Have I Wasted My Years With That Foreigner BF?
@cacay1 (83505)
Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
February 4, 2017 9:37pm CST
I was 27 when I met Dennis through Filipino Cupid a dating site, then after 3 months he came to my home and I introduced him to my family. He occupied one vacant room at home. During that visit he was not yet my boyfriend. I accepted his courtship after one year. I toured his country and stayed with my cousins. I have there 6 cousins already residents as hired skilled workers, engineers and nurses. One married from there and others married with the same nationality ,Ph.Before left my country , he told me about marriage , but after series of visits there, I sensed him always in blue, then he told me no more marriage to happen.
That was the time he learned he has skin cancer.He was operated twice of that sickness. Then Parkinson's Disease attacked him with some complications and one is his kidney, blood pressure and urethra. He never had stable health again after all these sicknesses and those which he told me late.He did not like me to be sad and worried.
We been in a relationship for 9 years, and I am now 36 years old, no more chance to have a family of my own. How I really dreamed to have two children in my life that I have wasted.
You can never blame me if I have this kind of regret. Life is not kind to me, and all it's me to blame. All I do now is live within my existence and force to be happy with my lovely nieces and nephews at home and abroad. Thank you friends for the sympathy of my fate.
Image photo my own taken 4 years ago.
24 people like this
30 responses
If you only see my tears fall because of your comforting and encouraging words, then you might hear me thanking you. Thank you so much my friend, I do follow your words of advise.
@marguicha (223101)
• Chile
5 Feb 17
I don´t really know what would I do in your case. But my youngest daughter her her last child when she was 44 as she is a wonderful and intelligent child.
3 people like this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
5 Feb 17
@marguicha I am not in great state this time, I want to hide in the mountains. Thanks my dear for your comforting words.
1 person likes this
@infatuatedbby (94914)
• United States
5 Feb 17
I am sorry to hear. I hope all the best. There are other options like surrogacy but it will be expensive.
2 people like this
@infatuatedbby (94914)
• United States
6 Feb 17
@cacay1 It is but you won't be one to carry - but very expensive.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
6 Feb 17
@infatuatedbby, That is true expensive but I do not like it. I want my won flesh .Thanks dear.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
12 Feb 17
@infatuatedbby ,It is hard to deal chuld not your own,lol.
1 person likes this
@smileyhema (4606)
• United States
5 Feb 17
That's very sad to hear my friend .. but don't lose hope. We just have one life and let you not waste that. I suggest you to wait before taking any decision. As of now, you would be in great shock and hence whatever you decide will go in vain. Take your time, may be couple of days more and understand your life. Think if you can chose another partner who will comfort you from all these sorrow. It will take sometime but worth waiting. You can also check with any Gynaecologist to see if you will have any complication for late pregnancy. I'm sure there is nothing like that with the advent of new technology..
Hugs and wishes for your other side of life. Don't worry.. relax and take it forward.
2 people like this
@smileyhema (4606)
• United States
6 Feb 17
@cacay1 - that's the good spirit .. I'm sure you will recoop from this soon with this mindset.. hugs
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
6 Feb 17
@smileyhema,Yes friend, hard to deal but because of you and all my heart becomes stronger again to rise again where I fall, thank you so much.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
8 Feb 17
@smileyhema , Thank you so much my friend, you all inspire me and make me strong.
@DianneN (247186)
• United States
5 Feb 17
Your years were not wasted if Dennis brought you happiness. You are by no means over the hill. I hope you find true love again, and I'm sure you will. You can have a baby or two. There are many tests, so no worries. Just be happy and enjoy life!
2 people like this
@snowy22315 (180817)
• United States
5 Feb 17
Sorry to hear that, I know what it is to live with regrets.
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
5 Feb 17
@snowy22315, Thanks snowy, yes hard for we cannot bring back yesterday.
@Linda1234 (4712)
• Houston, Texas
5 Feb 17
I hope you happy . Every one wishes you have a good life .
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
5 Feb 17
@Linda1234 Thank you too.
1 person likes this
@Peterwu111 (121)
•
5 Feb 17
oh, man, that guy ruined your life why did he hide the info? but on the other side, owning a family also has problems, just adjust your attitude , please always see the bright side of everything, thank you for your sharing
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
5 Feb 17
@Peterwu111, yeah, I thought he is the man of my dream and destiny, wrong.Thanks for comforting me, very much liked.
@GegeTheMechanic (1060)
• Finland
5 Feb 17
Sorry to hear what happened to you. Have you thought of adopting a baby since you think it's too late to get your own? I know it's not the same than being pregnant and experience all that
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
5 Feb 17
@GegeTheMechanic Not in mind to adopt, I want my own. It is hard to deal an adopted baby we never know his / her blood line.
@jainaproudmoore (457)
•
5 Feb 17
It:s a bittersweet life experience. Maybe he didn't want you to be lonely that's why he kind of broke up with you. He must have loved you that much. But on a brighter side, you were able to make the most of those times that you were together. It must have been blissful when you were together.
Don't worry, life always has something good in store for you.
Cheers!
2 people like this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
5 Feb 17
@jainaproudmoore, Thanks for the consoling words, very much appreciated my friend.
1 person likes this
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36850)
• Pamplona, Spain
5 Feb 17
Tops is right. You can still have Children you are not out of age range. A sixty year old Doctor had a baby girl last year born perfectly. So come on cheer up you can do it still.
Not a wasted life either as you have been with him loviing him for 9 years you are very young to think that you cannot have Children at all.
1 person likes this
@lovinangelsinstead21 (36850)
• Pamplona, Spain
6 Feb 17
@cacay1
We would be delighted to see your future children here too. So go Girl Go.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
8 Feb 17
@lovinangelsinstead21 , Yes, I will be too delighted should that happen. You all inspire me,Thanks friend.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
6 Feb 17
@lovinangelsinstead21 You inspire me all here, you are all bright and nice Mylotters. Thanks dear.
1 person likes this
@CookieMonster46 (13454)
• United States
6 Feb 17
you have plenty of time, never feel you wasted time, everything we do , everyone we meet is just part of the chapter in life. You had good times right? it just didn't work out the way you had hoped... keep looking
1 person likes this
@CookieMonster46 (13454)
• United States
7 Feb 17
@cacay1 Seriously there are many looking for a good woman as there are women looking for a good man. hang in there.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
8 Feb 17
@CookieMonster46 , Yes there are, but I do not know if the man is real .
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
6 Feb 17
@CookieMonster46 , Very strong words, thanks dear for inspiring me more.
1 person likes this
@ridingbet (66854)
• Philippines
6 Feb 17
i am so sorry, my friend. you love him still,right? if you won't marry him, then i think you have to find a new love, and be with him. i think having a LDR is good but when health is at stake here, i guess you have to let go (he might not want that you worry about him) and find a new love
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
8 Feb 17
@ridingbet , Yes freind, I have to move on, thank
you so much my dear.
you so much my dear.1 person likes this
@ridingbet (66854)
• Philippines
7 Feb 17
@cacay1 yes that is so true. especially if you part ways with health reasons, and not a third party. i think it is good to move on when you think you separated with no third party involved.
@sunrisefan (28524)
• Philippines
8 Feb 17
Some people say "when the door is closed, God opens a window". I'm sure God has other better plans for you, Ms. Erly.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
9 Feb 17
@sunrisefan Thank you friend for inspiring me. you are indeed a man with a lovely heart.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
12 Feb 17
@sunrisefan Thanks my friend. There are many nice people here and no one can bet them, you , me and all.
1 person likes this
@sunrisefan (28524)
• Philippines
9 Feb 17
@cacay1 You're welcome, Ms. Erly. It's not only me but I see many people giving their piece to lift you up. It only means you have lots of friends here.
1 person likes this
@Happy2BeMe (99380)
• Canada
5 Feb 17
I would not look at it as wasted years. You loved Denis and he made you happy. You have stood by him through his illnesses because you loved each other. Things would have been different if he had never gotten sick. You have a big, beautiful heart so don't live with regret. Be thankful for those 9 years you had together.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
8 Feb 17
@Happy2BeMe , That is true, what I am facing now makes me weak . My days are not anymore as colored as before. I hope I can surpass this frustration.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
6 Feb 17
@Happy2BeMeSo nice words strong and impressive, thanks dear you insure me more this time.
1 person likes this
@Happy2BeMe (99380)
• Canada
6 Feb 17
@cacay1 You are welcome. I know you are dealing with so much right now. Your thoughts and emotions are going to be all over the place. Stay strong. 
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
5 Feb 17
@TheInvisibleMan Thanks friend, but it cannot be done instantly.
1 person likes this
@cacay1 (83505)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
5 Feb 17
@TheInvisibleMan Actually, it could be done instantly but love will not be felt.
1 person likes this
@TheInvisibleMan (17597)
•
5 Feb 17
@cacay1 I didn't say that. Just take the advice. 
1 person likes this
