My Mother Will Live Forever
By patgalca
@patgalca (18393)
Orangeville, Ontario
January 19, 2018 8:45pm CST
When my mother was 91 she had a heart attack. She had a stent put in one artery but it was so big she could not have a stent put in another artery that needed it. It remains 85% blocked. A week after her heart attack she was speeding down the halls of her residence with her walker. I couldn't even keep up with her.
This past Tuesday my mother, age 93 now, fell and cracked a rib. She was bedridden for two days. She yelled when people tried to move her in a sitting position begging them to just let her lie the way she was. A couple of hours after that she stands up, puts her pants on, walks over to her closet, grabs a sweater and pulls it on over her head. She couldn't raise her arm up an hour earlier!!! She put her shoes on and insisted on going down to the coffee room for coffee and cookies. Again, she was speeding along with her walker.
She wondered how many times she would recover from things. I asked her if she was a cat. She laughed and said she hoped not that many times.
This woman is such a strong, determined woman. I told her Dad would be proud of his girl. She refuses to go down without a fight.
Meanwhile, there was a woman sitting in a wheelchair, head down, in front of the gas fireplace, all day long. She never moved, never changed position. I don't know whether she was sleeping but it sure seems like a terrible way to live out your last days.
And that's what my mother refuses to do.
Picture is from my mom's 90th birthday.
40 people like this
40 responses
@josie_ (10032)
• Philippines
20 Jan 18
Looking at her photo I can see the determination you write about. As the saying goes, "It's not the years in your life but the life in your years that count". She is someone to admire and her attitude to aspire to. I hope never to end up like the woman in the wheelchair. It's so depressing to just give up.
11 people like this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
I am starting to look and act like her. The last time I face timed with my daughter I said, "Remember this face because one day I will suddenly look like Grandma." I said that because my mother aged very suddenly. I have her formerly red hair.
8 people like this
@ricki_911 (21625)
• Toronto, Ontario
20 Jan 18
My grandma sounds like that. She has been up and cooking after surgery. She is always puttering around at 87
7 people like this
@LeaPea2417 (37381)
• Toccoa, Georgia
20 Jan 18
That is good your Mom stays active. If I live that long, I will try to be as active as I can be.
7 people like this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
My mother and father played badminton twice a week for years, until my father's heart attack at the age of 65. My mom also played a little tennis and did some swimming. She attributes her strength from living an active lifestyle. That's why I have to get back at it, though it's hard to do with fibromyalgia. I WISH I could play badminton but I have a bad shoulder (took a line drive soft ball to it back in my 20's).
2 people like this
@m_audrey6788 (58472)
• Germany
20 Jan 18
Wow! Your mother looks fantastic for her age How I wish my mother to be strong and healthy as hers when she turns 90
5 people like this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
The day that picture was taken, her 90th birthday party, was a good day. The dementia had already set in but she was still quite mobile. Since her heart attack at 91 we have insisted she use a walker. She wasn't using her walker when she fell.
2 people like this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
@m_audrey6788 She most certainly did.
2 people like this
@m_audrey6788 (58472)
• Germany
20 Jan 18
@patgalca Oh but atleast she enjoyed her life long
1 person likes this
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
20 Jan 18
Nice picture! Way to go! Looks like nothing can keep her down for long.
6 people like this
@averygirl72 (37845)
• Philippines
20 Jan 18
That's amazing. Wish I would be like that when I grow old. I want to be healthy and strong in my old age
5 people like this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
She is not very strong. She has become quite elderly and feeble the last couple of years. It was almost an overnight type of thing. But she was a very energetic woman in her younger years and continued to be very mobile up until a couple of years ago.
1 person likes this
@hereandthere (45645)
• Philippines
20 Jan 18
i love her hair and bright blue eyes. my mother also keeps going inspite of her legs.
5 people like this
@Marilynda1225 (83103)
• United States
20 Jan 18
Your mom is remarkable and I'm sure it would take a lot to keep her down. Hopefully we'll see your mom live a longer life. Beautiful picture
6 people like this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
A longer life as long as it's not a miserable one like the lady in the wheel chair by the fireplace. My mother has dementia and can't hear. We gave up on the hearing aids. She comes to family events and just sits alone until someone goes and talks to her, but really doesn't know what's going on and certainly doesn't remember it. Not sure she is living a happy life.
2 people like this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
Actually, she doesn't eat much of anything. It's a wonder she hasn't lost any weight. But she loves her sweets. She was brought a half of cheese & tomato sandwich, potato chips (what?), carrot soup (I think... I didn't like it), milk, apple juice and ice cream. All she ate was the ice cream. She has lost a lot of her teeth which we aren't bothering to have replaced at this time in her life, so she is limited. But she just doesn't like the taste of a lot of things.
3 people like this
@lookatdesktop (27134)
• Dallas, Texas
20 Jan 18
93 is an age of a person who knows how to live right. I am happy to know she is still alive and kicking. The people who manage to not let anything get them down are the ones like her. She is a fighter.
6 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
20 Jan 18
Your mom has a strong will! Good for her. When I visit my mother at the nursing home I too see many who just sit there and don't move much. For some it is their condition that leaves them immobile and not very responsive. For others it seems they are just existing.
3 people like this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
21 Jan 18
@patgalca they do seem to know when their time is coming to an end. The client that I see now with Alzheimer's tells me that she feels the presence of her husband who's been gone for about 15 years now.
1 person likes this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
22 Jan 18
@ElusiveButterfly My mother's sister told her kids she saw her husband. Her eldest said to her, "If you want to go then go." So she did.
1 person likes this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
I know. When my father's sister was bedridden she knew she was going soon. She woke up Christmas morning and said, "Why am I still here?" She wanted to be gone by then. She was all there in her mind though. She passed away a month later.
3 people like this
@kobesbuddy (78871)
• East Tawas, Michigan
20 Jan 18
Your mother has a remarkable love for her life, the quality existence that she has always known. My mother was exactly the same way, she radiated excitement about everything she experience. Each day was a new venture, Mom couldn't wait to get started, each morning! :) They are remarkable women!
3 people like this
@patgalca (18393)
• Orangeville, Ontario
20 Jan 18
Mom doesn't really have that mindset. She has dementia and doesn't remember anything. We don't tell her when we're visiting because she won't remember. She doesn't know how many great-grandchildren she has or their names. I wasn't sure she knew my name as I realized she hadn't called me by name in awhile. On Thursday she actually called me by both my sister's names then looked at me and said, "No, what's your name?" But before I could answer she answered herself. She doesn't see me as often as she sees my siblings. She is not excited about getting started each morning. She doesn't know what she is living before but she knows that getting up and moving around is better than just lying in bed.
3 people like this
@kobesbuddy (78871)
• East Tawas, Michigan
20 Jan 18
@patgalca My mother was mentally sharp, as a tack. She remembered everything, we couldn't hide a thing from her. Even the bills we paid, she needed to file the receipts in a drawer. Mom was with it, right up until her very last breath.
2 people like this
@kobesbuddy (78871)
• East Tawas, Michigan
20 Jan 18
@patgalca My mother's physical body went, while her mind worked overtime!:)
3 people like this