EVERYTHING HAS A GENDER!!
@west_tx_goddess (1197)
United States
December 7, 2006 9:19pm CST
EVERYTHING HAS A GENDER
You may not know this but many nonliving things have a gender.
Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything
in, but you can see right through them.
Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it
takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effecti ve
reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed,
but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.
A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and it's often
over-inflated.
A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go
anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of
course, there's the hot air part.
Sponges are Female, because they're soft,
squeezable and retain water.
A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting
hit on.
A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old
lines to pick people up.
An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the
weight shifts to the bottom.
A Hammer is Male because it hasn't changed much
over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have
around.
A Remote Control is Female. Ha! You thought it'd
be male, didn't you? But consider this - it gives a
man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he
doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he
keeps trying!
12 responses
@west_tx_goddess (1197)
• United States
12 Dec 06
Now that one I am not sure. I would probably guess female because the world is dependant upon it for the completion of the smallest tasks....lol. thanks for the response!
@west_tx_goddess (1197)
• United States
12 Dec 06
Ahhhh but yet it could be a woman too because it is very complicated and hard to understand sometimes....ha ha
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
12 Dec 06
This one is Great. I had never heard these before either. I am tempted to print these out to share with others.
@inderjeetnogi (514)
• India
26 Dec 06
u r correct, i feel same about gender, it occurs in hindi also
according to hindi, (bus,train are female)
an aeroplane is a male
u can create a patent
@whitematter (501)
• India
26 Dec 06
lol really great, what about thia one
How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity
At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
Insist that your e mail address is: Xena-Warrior-Princess@OCDSB.edu.on.ca or Elvis-the-King@OCDSB.edu.on.ca
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
Dont use any punctuation
As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
Specify that your drive through order is "to go."
Sing along at the opera.
Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
Put mosquito netting around your cubicle. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.
Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won!", "I Won!" 3rd time this week!!!"
When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!"
Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."