Nobody Told Me There'd Be Days Like These

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I should start out by saying that there is a nail in my right rear tire, and while the nail is a good enough patch for the time being, it does slowly leak air. And so, when my dash tells me it needs some... I go and get some. I should also remind you that I am cheap. Pay for air? You MUST be insane! Not on your life. So, right down the street from my house is a Casey's General Store gas station and convenience store that offers free air. I went there and the air machine was "out of service." No worries. I went up the street a little farther to Zephyr Express. It's 75 cents there, but oh well. I pulled up, got out of the truck, and saw a sign that said, "Out of service." No worries. I know another place. I told the wife I would just get it at ANOTHER Casey's by Menards since I had to go to the bank to make a deposit anyway., and my bank is near Menards. I pulled up to the ATM machine with two checks I needed to deposit. Stuck my card in the slot, and proceeded with the commands on the screen. Deposited both checks and went to complete my transaction, only to have a screen pop up that said... This transaction is not authorized at this location. WHAT???!!! My two checks spat back out and I repeated the process. Same result. What in the Sam Hell is going on here? I wondered, confounded. Then it hit me... I was trying to complete my deposit using my Discover card. Not my DEBIT card. Once I realized this, I was able to make my deposit. I still also had to go to Walmart, so when I got the where I needed to make my turn, I made a left instead of a right. The right would have taken me to the Casey's by Menards. "I thought you said you were going to Casey's," the wife said, confused. I told her there was another Casey's in the opposite direction and I would just go there since it was on the way to Walmart and closer. My wife was insistent that there was not a Casey's where I was headed. I was insistent she was wrong. I pulled up to the station and somewhere along the line it has been changed to a Conoco. When the eff did it change? No worries. I will just get air there anyway, even if I have to pay for it. But they had no air machine, and the one that was there was just a box with no air line from when it was a Casey's before. Up the street from there is a Circle K. Still on the way to Walmart. I will just get air there. And I know the air there is free as well. Pulled up to the Circle K and up the air machine to see someone had cut the end off of the air line and another sign saying, "Sorry, out of service." BTW, I am not kidding. This is exactly how it happened. Screw it, MotoMart is also on the way to effing Walmart, and I will just get my effing air there! Aha! Finally. Not only did the air machine work but the air was FREE! I reveled despite my mire and the shaking head of my wife who has also been on me to just get the damn tire fixed already. We finally made it to Walmart only to realize that the mask I always keep in the console was left on the kitchen table because I had decided to wash it the night before and LEFT IT AT HOME! I wish somebody had told me there would be days like these.