterly bewildering. No, this is incorrect. I 'get' the world. It's natural, fluid, uncontrollable and bizarrely beautiful. It's wild, untameable, unfathomable and secretive. It knows what it knows, and it's happy to share this, despite our own views on it. It's people I find utterly bewildering. Sometimes. There is the possibility that when I was nothing but a few cells, as yet unknown, floating along the tunnel of my Mumsy's fallopian tube, there was a slight mix up. Maybe God, or the gods, or the experimental scientist, or the aliens, or whoever, nature, whatever, was dishing out the characteristics and qualities that would form the basis of Me, they gave me too much compassion. I received too much niceness and too much see the good in everybody. I swim against the tide on many issues. Other people become enraged, whilst I see mental illness or loss of hope or a failed support system. Other people spout vitriolic wordage about things of which they know little; it's somewhat necessary that they join in with the campaign to belittle and maliciously misinform, to agree just to fit in. 'Off with their heads!' they scream, as I sit back and wonder why people are so quick to jump on the bandwagon, to judge other people based on fifth, sixth, seventh hand knowledge. This isn't to say that I'm never gossipy or not-nice. Of course I am, and anyone who suggests they're not is a big fat fibber. But I refuse to kowtow to other people. I'm not going to say one thing when I feel and think another. I won't let other people twist my words to suit their own agenda. {this is just a feeble rant, which sounded better when in my head.}
7 people like this
7 responses
• Valdosta, Georgia
19 Apr 16
I think I have too much of the same things you do. See the good in people, trust the world, help everyone you can, etc... And this was a great discussion by the way. =)
3 people like this
• Valdosta, Georgia
20 Apr 16
@Poppylicious We have so much compassion for the world and that could never be a bad thing! The world in fact needs more people like you and I. I don't think there's anything wrong with it. We will be hurt more emotionally than others but so be it. We are good people.
1 person likes this
19 Apr 16
Thank you. I always feel that I'm supposed to feel bad for giving people a chance and seeing the good in everyone. I genuinely believe that everybody has good points. Even the most evil people in history had people who loved them for their good points.
2 people like this
@gudheart (12659)
19 Apr 16
I often feel like I was not made for this world. I still feel that way to be honest.
2 people like this
20 Apr 16
I wonder if most of us feel that way, but some don't talk about it or even realise. We are weird, as a species.
• Finland
20 Apr 16
I feel same way. I also feel like I might be going crazy. Then time to time I find it in my heart to love other humans around me but then they upset me and then I just curse their names again and turn into a furry rabbit who refuses to be any relation for humans.
1 person likes this
20 Apr 16
@Varjokani We are all furry rabbits. :D
1 person likes this
@jaboUK (64354)
• United Kingdom
19 Apr 16
There's nothing wrong in trying to see the best in people, I do that myself. I've been called naive for it, but I don't think anyone can have too much compassion. You sound like a nice person (yes, you do). This is a well written post, well done.
2 people like this
20 Apr 16
Thank you. I often actually feel naïve because I'm so convinced I must be wrong when everybody else is looking at a situation in a different way.
1 person likes this
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
19 Apr 16
You might be reincarnated and missing the older world you were in. I often miss the past from my first life, because it was really different from the world or today. Of course, that's mainly because of the person I loved. You never get over your first love, even if it was hundreds of lives ago!
1 person likes this
@OneOfMany (12150)
• United States
20 Apr 16
@Poppylicious A lot of people don't believe in it, but I know many including myself that are reincarnations. Of course, when telling that to someone that doesn't believe that they make a point to tell you otherwise very quickly! I have seen animals that were reincarnations of other animals (dog to dog), talked to people that told me details about previous lives and how they were happen to have a chance to be another person. And so on. Maybe you took a detour through heaven. It's only a resting point (or it was supposed to be) and people do come back here at times. Maybe you are missing the sense of peace and the structure of that world because it's only instability here. :)
1 person likes this
20 Apr 16
@OneOfMany If there are more people alive right now than have ever existed in history, how can reincarnation be real? We can't all have been the same person. With reincarnation are we still the same person, but tweaked slightly to fit in genetically with our current family? Can I be a cat in my next life? So many questions!
1 person likes this
20 Apr 16
But I don't believe in reincarnation ... I like the theory though. It feels like something is missing so maybe it is, only the thing I'm missing is completely unknown to me because it's from another life entirely. Hmmm ...
1 person likes this
@xFiacre (13188)
• Ireland
19 Apr 16
@poppylicious And here's me thinking I'm the only sane person in the world!
2 people like this
19 Apr 16
You're not sane! You drink Earl Grey!
2 people like this
• Canada
19 Apr 16
The first thing that came to my mind when I saw the title was the Radiohead song where he says "I don't belong here"-when I was a kid, that was a thought that occured to me often, at first because I really felt as if I had no self worth. But in another sense, if it seems like there is something about the world that is less then it should be...or could be...well, that's really a very rational thought which even ancient writers have thought. But in some sense, well, whether we belong here or not...here we are:)! For some reason that thought, it seemed to almost hit me with a kind of force, that some part of me which was different, actually had meaning and relevance. What I mean is...you say you have too much niceness or compassion? I don't see that as a bad thing...not in this world which seems to lack it, right? So...you being here, would be a good thing for the world, I would think:)? And if some in the world lacked this...well, maybe they would see some of that niceness, or experience it and...well, then your too much niceness would spread to those who had a little less:)?
2 people like this
19 Apr 16
Oh my gosh, you're amazing! Absolutely. Unfortunately my niceness is often just in my head because of my shy, introverted, anxious and clumsy characteristics, so it doesn't always get seen so as to be an example to others. Maybe I should attempt to spread my wings a little and display a more confident niceness. :)
1 person likes this
• Canada
19 Apr 16
@Poppylicious thank you:)! And huh, you know what? Shy and introverted, that's not a bad thing because it often means that one thinks deeply about things-that's something else the world needs too:). Very badly infact:/. In some real way, there are characteristics which people have that they sometimes think are weaknesses, but in the long run, they could be very powerful assets-some of the greatest minds and those who have impacted much, began in such a manner...these are good things:).
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Apr 16
i've pondered that very thing myself. thinkin' perhaps i was born centuries too late 's the complications'f this world (the human part) make me wanna jest climb'nder a rock 'n hide. i'm glad that'cha think fer yerself. seems there's folks out there who'd jest's soon be those cute lil robots who conform to whate'er the media/politicians/celebs're sellin'.
1 person likes this
19 Apr 16
If it wasn't for the fact that social media helps me with my introversion and willingness to participate in the world, I think I'd have been far happier in a more simple time. If you have room under that rock, can I hide with you?!
1 person likes this
• United States
19 Apr 16
@Poppylicious :D i reckon we're here fer purty much the same reason then. yes ma'am, yer more'n welcome to come'n hide'n that rock with me. big hugs!
1 person likes this
20 Apr 16
@crazyhorseladycx Awww, thank you!
1 person likes this