The Curse of The Side Chick

• United States

3 Dec 17

I thought I did but every single time I give someone a chance, they are already involved with somebody. You would think guys would just have the decency to leave you alone if they know they are with someone else.

1 person likes this

Laurel (L_B)

@Happy2BeMe (99380)

• Canada

3 Dec 17

@stacysdeadright you would think so. Not all guys are like that. There are good ones out there.

1 person likes this

• United States

3 Dec 17

@Happy2BeMe I've met like 2 in all my years on earth, so I know they're out there but they are just hard to find. Maybe I need to move to a different environment.

1 person likes this

MarappleStiffy

@marapplestiffy (2182)

• Philippines

4 Dec 17

I didn’t hit like because I hate this...been a side-chick, and from your responses to other comments here I was the same as you...I had someone pursue me when he was already in a serious relationship with another woman and I was unaware! Oh! how sweet he was, he poured so much romantic gestures that I fell for him, then I learned that he was engaged to someone else! It was a huge blow... and it was excruciating to choose the right thing by taking myself out of the equation... it was so tempting to give in to his promises that I was the one he loved and he just needed to end things with her... but it was BS, even if he would leave her for me, how can I say he won’t do the same thing to me in the near future? And if he was really in love with me why didn’t he end it first before pursuing me? But I can’t even begin to describe how painfull it was...so, just hang in there... and know that just like me, you’ll find someone better than that a$$hole...and it helps to never give your heart until he’s introduced you to his family too...

1 person likes this

MarappleStiffy

@marapplestiffy (2182)

• Philippines

5 Dec 17

@stacysdeadright

it is and yes, for a while I couldn’t trust another man but my husband is a gem so don’t let those scumbags win...although there are a lot of men like them, there are still few good ones left... I hope you find one but until then just take your time to heal...

1 person likes this

• United States

5 Dec 17

Omg! I am so sorry that happened to you. What I went through and what others like yourself have gone through numerous times, is why I don't have faith in relationships anymore. I can't help but think what if I had engaged to the one that said he wanted to marry me, but before we got to a ring or anything I found out he wasn't faithful either. Just reading your comment, I think wow I could've been the fiance of a man who was just like that. These things take so much time to heal that it's actually really sad that so many have had to go through it, as often as we do.

1 person likes this

• United States

5 Dec 17

@marapplestiffy Thank you. I want to not date anyone for a year straight. Anybody who shows up now, will have to settle for being friends for a long time first. No casually hooking up or anything, just vibe together.

1 person likes this

Max Crisp

@Orson_Kart (6841)

• United Kingdom

3 Dec 17

That's your decision. If you know he is already with someone else, why become his bit on the side?

1 person likes this

Max Crisp

@Orson_Kart (6841)

• United Kingdom

3 Dec 17

@stacysdeadright Is that you in your profile? If so, then you won't be short of admirers. You'll just have to vet potential suiters more carefully in future.

• United States

5 Dec 17

@Orson_Kart Not really. It does look a lot like me though which is why I chose it. I have had my share of stalkers on Facebook, so I haven't been posting my real info or pictures anywhere lately. Had some really weird situations not to mention the unsolicited pics....UGH.

1 person likes this

• United States

3 Dec 17

It never starts that way. I always find out later when my feelings are involved.

1 person likes this

Jennifer

@LovingMyBabies (85288)

• Valdosta, Georgia

3 Dec 17

My answer would be the good guys aren't always the best looking, the most put together or the most wealthy. If that's what your chasing after you will forever be a secret. Step out of your comfort zone. Look for someone your not attracted to physically or who aren't the wealthy ones. Stop worrying so much about your appearance or theirs. Worry about the inside since that's where the truth lies. I have a friend who always chased after the most attractive guy she could find and was always heart broken. Now she's with someone she was not so physically attracted to, started out as a friendship and he treats her like gold!

1 person likes this

• United States

5 Dec 17

I don't really chase anyone. Some of the guys who approach me are not even that good looking, but they are confident which is what I am naturally drawn to. I've had a few less confident guys take me out and they kind of bored me. It's not so much the look, but it's a certain personality. I think I'm naturally drawn to bad boys, in all honesty. Sometimes I may even see signs that they fool with other girls, but lately it's been more than just fooling with other girls. These " bad boys" have the nerve to still behave that way while they are in serious relationships. I have no problem with getting to know a guy and seeing if he could calm down if in a relationship. The last two just confused me so badly with how sneaky they were. I was wondering why we would meet at weird times in certain places, turns out they were avoiding getting caught cheating. It was just crazy how single these guys act.

paigea

@paigea (36316)

• Canada

3 Dec 17

As soon as someone is secretive, walk away fast. Don't accept it for a minute.

1 person likes this

paigea

@paigea (36316)

• Canada

3 Dec 17

@stacysdeadright absolutely. They are not worth it.

1 person likes this

• United States

3 Dec 17

This is so true. By wanting honesty I've been labeled insecure so i stopped asking for it but I still get screwed over. I guess that as soon as I see it, I should forget about them.

• United States

3 Dec 17

@paigea thank you for that advice. I've always thought I should give people the benefit of a doubt. But the few good guys I've met, they were 100% honest and upfront.

1 person likes this

Bhem

@JustBhem (70555)

• Davao, Philippines

3 Dec 17

We deserve someone better, if you think you are not happy with that kind of thing then it is best to let go.

1 person likes this

Bhem

@JustBhem (70555)

• Davao, Philippines

6 Dec 17

@stacysdeadright Good to hear that.

• United States

5 Dec 17

True. I have let go. It's just the 4th time it's happened in 2 years. I've been naive to the games.

1 person likes this

Lenore Plassman

@sallypup (61596)

• Centralia, Washington

3 Dec 17

Is that love and respect or is it just animal lust? Sure a shallow way to be.

• United States

3 Dec 17

I just give too many people the benefit of a doubt. Social media has made cheating way too easy and I guess I'm a bit naive.

1 person likes this

• United States

5 Dec 17

@sallypup Yeah, I've accidentally friend zoned a few guys. The good ones tend to back off when they see I'm interested in someone else. Sad thing is I've been interested in the wrong ones.

1 person likes this

NJ Chicaa

@NJChicaa (120084)

• United States

3 Dec 17

Why would you put up with such treatment?

NJ Chicaa

@NJChicaa (120084)

• United States

3 Dec 17

@stacysdeadright demand that you are treated with the respect you deserve. If a man isn’t proud to show you off to the world, then he isn’t worth your time.

1 person likes this

• United States

5 Dec 17

@NJChicaa I just have never been that demanding. I always thought that being laid back was a plus, but maybe that makes me a target.

• United States

3 Dec 17

I don't know. Lord knows I try not to.

1 person likes this