Early to work today.

@arunima25 (87806)
Bangalore, India
January 23, 2023 8:22pm CST
Good morning from this side of the planet. It's 7:40 AM as I write this post. Here it's another gloomy cloudy morning and it's foggy outside. . I enjoyed walking to the work in this morning fog. . It was foggy but not too chill. My light jacket was good enough. . I generally come to the work around 8:30. Today I was quite early here at 7 and I could sense a weird silence. This was to accomodate a parents meeting. We could not meet the father in the last few months as nothing in the late hours suited him. So, we accomodated him in the morning at 7. He is busy father with a lot of work load. I have met mom a couple of times as she is the primary caregiver of this 7 years old boy on spectrum. But as a school policy, we need at least one meeting with both parents together. So, we got flexible and accomodated him. And not to my surprise, he seemed totally unaware of any happenings in his son's life. He was totally oblivious to everything or at least pretend to. He seemed pretty disinterested too and kept looking at his watch to end and rush out. I doubt that if he is really busy with his work or finding an excuse to run away and not address the elephant in the room.Even my suggestion to come and attend the parents group session that I conduct once every month for parents with special needs children was rejected with an excuse that he has lot happening in work life. He has a lot on his plate to take care of and definitely his son and his needs were nowhere on his need. Mom is very involved and a wonderful caregiver. But she looks tired. Taking care of two children under 7 and one being on spectrum is no joke. I wish she had more support from family to ease her stress off. Well, this is not my first time to face such case It's not easy to accept and move on. Denial is definitely there and in some cases it leads to escape later if you can. I have seen many parents especially fathers getting transformed after few parents group sessions and counseling. I hope that this gentleman, a young father , would consider it. That's all the blabbering from this sids.It was not a meeting that would be considered a good start of the work day. Now I have more than a hour. My session starts at 9. I can grab my breakfast and mylot till then. I packed my breakfast as I was in rush.. Soon the weird silence would disappear. The school buses will start coming by 8. So, let me enjoy it till it's there. Have a good time in your mylot corner
12 people like this
12 responses
@Nakitakona (56486)
• Philippines
5 Feb 23
I have just completed my late afternoon walk with 3.37 km and 6,077 steps. Calories burned is 76.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Wow! Sounds good. Even I had a lot of steps in the last few days. I don't keep a track of it. On Saturday we went for a trekking on the outskirts of the city. We covered around 14 kms to and fro on the trail.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
9 Feb 23
@Nakitakona These gadgets are good to keep a track and it also helps you stay motivated.
1 person likes this
@Nakitakona (56486)
• Philippines
7 Feb 23
@arunima25 I have a smart watch which records my steps, the distance I walk and the calories I burn and even my heart rate.
1 person likes this
@RubyHawk (99405)
• Atlanta, Georgia
24 Jan 23
I'm sorry you didn't get a good response from this dad. it's too bad he doesn't take any interest in his child.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Yes, he should be more involved. He seemed to be a very fine young gentleman. It just seems that he is still struggling with the acceptance there that his son has autism. Can't blame him. It's really tough as a parent. It seems that he is in denial and chooses to Yes,in our society mothers become the main caregiver and father's role is limited to being a provider. Though it's changing with the changing socio economic conditions. Here, it is a special child and he needs more hand holding and care than a regular neurotypical child. He has a lot of issues and needs care. It would be draining for one parent to do that all.. Hoping that he will be changed in course of time. He has to accept it sooner or later. Escaping away would not help.
1 person likes this
@RubyHawk (99405)
• Atlanta, Georgia
7 Feb 23
@arunima25 Maybe it will finally get through to the father that his son needs his attention.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
9 Feb 23
@RubyHawk Yes, we all hope that. The sooner, tge better it would be for the whole family.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (136401)
• India
24 Jan 23
Not surprised that this father is indifferent which generally is the case Mothers are always involved with their children.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (136401)
• India
6 Feb 23
@arunima25 You are doing your bit and that helps
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@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
@allknowing Yes, it does to some extent. Mother has started coming to the group parents session. At least she is getting an outlet for her feelings sharing with other parents of special children. I have just asked father to come at least once a month. If he gets few more such fathers to be his friend there, it would be easier for him..Having an emotional support system does wonders.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Yes,in our society mothers become the main caregiver and father's role is limited to being a provider. Though it's changing with the changing socio economic conditions. Here, it is a special child and he needs more hand holding and care than a regular neurotypical child. He has a lot of issues and needs care. It would be draining for one parent to do that all.
1 person likes this
@just4him (317041)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
26 Jan 23
I'm sorry the father isn't interested in his son's education. I hope you had a good rest of the day when the students arrived.
1 person likes this
@just4him (317041)
• Green Bay, Wisconsin
6 Feb 23
@arunima25 It would be good if he does.
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@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
9 Feb 23
@just4him Yes. These support groups help a lot to cope up with the situation. I hope he gets it soon. The sooner, the better it would be for the entire family.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Yes,in our society mothers become the main caregiver and father's role is limited to being a provider. Though it's changing with the changing socio economic conditions. Here, it is a special child and he needs more hand holding and care than a regular neurotypical child. He has a lot of issues and needs care. It would be draining for one parent to do that all. I hope that he starts coming to the group parents classes. That will benefit him too.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (339930)
• Rockingham, Australia
24 Jan 23
It seems like the father is embarrassed about his son or in denial. Good to see you again too. I hope you're doing well.
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (339930)
• Rockingham, Australia
24 Jan 23
@arunima25 You always sound very busy but it's nice to see you back again.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
26 Jan 23
@JudyEv I am always itching to be here. But then time becomes a constraint. Off late, I am busy with work and there is another fund raising on 5 February. I wanted to make some more money online to donate there. So, I am giving more time to two other sites where I can make more in the same time. But then one can not stay from Mylot for too long. Maybe after the fund raising, I can be more here.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
24 Jan 23
Some might not be embarassed but want to stay out. Either they are not sure how to help or find it very challenging and escape. I have to meet him few more times to actually nail down the issue. Hope he is ready to take help. I couldn't be much here. A lot kept me away from online space.
1 person likes this
@Nevena83 (65277)
• Serbia
24 Jan 23
Here, fathers are very little involved in their children's lives, and I don't think that's good.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
He seemed to be a very fine young gentleman. It just seems that he is still struggling with the acceptance there that his son has autism. Can't blame him. It's really tough as a parent. It seems that he is in denial and chooses to Yes,in our society mothers become the main caregiver and father's role is limited to being a provider. Though it's changing with the changing socio economic conditions. Here, it is a special child and he needs more hand holding and care than a regular neurotypical child. He has a lot of issues and needs care. It would be draining for one parent to do that all.. Hoping that he will be changed in course of time.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
11 Feb 23
@Nevena83 That's terrible. I read one article with that kind of data. Unfortunately these innocent children have been taken as a cause for divorce, separations or rocking marriages
1 person likes this
@Nevena83 (65277)
• Serbia
9 Feb 23
@arunima25 I have heard many parents who have children with autism and they say that it is really very difficult, but here only the mothers stay with such children, the fathers usually leave.
1 person likes this
• Canada
24 Jan 23
7am! I am NOT a morning person. I've been at the office at 9pm more often than at 9am!
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Ha ha! I am a morning person and I am most productive in the morning. I start my weekdays at 5 and weekends at 7 in the morning. Well, I work in a school. So, my work has fixed timings.
@ptrikha_2 (46951)
• India
24 Jan 23
Some folks' lives can be so stressful and full of challenges. May be in the case you mentioned, father has something on his mind which he is unable to tell. Sometimes it's not cold when it's foggy. Anyways have a nice Tuesday.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Yes, he should be more involved as a father. He seemed to be a very fine young gentleman. It just seems that he is still struggling with the acceptance there that his son has autism. Can't blame him. It's really tough as a parent. It seems that he is in denial and chooses to Yes,in our society mothers become the main caregiver and father's role is limited to being a provider. Though it's changing with the changing socio economic conditions. Here, it is a special child and he needs more hand holding and care than a regular neurotypical child. He has a lot of issues and needs care. It would be draining for one parent to do that all.. Hoping that he will be changed in course of time. I hope that he joins the parent group session. That would help him too.
@tammys85 (30066)
• Baltimore, Maryland
25 Jan 23
Wow, I get he might have a lot on his plate, but he needs to be involved in his child's education too.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
25 Jan 23
Yes, he should be. He seemed to be a very fine young gentleman. It just seems that he is still struggling with the acceptance there that his son has autism. Can't blame him. It's really tough as a parent. It seems that he is in denial and chooses to Yes,in our society mothers become the main caregiver and father's role is limited to being a provider. Though it's changing with the changing socio economic conditions. Here, it is a special child and he needs more hand holding and care than a regular neurotypical child. He has a lot of issues and needs care. It would be draining for one parent to do that all.. Hoping that he will be changed in course of time.
@LindaOHio (178568)
• United States
24 Jan 23
I hope the father becomes more involved and more attentive. Wishing you a good day.
1 person likes this
@LindaOHio (178568)
• United States
6 Feb 23
@arunima25 Thank you for your thoughtful response. I am doing OK. Hope you are fine.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
9 Feb 23
@LindaOHio Yes, all okay at my end
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Yes, he should be. He seemed to be a very fine young gentleman. It just seems that he is still struggling with the acceptance there that his son has autism. Can't blame him. It's really tough as a parent. It seems that he is in denial and chooses to Yes,in our society mothers become the main caregiver and father's role is limited to being a provider. Though it's changing with the changing socio economic conditions. Here, it is a special child and he needs more hand holding and care than a regular neurotypical child. He has a lot of issues and needs care. It would be draining for one parent to do that all.. Hoping that he will be changed in course of time. Hope you are doing good.
1 person likes this
@Kandae11 (55012)
24 Jan 23
I hope that father has a change of heart. The burden is lighter when two share it.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Yes, he should be. He seemed to be a very fine young gentleman. It just seems that he is still struggling with the acceptance there that his son has autism. Can't blame him. It's really tough as a parent. It seems that he is in denial and chooses to Yes,in our society mothers become the main caregiver and father's role is limited to being a provider. Though it's changing with the changing socio economic conditions. Here, it is a special child and he needs more hand holding and care than a regular neurotypical child. He has a lot of issues and needs care. It would be draining for one parent to do that all.. Hoping that he will be changed in course of time. Mother seems to be in a bad shape, always exhausted and drained out. I am worried that this will lead to ill health of hers in coming time. She is overburdened.
@CarolDM (203422)
• Nashville, Tennessee
24 Jan 23
Good to see you. The fog is nice to see. Glad your walk was a good one. Life can be stressful for everyone at times.
1 person likes this
@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
6 Feb 23
Yes, life can be stressful for everyone. The major hurdle is the acceptance of the situation. And here I strongly feel that the father is facing that. It's not easy to accept the fact that your child is one with special needs. He is hurt and he would take time to come to terms with it. Joining a parent group session would help. I hope that he takes that advice seriously. Sharing and caring helps us heal fast and move ahead
1 person likes this
@CarolDM (203422)
• Nashville, Tennessee
6 Feb 23
@arunima25 You are very right about that. I wish him the best. Life can be very difficult.
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@arunima25 (87806)
• Bangalore, India
9 Feb 23
@CarolDM Yes, life is fair to none. Everyone gets their share of pain.
1 person likes this