Abuse and motherhood, what do I do?

Hi, abuse is designed to make you feel guilty and bad. That is part of the abusers purpose with these hateful acts. I think (1) You should seek counseling for yourself to make yourself stronger and learn to trust yourself again. Many times you can find a Woman's counsel or abuse counselors in your city to give you free help. I did this and it helped me a lot. (2) You need to do what is best for your child. Deep down you know in your heart that he is no good for your child and you must protect her. The counselors can tell you the best ways to make this happen. Please get help!

take you baby and run away!!! at once !!! everything is better than these situation. my best wishes to you and you baby.

You must be kidding right? I was expecting by the end of this message to see a question asking how to save yourself and your child. Instead you are asking if it's ok to let him have contact with your child? Lady, I think he has done the damage to you already. You are sure he is going to harm you but you are not sure he is going to harm the child. First of all press charges for actually hitting you and threatening you. Tell them that he threatens the child's life. Come on! I was in the same situation. He looks like a sheep now (I know he is wolf underneath) but I'm sure my son and I won't have any danger. Save yourself and you child.

omg!! this is aweful!! ands yes you have rights in this case..first off you need to get a PFA against him..so go tot he poilce staion and get one and tell them whats happeing//now//do u want to keep your baby away.. u need a lawyer..i dont know what state u live in and your laws..but if u go for support it should be taken from them and they send you a check..and u sont see him..and if he comes near u he can go to jail for hbreakin the law..honestly..you have a great case agaisnt him..so plz talk to a lawyer,,and stay the hell away from him!! ok? plz keep me informed..

I fail to understand how you came to have a relationship with this man in the first place. If he already had a domestic violence case against him, you must have had some idea that he would be the same with you. Did you think he would trat you any different than his last girlfriend? If I were in your shoes, I would take the baby and run. When she is old enough, you could tell your child that her daddy was very ill and it was better for both of you to leave him. Hopefully you will meet somebody nice and you can put the past behind you. Good luck for the future.

i want to kill that %^*^#*^*@@@!!

can you maybe moove away?do everything you can to have a good life without him.dont go back.good luck

See the best thing would be if u report this matter to cops first as there is a great danger to ur life if u live with this person and to ur sweet little daughter as if anything goes wrong with u coz of him they can atleast save u So better id u take care of ur daughter and stay away from this beast and take care of ur daughter nicely give her love form my side too

well i think u should leave him immedately......i d suggest getting far away from him because such a man would definately be a problem 4 your daughter when she grows up

Oh, my dear, Yes, you should keep him away from her. He is really unstable and it is a miracle from God that he didn't kill you and her both when you were carrying her. You should, if possible relocate. I do not see how any court could give hin the right to see her unless it was supervised. Have you yourself ever brought charges against him? Take care of yourself and your baby. God bless you both.

u think he s nt safe for ur kid...is he safe for u?? how can u live wid a beast like him ?? just get divorced dear...and live a better live

you have to file a PFA againist him. my god, you are in danger and need to get away from him. I know it's scarey because of all his threats but you have to get a PFA and move somewhere safe, like with family. and never go out alone for a while or be alone.

Motherhood. There was a time when young girls dreamed of Motherhood! Sadly, today many young women are being brainwashed into thinking that Motherhood is some archaic uneducated endless waste of a life. After all most of their mothers abandoned Motherhood to pursue their career. There is something deep within the soul of a women to nurture children and many women have been stripped of that longing through incorrect teaching and training or even abuse. Motherhood is a noble profession. Motherhood is a great call in life. Motherhood is not a waste of time and further more, motherhood does not mean you are uneducated! On the contrary, mothers, of all people should be the most educated people of all---after all mothers are raising up the next generation. The next generation of Leaders! What kind of person will your child be? Who will he become? Are you teaching your children to love and obey God?

never mind mmm i now

I dont think he should have any rights till he seeks help. He is not in any mental condition to be a husband nor a father. The only thing he can do is pass on his abuse not love. Your doing the right thing with the restraining order. Its takes somebody strong. I come from abusive family so i know its hard to break a cycle but i have done it and I'm sure you will be ok too.

I'm agreeing with the others that say to move away. If for nobody else, do it for that beautiful little girl, keep her as safe as possible. I have not been through anything close to what you're going through and I know it's easier said than done to just pack up and go. But for both of your safety, be brave and do what you can. And it's best off that she does not know him, find you someone that will truely love you and your daughter, there are a few good guys out there that will love her as if she was his own.

i wonder y men do like dat i hate these type of guys who just try to keep running away from responsiblities...

Keep a written record of everything. Get a restraining order. Your child's life and your life are in danger. Do what you need to to protect yourselves.

From what I know of a friend's situation similar to yours, she was able to file to have his parental rights revoked. (she did have to give up child support though) But since you say he would end your life if you asked then no harm right? If you have chance please check out my post: http://www.mylot.com/w/discussions/436602.aspx

Oh my god!Pls far away from him!