How do you help yourself when you have problems?

Every problem has easy solution. We are responsible for problems, by making choices. When we make choice, we have to be preparing for all consequences. Sometimes it is not pleasant. Playing "poor me drama" won’t help. NLP programs are the best. I recommend it for everyone.

If I could type this in a very small and embarrassed type font I would, but I cannot steal and not tell; however I can steal and tell ;-) - I loved your crystal ball so much I added it to my pictures on my computer but I won't be so bold as to use it on MyLot. If you ask me to remove it I will; but I will be sad :-( ~Donna

I just keep my self busy and do something that will help me to enjoy myself, I dont want to think always my problem, it will make me sick.

Ah, Ha, What a wise question! As a practicing solitary kitchen witch and also a Reiki practitioner; this past year has been very difficult for me. I have been on disability for 7 years due to health problems (redundant?). This has been my worst. After a bi-lateral mastectomy 25+ years ago and Dow-Corning silicone implants chosen as my reconstructive surgery (I was young and it was important at the time!), 7 years ago the foreign objects began giving me severe problems. I could go on and on; but it boils down to the silicone has left me with multiple auto-immune disorders, each one more serious and painful than the previous. "They" were removed in 2005 - one was leaking and the other had ruptured. What was to be a 2 1/2 hour surgery turned into close to a 5 1/2 - 6 hour operation with the surgeon trying to dig as much of the hardened silicone as he could from my body. Sadly it has migrated throughout my system. Although I retain my spirituality, I am finding it difficult to observe some of the most minor of traditions; and my Reiki practice is all but non-existant. My attitude has become, if I cannot better cleanse and help myself, how then can I reach out to others with help. I am going to try harder every day until I can once again build up some momentum. I know that I know that the SECRET is giving back to the Universe, and I must quit complaining, stiffin up and GIVE! ~Donna

Yes, I have known people that do this and it drives me crazy! I just don't see what people get out of being so negative. Get up and do something! If you surround yourself with negative people, you will find yourself depressed! Btw, congrats on the big 500!

My mother does this all the time. She loses things on an almost daily basis and blames it on others, meanwhile almost never looking very far for what she lost, yet complaining loudly about it until the rest of the family get up and use up part of their day helping her look. It can be very tiring. But sometimes it is easier to help than just sit there listening to her get upset about such things.

I always have to talk through my problems and usually its my mum who I call. She puts me back on the right track. Also my daughter, who's now 17 is fantastic when I see a problem thats not really there. A woman I work with is always moaning about her life, her career, her child nearly everyday. I started a degree and she then decided she was going to do one. She kept moaning about not getting support from her boss and when she did not mentor her, to what she wanted, she dropped out, blaming her boss for her failure. I explain to her that I do not get any help and my mentor is useless, but I am doing this for me, so I get on with it, even though I do have a moan sometimes. Her daughter is always playing her up, but when I have tried to give her advise she doesn't want to know. Instead she blames the teachers for her child's behaviour. She sees herself as a victim, but she isn't. She has a job, a home and the intelligence to change her life if she so wishes. I now just listen to her but I do not try to help her, as I don't think anyone can. I feel she is very unhappy in her life and is more obsessed with what others are doing than waking up to changing her own life. Ooh, I got that one of my chest!!!

I either throw myself into my work (which is easy to do; I work at a laboratory) and push the problem below the surface, or I talk it out with someone I trust to get some advice or an objective opinion on what I am going through. My mother is the type who sits around and complains about her problems, yet never taking a step forward in resolving them. With people like that I lend a sympathetic ear and say supportive things, but I no longer let myself become emotional or too involved in their problems like I used to. Take care, Jenn