Who Do You Blame For Your Unhappiness? Yourself? or is it Another?

https://pixabay.com/en/fantasy-cave-mystical-rock-stone-2750995/
Dallas, Texas
March 28, 2018 6:34pm CST
I often hear those who are unhappy with the way things have gone when the path becomes darkest. They blame the Father. They blame themselves. They wonder if only a different path had been taken long ago? There is no one to place blame for all things that go wrong. The things that hurt us, make us stronger. The want for better days drives us to march forward in the dark until we reach a point where we begin to look within and a fine light becomes brighter inside us. The silence of night comes right at the moment of dawn when the light of daybreak comes again. Was this faith? Were we waiting for the next day? Or did the night fall too fast? Did we fall deeper into darkness? The tendency to bring us closer to the light of understanding makes us go forward, in spite of all signs to the opposite. That is why we learn from the things we once knew to be true and understand that truth is not always what we wanted it to be, and in the end, when the end comes, no one is to blame, No one will speak because it is in silence that we hear what our hearts can only feel.
11 people like this
11 responses
@Plethos (13581)
• United States
29 Mar 18
i blame myself.
2 people like this
• Dallas, Texas
29 Mar 18
I do for most of it. Yea. I do. It's hard to admit but yes, taking responsibility is the first step in becoming able to accept the things that can not be undone and hope for closure.
1 person likes this
@Plethos (13581)
• United States
30 Mar 18
@lookatdesktop - blaming others is just another way of not accepting responsibility and playing the victim card. F**k up, Own it, Fix it, Move on.
1 person likes this
29 Mar 18
Everytime if any work of which i am an active part gets bad I first always blame myself because I am playing an active role in that. If I found myself sufficiently responsible for the failure I don't blame others whether they have committed any mistake or not...its my fault. Sometimes I learn from people, sometimes I learn from situations.
2 people like this
• Dallas, Texas
29 Mar 18
You need not blame yourself for all your mistakes, most of us learn by doing things over if we fail the first time or the second and so on. Nobody is perfect.
1 person likes this
29 Mar 18
@lookatdesktop hmm..right
1 person likes this
@toniganzon (72281)
• Philippines
29 Mar 18
Very long time I go I always blamed others for my unhappiness. I blamed it on the mistakes they did to me. He who is the cause of the cause is the cause of the evil caused. That had been my thoughts before. So I was unhappy all the time back then. But I realised when I was in my mid 30s that I should be the source of my own happiness and I shouldn't' depend it on anybody or I'll be bound to be disappointed and unhappy all the time.
2 people like this
• Dallas, Texas
29 Mar 18
Well put. I like your way of putting logic to the situation.
1 person likes this
• Philippines
29 Mar 18
I could always blame myself for being unhappy but I am learning to know what's really important and the little things that should make you happy. I think being contented with what you have should make you happy.
2 people like this
• Dallas, Texas
29 Mar 18
Being content with yourself and appreciating the more basic things in life is what makes the most sense.
@franxav (13836)
• India
29 Mar 18
I took an important decision in my life which brought much suffering in my later life. It was my conscious decision so I don't blame anyone about it but I thought many of the sufferings were because of others' ways. Gradually, I have come to a point when I understand everything was in its place.
2 people like this
• Dallas, Texas
29 Mar 18
Yes, hind sight is more focused, after we get older and more introspective and wise.
@Starmaiden (9311)
• Canada
29 Mar 18
We are the creators of our own life circumstances. If people could understand that, they would surely change their behavior and ways of thinking. :-)
2 people like this
• Dallas, Texas
30 Mar 18
Good comment. I like.
@chavezrmc (6095)
• Philippines
29 Mar 18
Only you can be blame for you not being happy. It's a feeling and therefore it's your choice to be happy or not. We are all accountable for our own actions, whatever the outcome is. So we better think a hundred times before doing something. It might have positive or negative effect on us. Whatever comes out, at least you have tried. After all life is a journey so let's enjoy the ride and be happy.
1 person likes this
• Dallas, Texas
29 Mar 18
I agree on the second part of your statement about the journey. As for blaming yourself for not being happy is a bit too simple sometimes, not all the time but in some cases, like your health may not be good or you may have lost a friend or a job or the weather could be bad and you might not get that raise or promotion you expected or come in second place in a contest or a competition. Many factors, including our attitude play a role in our happiness or unhappiness and it is only from admitting to a mistake and realizing to do better and try harder is the best possible way to cope with life and it's misgivings. It is very complex a journey and full of many a winding path.
1 person likes this
@Bluedoll (16773)
• Canada
29 Mar 18
The deer in the picture is happy.
1 person likes this
@Bluedoll (16773)
• Canada
31 Mar 18
@lookatdesktop Isn't it a suiting reflex of our present world? I like going into the wilderness and I've taken a friend, a city person and they said they preferred the mall.
1 person likes this
• Dallas, Texas
1 Apr 18
@Bluedoll I understand this to be true in many cases. People in a big city often become alienated when out of their familiar environment. The mall to some people is what the park is for others. It's a matter of conditioning.
1 person likes this
• Dallas, Texas
30 Mar 18
That was the first thing I noticed in that picture. Strange that.
1 person likes this
@marlina (154131)
• Canada
30 Mar 18
I work at making myself happy, I do not rely on others.
1 person likes this
• Dallas, Texas
30 Mar 18
That is good that you manage it so well by yourself.
@Shiva49 (26670)
• Singapore
30 Mar 18
Indeed thought-provoking. I accept the state of my life and that means unhappiness does not find a place. I believe I get what I deserve and things could have been much worse. My health is not that good now but I am thankful for sixty plus years of good health that I enjoyed. Counting my blessings helps me to find peace of mind - siva
1 person likes this
• Dallas, Texas
30 Mar 18
I know what you mean.
1 person likes this
@Courage7 (19633)
• United States
29 Mar 18
Wow that painting is awesome..I hope I get to walk through there to God when I die!!!! Oh I blame my offspring..if it were not for them, I would have travelled the world lol
1 person likes this
• Dallas, Texas
29 Mar 18
1 person likes this
@Courage7 (19633)
• United States
29 Mar 18
1 person likes this