From Everything to Nothing

Thank you for your words. I try to remind myself that truly I don't have it that bad, that I've been through worse, but more often than not it just seems like everytime I think I can do something I get knocked back down again. I know I should be very grateful but I've never been in a situation like this and I have no friends or family close by. I could tuck tail and go back home to my dad but he's the reason I left in the first place. He said that I was worthless and could not make it on my own. I wanted to prove him wrong but so far I'm proving him right. And how do I get a job with no car and the closest town is 15 miles away? I keep telling myself if only I had a car everything would be better.

@PyroWysdom This I do understand, that is why all our kids moved to the town over because this one has next to nothing. If like us there is no buses or anything too huh? I know my husband had to get a job that is over an hour from us so it is a long trip everyday. As for your father some people shouldn't have ever been parents, my bio dad included. Don't play into his crap talk. Think of how you can change things, see if there is programs to help you, if so use it as a step up and not just a handout. Hoping the best for you.

@Ithink thank you. Yeah I'm in a rural area and nothing for miles except desert. No transit. No nothing lol. I just try to sell my art online. I do get some assistance but nearest grocery store is 15 miles away. With all the positive thoughts I am feeling better today and actually got out of bed. Thank you.

I'm trying. I just can't seem to stop feeling sorry for myself and I don't know what to do anymore.

@PyroWysdom I know that it's a lot easier said than done. Counting your blessings might help. I don't know your religious leanings, but I do know that for me, talking to Jesus makes things look better. I hope you don't mind if I pray for you.

@peavey I don't mind. I lost my faith a long time ago. Now I'm just here yes know. I get these bursts of energy to get something done but then something happens and I wind up just wanting to sleep and do nothing. I wish I was normal.

@PyroWysdom That's the spirit. Never give up so easily.

I just get so depressed and overwhelmed and think how much easier it would be to just give up but I still have a bit of stubbornness left in me.