Why some people are so hard to mend?

@sjvg1976 (42011)
Delhi, India
February 24, 2025 6:53am CST
I have a friend who is charming and easily gets along with the girls, and he thinks this is his strength. He uses them for his physical needs and thinks he is right. He may be right if he is not married, in my opinion, but as he is married, I think having a relationship with another person is not right. What's your opinion? I have talked to him several times on this, but he is adamant and hard to make him understand. I have left it for now on him.
12 people like this
12 responses
@grenery8 (15203)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
24 Feb
what an ungrateful man. i hope he doesn't have kids yet. karma will find him, i feel. stop talking to him and wasting your energy, he doesn't deserve it
3 people like this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
He has two kids. Yes, talking to him is certainly a waste of time and energy.
2 people like this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
25 Feb
@grenery8 No he loves his family that's what I guess while talking to him , the only thing is addiction of being physical with the women.
1 person likes this
@grenery8 (15203)
• Zagreb, Croatia (Hrvatska)
25 Feb
@sjvg1976 that is a sad cause he is a father too;he's showing no remorse or love to them.yes,it is. So sad.
2 people like this
@JudyEv (349436)
• Rockingham, Australia
24 Feb
Hopefully he'll get burnt one day and learn his lesson. I doubt there is much you can do to change him.
3 people like this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
That's right..but being a good friend I can tell him that the path in which he's going is not the right one. I wish his wife comes to know about it
3 people like this
@JudyEv (349436)
• Rockingham, Australia
25 Feb
@sjvg1976 That's good of you to talk to him but I doubt he would thank you for it.
2 people like this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
25 Feb
@JudyEv I talked to him but he doesn't want to change so I am not going to talk to him again in this matter. Let him do what he wante to.
2 people like this
@allknowing (143045)
• India
24 Feb
He is an adult and surely knows what is right and and what is wrong I would not interfere.
1 person likes this
@allknowing (143045)
• India
26 Feb
@sjvg1976 But you did not succeed
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
27 Feb
@allknowing Yes I didn't that's why I have restricted myself now.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
26 Feb
You are wise then but sometimes when you see a friend falling in a pit you must try to save him.
1 person likes this
@RebeccasFarm (93151)
• United States
24 Feb
Oh he seems to be lacking in the brain department but well endowed in the reflex department.
2 people like this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
Sometimes I also think so. It's difficult for me to explain things as he doesn't understand and always pretend that he's right.
2 people like this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
@RebeccasFarm Yes he is. I am not going to say anything to him because now he thinks me to his enemy.
2 people like this
• United States
24 Feb
@sjvg1976 He is doomed to being ruled by his reflexes.
2 people like this
@wolfgirl569 (113734)
• Marion, Ohio
24 Feb
His wife will leave him someday and then he might think about it
3 people like this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
Absolutely, that's what I tell him, but he seems to take things so lightly as if he knows he will never be able to get caught by his wife.
3 people like this
@Dreamerby (7500)
• Calcutta, India
27 Feb
@sjvg1976 I don't know if I had such a friend, I would block him from my life.
• India
24 Feb
Sounds like you are in a rough spot with your friend. He is not seeing any issue with his antics. People may have different boundaries in relationships. Once married, crossing certain lines does impact the trust and commitment they made. I agree with you using others for any needs while in a committed relationship is never right. Its admirable you spoke to him about his. It is unfortunate he is unwilling to hear you or change his ways. Perhaps time or experience will be necessary to change his mindset. I can understand why you left it now. There is less you can do when one does not listen to. I think you supported him as a good and supportive friend, but then there are times we are helpless. Take care!
3 people like this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
I completely agree. Being a friend I wanted that he should not go to the wrong way but now I realise that I cannot change him, only time will change him.
2 people like this
@DaddyEvil (144571)
• United States
24 Feb
Honestly? After mentioning it to him once, I wouldn't consider it my business after that. You aren't going to change the way he thinks or acts so either leave him alone and let him be him or stay away from him completely if you can't let him be himself... It will eventually catch up with him in some way and you don't want to be caught up in his problems when it does.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
I have let him live with his problems or happiness. I have now realised that I cannot change him , it's like an addiction for him and he is the only one who can leave it.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
26 Feb
@DaddyEvil absolutely, he is a toxic person and I have almost cut him off from my life from few days.
@DaddyEvil (144571)
• United States
24 Feb
@sjvg1976 That's true. I'm glad you realize he has to mend himself, you can't do it for him.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (224851)
• Walnut Creek, California
24 Feb
Our President says it's OK to cheat on your Mistress. So I guess it's OK. Can you tell I am kidding?
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
Hmm..Your president is a cheater and that's why people don't like him.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
26 Feb
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (224851)
• Walnut Creek, California
25 Feb
@sjvg1976 The poopy diapers could add to the disdain.
1 person likes this
@TheHorse (224851)
• Walnut Creek, California
25 Feb
It will catch up to him eventually.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
26 Feb
Hope so.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
26 Feb
@TheHorse Sometimes it doesn't work.
@TheHorse (224851)
• Walnut Creek, California
26 Feb
@sjvg1976 We shall see. Karma can take awhile.
1 person likes this
@Kandae11 (56010)
24 Feb
He will get caught soon enough.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
He is doing this from many years and still not caught. He is so cunning.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
24 Feb
@Kandae11 Yes and it should run out soon because he has been betraying his wife from several years.
1 person likes this
@Kandae11 (56010)
24 Feb
@sjvg1976 His luck can run out.
1 person likes this
@Dreamerby (7500)
• Calcutta, India
26 Feb
Oh my God!!! So, he is a serial cheater. He will pay back for this...if not in this life, in next life. Karma never misses an address.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
26 Feb
Who cares for next life, he should get in this for his karma.
1 person likes this
@Dreamerby (7500)
• Calcutta, India
27 Feb
@sjvg1976 Things don't work like that. But the karmic baggage will be there for the soul in next life.
@Neil43 (3676)
25 Feb
I think there are just some people hard to be in the same page with you.
1 person likes this
@sjvg1976 (42011)
• Delhi, India
26 Feb
That's true..some people think what they do is right.