Can a man and a woman be best friends or love will always invade?
By what_now
@what_now (554)
Canada
December 12, 2006 2:29pm CST
This happened to me second time now. One of my best female friends told me she is falling for me when she knows I have a gf and love her deeply. Isn't this wrong? even if she does, she shouldn't be telling me, knowing that I am not single. She just messed up the whole friendship too, I feel so awkward arround her now and avoid her. I now, seriously think a man and a woman can never be just friends love always comes in between. What do you think?
132 responses
@juicemilk (2283)
• Australia
13 Dec 06
I have lots of friends who are males :) A couple have developed crushes, but we always got over it...well I did at least lol
I think it is definitely possible.
Maybe you shouldn't be so nice and try to put on some weight and then she might not be attracted to you anymore hehehe
But I agree she shouldn't have said anything knowing that you were unavailable
@juicemilk (2283)
• Australia
13 Dec 06
haha and you didn't even notice :P
I was very very sneaky....
@killailla (1301)
• Canada
13 Dec 06
My best friend of 7 years is a man, nothing has ever happened, we are best friends nothign more!
@coolcager (496)
• Costa Rica
12 Dec 06
thats true. Bec. you open every secrets that you share to each other. and you know each other very well. and mostly both of you are always talking and thinking of each other. so thats natural.
@ecpunzalan (401)
• Philippines
12 Dec 06
I think she is just being honest, and there might be no other time to say what she feel about you. Acknowledge what she feels and move on. If she is just expressing herself that should not ruin your friendship but if she is trying to break you up with your gf that a totally different matter. Dont avoid her it is hurting her already that she cant have you, it will hurt her more if you avoid her. Talk to her and be honest to her taht you cant be together because you already have a gf. You would not want to hurt your bestfriend would you.
@wvchell78 (564)
• United States
13 Dec 06
I have always had several male friends. A few of which I consider to be my best friends. There has been one occurance that I dated one of these guys and after about 1 week we both were trying to figure out how to get out of it. We both decided that we were friends and that was it. I don't think your friend should have told you about her feelings since you are dating someone. It seems that she has ruined the friendship that you once shared. Have you spoken to her about this and told her you are happy in the relationship that you are in?
@ANKUSHGOEL (123)
• India
13 Dec 06
a man and a women can be best friends. the onlyproblem is u should have honesty in ur relationship
@charitymvula (489)
•
14 Dec 06
I think you can be best friends as long as you both have someone you are both commited to. otherwise I don't really think it would work. Well it hasn't for me, whenever I spend so much time with a male it usually happenes that feelings develop but they may not necessarily be acted upon for one reason or another but they are there!!! There have been times when they have been acted on and some have been a bad expereince and a great relationship was ruined but others were good relationships that did end but were good anyway. I just don't thinkit's possible, maybe with a staright woman and a gay man, that could work otherwise Idon't hink it is relaly likely.
@perfectkiller (341)
• Pakistan
13 Dec 06
i think love will always gonna invade b/w two friends of oppossite gender, coz i feel from the start our behavoir is diff with friend of opposite gender as compared with the same gender and it results in the invasion of love coz v show more care and concern for the other gender friends...
@kimwa69 (20)
• United States
12 Dec 06
I have spent most my life with males. Three older brothers I grew up with them and all their friends. I actually feel more comfortable with guys that I do woman. I also have had them fall for me even though they were in a relationship of some sort. But all have known from the get go I only wanted to be friends and although I was flattered of their feelings it would only be friendship on my part. I have numerous guys friends I hang out with and it's never been more than friends. My live in boyfriend knows me and never is upset if I hang with my guy friends. I'm a open honest and trustworthy purpose. The guys who had expressed their feelings some I don't see anymore because they couldn't get over it but others I still see them quite often. Hang in there it can be done!!
@classicaljazz (1628)
• United States
13 Dec 06
It can be complicated because there are emotions involved and yes it can get sticky. You have to deal with that and repair the relationship and you can get past this. My best friend is a man and I am married and we have discussed our feelings for each other that exist because of all that we share together. But I am married and my committment is more important to my friend than him and I being together. So we continue the friendship with love and respect for each other. I hope that makes sense!
@bonnielass (484)
• United States
13 Dec 06
I have plenty of male friends. Yes some do or did have feelings but they where put aside. If not we drifted away at some point. Yes man and women can definalty be friends for years without wanting more then just friendship. Im proof
@sanjivbiswas (334)
• India
13 Dec 06
NO THEY CAN NEVER BE GOOD FRIENDS BECAUSE OPPOSITE POLES ALWAYS ATTRACT EACH EACH OTHER ITS THE LAW OF NATURE.
@FreddyLim (161)
• Singapore
13 Dec 06
definitely not necessary... man and woman can be friend for as long as lifetime. however when such thing happen either way... guy fall for gal or gal fall for guy then I think the other pary should explain and clear things up. Sometimes its as a false illusion...
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