What to do when a deadbeat dad comes back.

March 31, 2018 12:19pm CST
I wonder what runs in the minds of those guys or girls for that matter who just disappear when they get a small baby. what do you think a single mom or dad should do in the case that the other person left immediately the baby was born? should they be allowed back in your child's life once they resurface keeping in mind that they have given no emotional or financial support? and how should you answer your child once they ask about the absentee parent? your views?
4 people like this
4 responses
@cintol (11261)
• United States
1 Apr 18
That is awful when parents do that to the child, I would not let them come waltzing back in and if I did they would have to prove themselves because I wouldn't want them coming back, getting the child used to them and then disappearing again when they feel like it.
1 person likes this
@marlina (154131)
• Canada
31 Mar 18
It all depends on each individual situation. Personally, I would not have too much forgiveness.
31 Mar 18
@marlina, I second you on that, personally I have suffered to bring up my son, would not even look at the guy twice, unless my son wants to look for him.
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@marlina (154131)
• Canada
31 Mar 18
@bettysteve I feel so bad that you had to go through all this all by yourself. Couldn't have been easy at all. How long was this? If you don't mind saying.
@marlina (154131)
• Canada
31 Mar 18
@bettysteve I sure can understand your point of view here: no second chance for a loser like that, in my books.
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
31 Mar 18
Maybe give them a chance since I believe in second chances, but the minute I see him slacking off again, then it is over. I will be honest with my kid about his father. No need to sugar coat things.
31 Mar 18
even after he left you to suffer on your own raising the baby solo?
@mlgen1037 (29886)
• Manila, Philippines
1 Apr 18
@bettysteve I would remember what he did of course but still he is the father of my baby. If he comes back and really proved himself, I dont mind. But if he does it again, then thats it for me.
1 person likes this
@Starmaiden (9311)
• Canada
31 Mar 18
I think everyone should be given a second chance, but they would need to ask for it. If a Father/ mother who abandoned his/her child does not come forward before the child reaches young adulthood, that decision should be made by the child whether he/she wants that parent in their life. :-)
• Canada
31 Mar 18
@bettysteve He can't. But after he has spent a number of decades living with his regret and assuming he wants to try, can he be given a clean slate with which to begin building and earning back the child's trust? Sort of akin to asking God for forgiveness. Can you assume that you received it, or will it show through your repentance? :-)
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31 Mar 18
@Starmaiden what if he messes it up?or if you have moved on with someone else?
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31 Mar 18
assuming he found out you were pregnant and wanted nothing to do with the baby, asked you to abort n all? then when the baby is all grown up, bright in school and all cute he wants back in after you struggled alone? how can he make up for that?
1 person likes this