Should a person stay in a relationship just because of a child?
By megs85
@megs85 (3142)
Australia
December 9, 2006 2:19am CST
Say I no longer am in love with my partner, but because we have a child together I stay with him, is this right or wrong?
Should a relationship be based solely on what is best for a child? Or would a child benefit more from their parents seperating rather than constantly fighting?
21 responses
@rebelmom13 (151)
• United States
10 Dec 06
I think that the best thing to do for the child is to separate rather than continuously fight. Being a single mother I know that it is possible to raise a happy child without a father. I am still madly in love with the father of my child, but he decided that he didn't want a baby and took off on us. My son is a very happy boy and he gets everything that he needs.
1 person likes this
@rebelann (112977)
• El Paso, Texas
20 Oct 19
That sounds so sad to me. But you did get the best part of your love, a child.
@chiragpgandhi (1388)
• India
9 Dec 06
why you ask this type of question,
1st thing i think about you that why you plan for child,
if you really not like (long relationship) then why you got child,
and now you have a child then you should stay with her,
because its not only her child it is yours also,
so i think you have to stay with her,
or you give time and money to your child and girlfriend.
bye,
sorry if i heard you,
have agood day.
@edelweiss (1929)
• India
10 Dec 06
Yes,
Giving birth to a child was a mutual decision.. wasn't it?
So, now it is mutual responsibility on both the parents.
@axe_effect (799)
• Philippines
9 Dec 06
hmm.. for me, what's the use of staying together if you no longer in love with your partner, but for the sake of the child. yes i do... i will agree that we will stay together for the sake of the child..
@daggi1712 (158)
• Germany
10 Dec 06
I did the same, and forgot myself as a woman for years, i was only "mam". i thought to do the best for my child.
but... he later asked me..mam, why didn't you change the situation much earlier? you are now a better mam, because you feel better yourself.
@shellyrios (1212)
• United States
10 Dec 06
It is wrong. This doesn't benefit the child. Kids pick up on that very easily. They're very receptive to tension between parents and sense when things are wrong. Body language says a lot too, not just words.....They don't benefit from seperation but learning to move on and heal from a broken heart is best to help them. They will be broken hearted that their parents aren't together and that's the painful part, but helping them cope is the best thing to do and ALWAYS tell them how much they are loved. I went through that with my kids, they get through it, it just takes time......
@domenyag (1273)
• Philippines
10 Dec 06
Why did you have a child if you do not love your partner.. That is not a game thing. YOu should make up your mind. Love is not a feeling after all. That is being unfair both to your partner and the child. If your partner Loves you, and you said you dont love him anymore,,, whoa... make up your mind. Do not be one of the broken homes in the world. You child might curse you someday.
@Glenn2007 (235)
• United States
10 Dec 06
How would a Father Suppotter 2 Household ?
his will need 3 Job for the Child and new g/f If his g/f got childrens already or maybe she got one on the way by him
@Bunny2 (2102)
• Australia
10 Dec 06
What dangermouse said! A child is better to have two happy parents who no longer live together, even though he might have to get used to living in two houses at different times. Living with two unhappy parents who perhaps are always arguing must take its toll and could have far worst consequences that having the parents divorce.
@meljessxena (2315)
• Australia
10 Dec 06
no way i would stay with him if i didnt love him, mainly because that make me unhappy and the child can feel your unhappy just going to make it worse later on for all of you
@adnan82 (672)
• Pakistan
10 Dec 06
i think u should continue ur marriage beacause if u guyz get seperate then . in the end u ll b happy but ur child will b really mentally disturbed..and could not concentrate on his/her studies n other social activities or may b he get in to some bad habits.
@matonly4u (17)
• India
10 Dec 06
hummm for the sake of the child, i would say tou have to be together.But the growing atmosphere of the child will be affected.
@0752620184 (220)
• Uganda
9 Dec 06
It's not good to break up for the sake of the child. If you have lost feelings for him,try to recall what made you fall in love with him in the first place, perhaps it can freshen your love for him or if he is a changed person now from how you met him, find time, sit down and talk to him in a kind manner, perhaps reflecting on the good times you had in the beginning.
@Lydia1901 (16351)
• United States
9 Dec 06
If you choose to do it then that's fine. Only the people that are in the relationship really know what to do in a time like that.
@Poison_Girl (4150)
• United States
10 Dec 06
Absolutely not. One should NOT stay with their partner just because they have a child together. It will only make the partner miserable, you miserable, and the kid miserable. If being apart and only seeing each other every so often around the kid makes the two people happier or get along better, than I think that that is what's best for the child.