In a Discussion it's not About Who's Right or Who's Wrong
By josefina
@josie_ (10034)
Philippines
June 12, 2017 9:02pm CST
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."
~ Voltaire
Many members avoid posting discussions and/or making comments on controversial topics. For good reasons.
Issues in politics and religion are the most sensitive since it would be a subject that intrudes into personal beliefs. When a discussion becomes intense, emotions often flare up leading to unreasonable behavior. Civility be damn and personal attacks that have no bearing on the subject matter are thrown at each other.
This is unfortunate and goes against what Mylot is all about. A community where diverse beliefs and opinions are express freely in the marketplace of ideas.
I like discussing and arguing about debatable subjects. It is an opportunity to get different perspective and broaden understanding of the issues in question.
However, there are people who wear their beliefs on their sleeve. They post discussions and dare others to prove them wrong.
Although I enjoy lighthearted stories about day to day life, some serious discussions adds spice to the mix. But I must thread softly least I unknowingly step on a landmine of explosive irrationality inside a "provocateur's" discussion waiting for a victim.
Do you avoid discussions about sensitive and controversial topics?
Have you ever unwittingly walk into a nest of vipers and got stung by the verbal abuse of an opinionated, myopic and close-minded member?
Photo Image: Pixabay
15 people like this
19 responses
@ridingbet (66854)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
i want to shy away from politics and most of all, religion. when i have a topic, a personal one, to discuss, i accept any criticism, but not to the extent of challenging me and commenting against what is done or what i believe in.
i had an experience with a user, not a Filipino, who did not accept my explanation, and i was the one who posted the discussion. i had to get rude to this user, pointing out that question "haven't you read my discussion?"
3 people like this
@ridingbet (66854)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@josie_ precisely, that is why i made that harsh comment because the user was getting into my nerves; the user wanted to stick to his/her point of view even though i already stated the facts. it was good the user did not respond anymore.
2 people like this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@ridingbet _Maybe you got into the user's nerves.
2 people like this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@ridingbet _It's seldom we have to resort to harsher response since most members follow a code of behavior when interacting with others. In cases where it is obvious that further discussion is futile because we don't agree, I would stop commenting any further
1 person likes this
@allknowing (136433)
• India
13 Jun 17
I have taken myLot to be a place where I can truly relax and if I see someone rubbing me the wrong way I avoid those people and this may include controversial topics, sadly.
2 people like this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@allknowing _That's one way of avoiding conflict with fellow members. After all we're here to enjoy and have a rewarding experience.
2 people like this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
21 Jun 17
Can't say that avoiding certain topics would be my thing. We have probably all be in a situation where we wish those speaking would just go away....far, far away @josie_
1 person likes this
@PatZAnthony (14749)
• Charlotte, North Carolina
22 Jun 17
@josie_ Some seem to have an agenda and are going to continue on a subject until their last breath.
1 person likes this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
22 Jun 17
@PatZAnthony _You're so right. It's not the topics we should avoid but the people who are unwilling to keep an open mind on the opinions of others.
2 people like this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
22 Jun 17
@PatZAnthony _As long as the discussion is kept civil and focus on the subject I am fine with continuing the dialog.
@LadyDuck (471506)
• Switzerland
13 Jun 17
I avoid sensitive discussions because several times I have found very rude those who write them. They do not accept a different opinion and become very aggressive if you try to defend a different opinion or idea. I know that there are users with whom I can discuss everything. Now I know which users to avoid. Very narrow minded and convinced that what they say is right.
2 people like this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@LadyDuck _I think the best way to judge whether a person will be offended easily by the difference of your opinions is to gauge the level of their sense of humor. Someone like me won't be easily offended by the "slings and arrows" of outrageous comments.I simply respond with the kitchen sink of logic and rationality to knock some senses into their head.
3 people like this
@moirai (2853)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
Do I avoid controversial discussions? Hmm...
Maybe, maybe not. Can't remember exactly. 
But depending on what topic it is, I might avoid it, or I might not.
Am I confusing? Hehe.
I am one of those who also like to hear many sides of a story, many points of view of a topic, and I also like to say my opinion. I might try to respectfully point out any flaws I see about the other person's point of view, but if they are firm on their stand, I have no desire to change their minds. Agree to disagree, I say. 
One of the important things is to stay civil and respectful. Don't call the ones who don't share your opinion as an idiot or whatever.
But depending on what topic it is, I might avoid it, or I might not.
Am I confusing? Hehe.
I am one of those who also like to hear many sides of a story, many points of view of a topic, and I also like to say my opinion. I might try to respectfully point out any flaws I see about the other person's point of view, but if they are firm on their stand, I have no desire to change their minds. Agree to disagree, I say.
One of the important things is to stay civil and respectful. Don't call the ones who don't share your opinion as an idiot or whatever.1 person likes this
And lol! But noooo,.. I wouldn't do that either. That's pretty much the same thing to me. @josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@moirai _The start of your comment can become controversial. As for calling anyone an idiot for not sharing my opinion, I never stoop to that level but rather raise up to the occasion with some backhand complement on their intelligence.
I might say, "Do you know your intelligence is at the level of Donald Trump?
As for calling anyone an idiot for not sharing my opinion, I never stoop to that level but rather raise up to the occasion with some backhand complement on their intelligence. I might say, "Do you know your intelligence is at the level of Donald Trump?
@crazyhorseladycx (39509)
• United States
13 Jun 17
guilty 'f the latter 's i've done such several times (unknowin'ly). i ought to learn to avoid such 't my age, eh?
1 person likes this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@crazyhorseladycx _Assuming you meant real snakes living in farm lands and not in mylot.
1 person likes this
@luispas (1674)
• Venezuela
13 Jun 17
I love to hear people's opinion as much as I love to give mine. I think that's the way we grow, learning from others, understanding that we're not alone and there's bunch of people out there who can think anything (almost) and they'll be right.
1 person likes this
@gimitchelray (244)
•
14 Jun 17
Yes, this is the case on Facebook which is why I rarely use it anymore because all they do anymore is fight over politics and religion. They don't discuss it, its literally "I'm right, you're wrong" and then it turns into name calling etc. Etc. When my father was alive though I found it funny to bring those two subjects up because it was always hours of ranting and talking about his beliefs, I never planned on getting away from his house until late lol.
1 person likes this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
14 Jun 17
@gimitchelray _It would have been preferable if during my youth my father subjected me to long hours of conversation about politics and religion instead of "what are you going to do about your future" one way conversations.
1 person likes this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
14 Jun 17
@gimitchelray _As a parent I did that too. Now that I'm a grandparent, I spoil my grandchildren rotten.
@gimitchelray (244)
•
14 Jun 17
@josie_ oh yes I am familiar with that also lol my father would always lecture me on what I could be doing with my life because I was "smarter than I acted". I think maybe parents sometimes just put to much faith in their children lol but I guess they are suppose to do that.
1 person likes this
@prashu228 (37524)
• India
13 Jun 17
If course there are lots of sensitive issues which needs to be handle with Care, they may break relations..if not handled properly
1 person likes this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@prashu228 _Discussion will always invite disagreement and conflicting views. As long as all the participants conduct themselves in the proper manner. The discussion will be successful.
@Srbageldog (7716)
• United States
13 Jun 17
In general, I try to avoid talking about politics or religion, or other controversial matters. I have gotten into heated arguments about these things with people on social media before, and have had friendships end over it. I do like reading other people's viewpoints on matters, but I prefer to keep my opinion to myself because I just can't handle getting into heated debates (or verbal fights) online anymore. It stresses me out too much.
1 person likes this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
13 Jun 17
@Srbageldog _Discussions often turn into arguments and the only thing then that matters is proving you are right and the other side wrong. If an argument can end a friendship, you're probably better off knowing how brittle and shallow that friendship was.
1 person likes this
@responsiveme (22926)
• India
13 Jun 17
I avoid sensitive discussions and people who are rude
1 person likes this
@josie_ (10034)
• Philippines
14 Jun 17
@responsiveme _I don't avoid sensitive discussions but rude people I try to stay away from.
1 person likes this
