How I met my husband

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I always hear all of these stories about how people met their significant others. I don't have a neat story. I met my husband on a free dating site. I think the most interesting aspect about it was that he said he had messaged me a year or two prior and I never responded but I didn't remember having ever received a message. I do remember seeing his picture under people who had viewed my profile previously but never did get a message until a year or two later. I remember thinking he looked like an odd combination of Jerry Lewis and Ray Romano. Neither of which I've ever been attracted to but somehow I did find him attractive. I've always liked men with dark hair and blue eyes both of which he has. I also like taller guys but have dated a lot of shorter guys over the years to the point that my mom was shocked when I brought him home. She whispered to me "he's tall" and I laughed she was referencing a couple of the other guys I had dated that didn't work out for one reason or another that were on the shorter side. One was a few inches shorter than me. I have always had a "type" I guess but I wasn't strict about it. I was always willing to give guys a chance but sometimes things just didn't click and I was always honest about it and the guys always seemed to respect that I didn't string them along and some I even stayed friends with over the years. One is currently transitioning to a female and is asexual so I'd say I called that one. He still goes by male for the time being but I don't begrudge him and wish him luck. Anyway, I digress. My husband and I began messaging each other off and on and I remember getting into an argument with him at one point over what I can't recall and neither can he all we both remember is he was being a jerk and I told him to leave me alone and I didn't want to talk to him anymore. A few months later he messaged me profusely apologizing to me saying he had a bad day that he wrongly took his anger out on me and that something I said just struck a sore subject and he should have been kinder about it. We went back to talking again for about a year and were just friends who hadn't even met but continued to talk to the point we felt we could confide in each other in a way we couldn't with people we knew in person I was still getting over someone else that things didn't work out with and he was interested in someone else that it also didn't work out with. Eventually, he told me he liked me but we didn't get too far before he just up and disappeared. I had no clue what happened and I remember this other guy had been pestering me to go out with him but I wasn't interested I still liked the guy who would later become my husband but I hadn't heard from him in a while and thought maybe I should just cave and give this other guy a chance. Just as I was about to tell this other guy yes to the date he kept bugging me for my husband appeared out of nowhere and messaged me. Apparently, he had been thrown in jail because he wasn't able to pay child support thanks to struggling to find a job. He was living with some friends at the time and struggling to just get by which I guess would be a turn-off to most people but I always believe if you give people a chance that things can or will work out eventually. I've never been obsessed with money. He asked if we could start talking on the phone and get back to where we left off so we started to talk on the phone and we video chatted and we got really close. He eventually asked me to go out with him. He did some computer work to help him pay for our date but I told him I didn't want him paying my way and I paid for myself. I remember that date well. I also remember after the date the guy I had finally managed to get over decided to call me out of nowhere almost like he sensed I was moving on and I remember telling him I just got back from a date and he got quiet and then decided to tell me he was getting married something I highly doubt he would have mentioned had I not said something about my date. This guy was something else. Anyway, my husband and I started going out more and more until eventually he kind of moved in without me realizing it. He had been job searching since we got together with no real luck. I helped him a lot financially in the beginning of our relationship and people thought he was using me for money. Eventually, he finally got a job but then promptly lost it 90 days later thanks to a coworker that I won't get into. He then got another job a few weeks later and stayed with it for over ten years before moving on to greener pastures. My husband hasn't been without a job for longer than a few weeks since then. He is currently working two jobs. Everyone who judged him for not having a job in the beginning has had to change their stance and some it has taken longer than others. My husband works harder than most of those people who talked badly about him before. My husband can still be a jerk at times and he will be the first to admit it but he has always been there for me when I needed him and he has always had my back. I often ask him why he chose me and he told me it was my sense of humor and my understanding nature that drew him in. No one is perfect and he definitely knows how to get under my skin at times but he is nothing like people thought he was in the beginning. He has gone on to prove everyone wrong. My husband is the hardest working person I know. He also managed to pay off all of his back child support and has been caught up since our son was three or four. My husband struggled for a job around the time of the last recession which made finding a job harder. He has not had any trouble since then. People are always going to be quick to judge but when you know something is right you just know. My husband and I may have met thanks to an online dating site but I feel like all of the ups and downs have made up for our lack of an interesting beginning story.