what is your view on inter-caste and inter-racial marriages
By hcprasad
@hcprasad (1012)
India
December 16, 2006 8:05am CST
I think it is very difficult after marriage. Uptil marriage, due to emotions and having only one aspect of love, people get married. After marriage,the value of traditions, religious aspects and many in the society makes them difficult to lead life. Especially after the kids are born and joined to school, when kids are to be married, and further life looks miserable. I am hearing this from many of my relatives and friends. What is your experience.
2 people like this
28 responses
@chweetie (431)
• India
16 Dec 06
i am a person who totally agrees to inter caste marriages because marriage is the union of hearts and there is caste for hearts.it is the society that makes life dihhicult for them.if the couple is sure that they will united and will face problems together,then the society can do nothing about them.in cas of inter caste marriages there has to be adjustment.each one has to accept the partner's beliefs and should have mutual respect.
@kimikor (35)
• United States
17 Dec 06
I think it is fine. I know whether or not "society" is okay with it totally depends on where you live. Where I live in So Cal (the OC), it is no big deal. Biracial kids abound and no one really cares. My kids are half japanese and half Euro-mutt and young, old, black, asian, white, etc. always come up to us and comment on how cute our kids are. I think Orange County is a little more sophisticated and worldly than a lot of areas in the US and more tolerant of people's differences. That is the benefit of living in an area where what you drive is more important than the races of your mom and dad. My oldest has been asked to model a number of times for Quicksilver and other local surf Cos.
Look at how cute my two boys are in my photo :)
@plumwish07 (4057)
• Indonesia
17 Dec 06
I agree with inter-caste and inter-racial marriages coz in my opinion human has right to choose their life partner without limitation of caste or racial. I know it will be hard to do that but its not imposibl, right?
@kahheng (281)
•
17 Dec 06
If you ask me about 20 years back about inter-caste or inter-racial marriage, I would reply you differently that what I would reply you today.
10 years and I have notice significant change in the society. People today (esspecially those living in urban areas), are so much more open minded then they are 20 years back. Today, inter-caste or inter-racial marriage are being accpeted more widely.
As for difficulty, yes, marriage comes with a lot of challenges. Two people with different persnality and habits have to co-exist under one roof. Learning to tolerate each other's nonsence and bad habits. Yes, if the couple are of different race or caste, there are more differences, yet, if they love each other enough and are open minded enough to accept and adobt each others customs and values, it would very well work out. As for kids, again, if the couple repect each other and has discuss and aggreed on their plans to raise their kids, it would not post any problem at all.
I have a number of friends whose married partner are of different races, they are all happily married and does not show as much problems as some of my other friends whose partner are of same race as them. So, to answer you, no, I do not think inter-caste or inter-racial marriages would make it any more difficult as someone who are marrying into the same caste or race.
@boeyong (256)
• Malaysia
17 Dec 06
The only difficulty is marrying inter-racial is that of culture differences. Your spouse may suffer culture shock especially if either one of you come from a strong patriachal family with strong values in a certain direction.
Otherwise, it will be fine, if you can work with each other to iron out whatever differences you get along the way.
@shyam4uall (1002)
• India
17 Dec 06
I am very much in favour of inter-caste and inter-racial marriages..Because I think marriages are the gettogether of souls rather than any individuals..So it doesn't matter u belong to which race or caste and ur bride/groom belongs to which ...If u love each other and have better understanding with each other and thinks that u can live together..then its all done...
@bhaswarniyogi (255)
• Singapore
17 Dec 06
I do not agree with ur view...I myself is in an Intercaste marriage and I feel there is no probs in our marriage neither the society we live in bothers us...it just the state of mind..
@perfectkiller (341)
• Pakistan
17 Dec 06
well discrimination on caste and races is just rubbish i never believe in these things all humans r offspring of ADAM and no one has any superiority our sum1 else all r equal..
@ritusmathur2001 (39)
• India
17 Dec 06
Well... I think Other way round... I think it would be rather very eciting and interesting to get married in such a manner. One has then lots of opportunities to learn new culture, new life style and new perspective towards life.One might also get ample opportunities to see the wold.. who knows...?
The bottomline of such marriages is that there should be mutual understandng and respect for eavh opther and a willingness to be open towards each others ideas.
Many of my friends have got thus married and are doing well...
@rogue13xmen13 (14402)
• United States
17 Dec 06
I see nothing wrong with inter-racial marriage. If the two people make great money and love one another, then there is nothing wrong with that, as for inter-caste marriages, that is something that only Southern Americans do.
@SViswan (12051)
• India
17 Dec 06
The scenario that you have mentioned would occur only when the partners have not thought out properly about their differences. I know a lot of couple who had an inter-caste marriage and things are working out great for them. The main reason is because they see each other as individuals and work out if some of their ideals clash. All the couples have kids and have no problems interacting with either parent's extended family. Infact, the kids are at an advantage because they get to learn two different languages and get the benefit of two different cultures. It makes them more open to new things.
The only problems faced would be when one partner tries to stop the other partner from introducing his/her ideas to the child and tries to force their side alone on the spouse and child.
I live in a cosmopolitan city and maybe that is why tradition and religion might not be such major issues for such families (it's not a regular way of life but a random celebration). Maybe in a small town or city, inter-caste marriages might create problems like you have mentioned.
@jayanthiinba (245)
• India
17 Dec 06
Life is the first gift, love is the second, and understanding the third.
--Marge Piercy
So, according to me.. Understand the person u marry.. thaz enough to take life with happiness..
I do support inter-caste and inter-racial marriages.. I encourage it .. cuz, it will reduce caste n religions and all will stand united as whole!!Love grows by giving. The love we give away is the only love we keep. The only way to retain love is to give it away.
--Elbert Hubbard
So, u love with understanding n little adjustment.. Tat makes life happy..
Live life for u.. others neva live in ur life.. So, go ahead towards inter-racial n inter-caste marriages.. Why do u bother about society? U make the society.. Be proud marry someone of different caste,religion or race..!!
@vidyaa (14)
• India
17 Dec 06
everything in this world that is not made by god (or that is unnatural) has to vanish one day....castes are made by man...and marriage is blessed by god.its not that love marriages break....more than half of the divorce cases are arrange marriages/marriages within the castes and races....marriage is not an adjustment you make with your partner's traditions,its a bond you both make to respect each other,love each other and with with him/her everytime he/she needs you...talking about kids..let the kids think of this n if either of you thinks something it will be for his betterment coz you both are his parents...
@missy1 (104)
•
17 Dec 06
i am mixed race and my husband is white we've been together a long time and never had any problems as a couple so i thought everything would be ok,and it was until my eldest son reached 10yrs oldyou see all my kids take after their dad,white skin,blue eyes and fair hair,my son wanted to know what colour he was and all i could say was that he definately wasn't white and that he was mixed race despite the colour of his skin.does anyone have any advice on how to explain this to him.