We're still reeling from the shock

@JudyEv (338657)
Rockingham, Australia
October 19, 2023 10:29pm CST
The photo has nothing to do with the post but my roses are blooming very nicely now. This is last year's photo. We have gifted our sons some money. My father was very generous to us when we were still making our way in the world. He always said that, at that stage of our lives, we needed help more than we would when he passed away. One son is using the money we sent to help get a mortgage on his first-ever house. The bank wanted confirmation that our contribution was a ‘gift’ and not a ‘loan. We needed papers signed by a lawyer and a letter from the lawyer saying we’d had legal advice. A notary, Justice of the Peace or magistrate wouldn’t do. It had to be a lawyer. We found a lawyer and saw him this morning. We didn’t really need legal advice but he spent a couple of minutes to make sure we knew what we were signing, etc. He witnessed our signatures, went off for a few minutes and came back with necessary letter and we were free to go. Vince asked how much we owed him and he said he wasn’t charging. Honestly? We took up his time and he was certainly entitled to charge something but no, he just sent us on our way. He asked us to leave a positive review on his website. That will be a pleasure.
25 people like this
29 responses
@Juliaacv (50852)
• Canada
20 Oct 23
That was very generous of the lawyer, he obviously saw the good that you and Vince are doing for your son and felt that was his way of helping. We received money once from my Dad when we were in our late 20's and had just bought a home. My hubby tore the cheque up in front of him, telling him that we were fine. My Dad wrote a second cheque, that too, my hubs ripped but the third time, my Dad made the cheque out in both of our names, and not just mine, and he looked at my hubby sitting in an arm chair near his, and said now I do not have to want to reorder cheques before I need to, so please do not destroy this one. My hubby realized the good that he was trying to do and accepted it. We have been in such a position to assist our son, the purchase of his first home, a new furnace a few months later in that home, new top of the line appliances in his current home. He realizes how hard Dad and I have had to work for that and he does not take it lightly at all. And as a parent it is a wonderful feeling of accomplishment to see your grown children coming into their own and making the adult decisions that come with a bit of help.
7 people like this
@Juliaacv (50852)
• Canada
20 Oct 23
@JudyEv My ancestors also cleared the family farm with axes back in the 1800's when they became homesteaders here. Farm living is hard but allows for such a rewarding life.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
My Dad cleared his first farm with an axe and often said that a bit of help back then would have made a huge difference. Our sons appreciate our help and we can spare the funds now while having enough to cover our future needs.
5 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
@Juliaacv I have great admiration for our ancestors. I have their old diaries and have been transcribing some of them. They worked so hard in those days.
4 people like this
@Tampa_girl7 (50080)
• United States
20 Oct 23
That was very kind of him. I know that it feels good to be able to bless your sons..
7 people like this
@Tampa_girl7 (50080)
• United States
20 Oct 23
@JudyEv I know that he is grateful.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
It's when young couples are trying to establish themselves that a bit of extra cash can really help. By the time they get it when we have passed away, they won't need it nearly as much as they do now. Our son is soon to turn 50 but he hasn't had a regular 9 to 5 job till recently so wasn't able to get a bank loan until now.
5 people like this
@allknowing (135327)
• India
20 Oct 23
When you said you were reeling under shock a whole lot of disastrous situations floated in front of my eyes No big deal offering free service (lol)
6 people like this
@allknowing (135327)
• India
20 Oct 23
@JudyEv I will remember this. When Billu disappeared I should have given an appropriate title to attract readers (lol)
4 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
The title was designed to draw in readers. We thought it was a very big deal as lawyers usually charge of lot of money for any of their services, large or small. We were very appreciative.
4 people like this
@RebeccasFarm (89741)
• Arvada, Colorado
20 Oct 23
This is the son in Australia right? Not the one in Ireland Judy..anyway this is very good of you and that lawyer was a good person.
4 people like this
• Arvada, Colorado
20 Oct 23
@JudyEv Yes I understand. Goodo then in any case.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
No, the one in Ireland is buying a house and the bank needed assurance that we wouldn't want the money back at some stage.
4 people like this
@LadyDuck (470776)
• Switzerland
20 Oct 23
That was very nice and generous. I have to think that in our days a positive note on the website is more important than to charge a small amount for signing documents. Our lawyer/notary is a friend, she only charges what she is charged by the official offices, we are also lucky.
5 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
He said it would cost him more to draw up the invoice but we've learnt since that he does a lot of pro bono work for various charities.
4 people like this
@LadyDuck (470776)
• Switzerland
20 Oct 23
@JudyEv He is a very kind person. I usually bring a gift for Christmas to ours.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
21 Oct 23
@LadyDuck We will make a donation to a charity that he helps. It's the least we can do.
1 person likes this
@MarieCoyle (36709)
20 Oct 23
That's amazing. I did have a friend from college who was a lawyer. She did a few minor things for me way back in the day when I lost several family members in a short time and absolutely refused payment. I bought an assortment of good steaks from a local small specialty shop and had them packed up and delivered to her. Her husband loved to grill outside, they loved that gift. They moved to London as her only child lives there, but we are still in touch.
4 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
That's great that you are still in touch with your friend. I'm sure she really appreciated your gift.
3 people like this
@MarieCoyle (36709)
20 Oct 23
@JudyEv She did a lot of pro bono work to help families. She wasn't rich by any means, a good lady. I wish she still lived here in the US, I miss her.
2 people like this
@AmbiePam (91947)
• United States
20 Oct 23
Oh wow! I thought you had bad news, but that is awesome!
4 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
I thought it was a good title to catch readers' attention.
3 people like this
@BarBaraPrz (47125)
• St. Catharines, Ontario
20 Oct 23
That is a shock: a lawyer not counting billable hours.
3 people like this
@ptrikha_2 (46831)
• India
21 Oct 23
That is very nice of that lawyer. Generally we see Lawyers always trying to make more money at our expense. I had an experience early this year of getting an affidavit made and one of the lawyers charged me almost the double. I hope that your overall plans go as expected.
3 people like this
@ptrikha_2 (46831)
• India
23 Oct 23
@JudyEv Yes and such people are rare in the world !
1 person likes this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
23 Oct 23
Thanks for the good wishes. We were really at his mercy as we had to get the documentation we needed. It was a good opportunity for him to charge as much as he liked really but instead he gave us his time and expertise for free.
1 person likes this
@jstory07 (139354)
• Roseburg, Oregon
20 Oct 23
That was nice of you to give that money to your son. My Dad always said help your children when they need it not when you are gone.
4 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
That's what my Dad said and we're trying to do the same. Neither of our sons have children and won't have them but they are generous in other ways.
3 people like this
@sallypup (60790)
• Centralia, Washington
20 Oct 23
That's wonderful that you can help your son. Some years ago we took out a loan and enabled our daughter to put money down on a house.
3 people like this
@sallypup (60790)
• Centralia, Washington
20 Oct 23
@JudyEv My daughter will have her hands full after our passing. She will inherit this monster house etc.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
I'm sure your daughter appreciated it. The boys will get all our money when we're gone but it will do them more good to have some of it now while they're getting established.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
21 Oct 23
@sallypup That's why we're trying to downsize and simplify things for them.
2 people like this
• Defuniak Springs, Florida
20 Oct 23
That is nice. A lawyer could easily of charged at least a few dollars for that
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
Lawyers here are renowned for charging top dollar for anything. We were very impressed.
1 person likes this
• Defuniak Springs, Florida
25 Oct 23
@JudyEv I was told I should get a lawyer medical malpractice situation after a ER sent me away a coule weeks ago when they coudlnt get blood draw
1 person likes this
• Defuniak Springs, Florida
25 Oct 23
@JudyEv I was told I should get a lawyer medical malpractice situation after a ER sent me away a coule weeks ago when they coudlnt get blood draw
• Belews Creek, North Carolina
20 Oct 23
A lawyer who doesn't fit the stereotype. That's a pleasant surprise!
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
21 Oct 23
There are so many terrible jokes about lawyers. We were quite prepared to have to pay something but were just hoping it wouldn't be too exorbitant.
3 people like this
21 Oct 23
Thats so sweet of him. How generous!
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
23 Oct 23
We thought it was very generous of him too. He was entitled to charge us something.
@Tina30219 (81834)
• Onaway, Michigan
20 Oct 23
That was nice of him to do. I hope your son enjoys his new home when he gets it. I love rosesI told me boyfriend next year I want some rose bushes
2 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
21 Oct 23
Everyone's roses are blooming at the moment and they look very lovely.
1 person likes this
@Tina30219 (81834)
• Onaway, Michigan
21 Oct 23
@JudyEv My mom already cut hers for the winter it is starting to get cold here where we are.
2 people like this
@innertalks (21869)
• Australia
20 Oct 23
It sounds like that those bankers should learn something from that lawyer. They were very mean and strict, to make you do that. Surely at nearly 50, they could have given the benefit of the doubt to your son, that he had saved that money somehow, for a deposit. When I was younger, I was a bit of a spendthrift, and I had no money for a deposit on my first car. My Uncle somehow heard of this, and he gave me $2,000, a lot in those days. The car cost more than that, so I needed to take out a loan too. The car yard, asked me where I got that money from, and I told them that I was good at saving, and they praised me, telling me that not many young men had such a good ethic with money, as which I did. They were happy to sell me the car, and to approve my loan. It was a white lie, I told them, and I have felt a bit bad about that ever since.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
21 Oct 23
I wouldn't worry about the white lie too much. The bank was worried that we might want our contribution back some time in the future. Really, they were just protecting their interests but it did look like it might cost us a bit just to get the papers signed.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
23 Oct 23
@innertalks The money we gave him showed up as several quite large deposits in his bank statements so he didn't really have a good way to explain them away.
2 people like this
@innertalks (21869)
• Australia
21 Oct 23
@JudyEv What I was implying there though, was that your son must have told the bank that he got the money from you. At nearly fifty, he could have told them, or let them think, that he saved up that deposit himself, like which I did. Yes, you were lucky not to have had to pay the lawyer's fees, which for a consultation, and signing of papers, etc. could have cost you quite a lot. They usually charge big money even just for a phone call.
2 people like this
@Shiva49 (26641)
• Singapore
20 Oct 23
My lawyer refused to charge me for our will. I did insist but he stood his ground. I also helped my son with the initial payment for his apartment in London. It is good to be of help when they have to make such investments.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
21 Oct 23
Young people have more need of help when they are just starting out. By the time we die, hopefully our sons will be established and won't have so much need of our money.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
23 Oct 23
@Shiva49 That's a great quote indeed. We don't have enough to give them so that they can do nothing but we do help where we can.
1 person likes this
@Shiva49 (26641)
• Singapore
21 Oct 23
@JudyEv I agree. One of my favorite quotes from Warren Buffet: "I'll give my children 'enough money so they would feel they could do anything, but not so much that they could do nothing'".
2 people like this
@nela13 (58491)
• Portugal
20 Oct 23
so nice of him, most lawyers have higher fees and charge every single thing they do. He deserves a good review.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
21 Oct 23
Lawyers have a very bad reputation, that's for sure. We were speechless for a little while.
2 people like this
@nela13 (58491)
• Portugal
21 Oct 23
@JudyEv I would be too.
2 people like this
• Philippines
20 Oct 23
Oh, wow. You are blessed to find a lawyer like that. May God bless him.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
We have since found out he supports several charities and is very generous with his expertise.
2 people like this
@Beestring (14472)
• Hong Kong
20 Oct 23
The lawyer was really nice and generous. He certainly deserves a positive review.
3 people like this
@JudyEv (338657)
• Rockingham, Australia
20 Oct 23
It was hard to believe him at first. Lawyers here aren't known for their generosity.
2 people like this