arranged marriage or love marriage???
By dihearted
@dihearted (2688)
India
January 1, 2007 2:27pm CST
hey ppl what do u think abt this????
arranged marriage or love marriage????
i go for love marriage bcoz i have a very loving girlfriend n i m sure that we gonna live lige together happily ...
but according to the indian culture n elder ppl opinion arranged marriage is the best ....
but as the time is changing many of the youngsters r getting attracted towards love marriage n many of them prove to b successful....
but u plz type down ur opinion abt arranged marriage or love marriage.....
which do u prefer the most?????????
8 people like this
110 responses
@nickhilll (14)
• India
1 Jan 07
well, well... the hot but virtually ignored topic this one. I personally would prefer 'love-arranged-into-marriage'. I say this coz it is very evident that you wanna choose the person for yaself, i mean you will know better what you want and parents in the scene should be capable of understanding the right. But at both ends, the discerning factor to good should be kept in mind though!!!
The final verdict. Love or Arranged or both of them is irrelavant, it would be such a blessing to marry the one you love!
Thank you :)
@noachide (162)
• India
2 Jan 07
I agree with you.
There is a concept called matchmaking(shidduchim, in Hebrew) -according to which, they try to find matches from among the eligible group, and then suggest the boy and girl to meet. Thus the emotions of the boy and girl are held back, and made to think more about the family they want to set up, and accordingly chose their partner.
Love can be blind, so so some intellect is to be added.
@jonezy (293)
•
1 Jan 07
can someone explain to me what is the good side to arranged marriages? i dont quite understand what the possible benifits are apart from tying two family bloodlines together...
im actively intrigued to know now..
in my point of view love marriage is the only way to go, marriage is a symbol to show the love between two people, what would be the point in the marriage if it was arranged and there was no love yet between the two people?
@ajay22 (300)
• India
2 Jan 07
Well in India we have the concept of arranged marriage. It means that your partners are not chosen by you but by your parents, the customs is that first the family of both sides checks out each other credentials than they match horoscope and than the boy/girl sees each other to check if they can like each other. Since western world does not have this tradition looks strange to them, I will just highlights some good and bad points of it:
Good Points:
1) You tend to discover your partner slowly, which prolongs the romance after marriage.
2) Since both the partners are new, so arrange marriage starts with respects towards each other, which later develops into love, and you tend to accept the likes and dislikes of your partner
3)because of arrange marriage you get to marriage normally once as no one like a divorcee, so automatically there is a lot of commitment in the marriage from both the partners to make it a success.
4) And ofcourse there is someone made for everyone so almost everyone gets their life partner and we have very less cases of "failing in love" and feeling dejected.
Statistics may surprise you but arrange marriage in India have a very high success rate. Ofcourse there are instances of failed marriage and not getting partners of the choice but that is in the case of luv marriage as well
@satyamss (870)
• India
1 Jan 07
the persons which get this chance its good to marry with ur lover! its good for our system based on creed, cast and descrimination....else no other way but arrange marriege...all remaining things such as failure off love marriege! i don't believe these things ,,,no one knows abt future....any thing can b changed...no matter is it love marrieage or arrange!
@vishal2800 (34)
• India
1 Jan 07
i personally strongly believe in love marriage cause if something goes wrong in arranged marriage its the parents who r blamed..but on the contradictory if something goes wrong in love marriage its solely ur own mistake with no one else to blame on this earth...
3 people like this
@sireesuccess (1254)
• India
2 Jan 07
i vote for both.u love and make ur parents agree to it and then marry.marriage is the one where every one should b happy.and while u love one person only u can know all his likes and dislikes and adjust urself with wat the other is .so we should but make ur parents agree to it.we the one who live the whole life with so we should marry the one we love.
@jaiganeshe2007 (134)
• India
2 Jan 07
Hey every one in the world like to prefer love maariage only, but it should be truthful, loving, caring and understanding of each other. And as you said most of the elder ones in our country never prefer for love marriages and if so its very few counts only. But day by day culture, fashion, understanding has improved more better and people should understand about love marriage also will be successful and you really should know that every arrange marriage doesnt success and every love marriage doesn't fails all the time.
1 person likes this
@shijjukhan (207)
• India
2 Jan 07
Hi....happy new year....according to me i prefer to arrange marriages......as they are best and i don't believe in present generation love.....as they are just attraction and infatuation....so i do prefer to arrange marriages...
and moreover i have seen many love marriages which are failure and not at all correct....they just spoil their lives in fake.....its completely my opinion and i don't force others.....good luck for you and your future life....
1 person likes this
@pufitza_mison (627)
• Romania
1 Jan 07
of course love marriage becouse i must live with that person not others.So if doesn't exist love then...i don't see the purpose of getting married.You must thinck that you must live with that person all your life so if you don't befit with that person than what would you do...bouth of you will be ruined.
3 people like this
@pri_mehra (64)
• India
2 Jan 07
Cheers for LOVE MARRIAGE!!!
I am in a relationship past two and half years,and I really love my guy!! I wanna be with him forever!!
But personally,even if I wouldnt have been a relationship,I would go for love marriage,because how can you marry someone whom you have known for just so little,that person good be fake,pretend to be good,just not be himself! I really dont go by the idea of marrying someone whom you dont know very well!! After all its the matter of spending your life with someone!!
At one point,my parents have had an arranged marriage,and they are going pretty strong!!!
So I guess,its all destiny!!
1 person likes this
@happyfeet (51)
• United States
1 Jan 07
Love marriage of course!
It's time to ban the arranged marriage!
I understand that the family wants to have a huge input on what you eat, what you wear, what you say, etc, etc. But when it comes to marrying, it's your choice, and it's someone that you are going to be spending the rest of your life with!
Why do elders think that arranged is best - because they had it???
They truly don't know what love and happiness is, but you will have the chance to find out when you get into a love marriage.
3 people like this
@runsgame (2031)
• India
2 Jan 07
hai . thanks for your nice go for love marriage - the reason u told is u have a very loving girlfriend . So , it is pretty good to call your marriage as arranged marriage instead of love marriage . the marriage partner is being arranged by U itself.
well, both makes no difference. here the parties concerned and their mind and understanding and over and all the grace of god and your ambitions of life and faith in this unverse ., like these so many factors are behind marriage.
Just love marriage and arrange marriage is not sufficient to achieve the target os the life created by God.
Any how , all the best and i wish u all success in your marriage with your very loving girlfriend. Show this message/discussions to your GF also .
@snakeyes (569)
• India
2 Jan 07
Well as of opinion we could have contrasting views on it,as we have already seen in the responses that most of the ppl are in favour of love marriages but i personally feel that arrange marriage is the best option b'coz in love marriage we normally tend to fall in love with the physical appearance of the human being rather than his/her soul,so we should try to look beyond the looks of the individual and then realise whether we want love or arrange marriage.
@chaitrakrishnan (181)
• India
2 Jan 07
I prefer love marriage than arranged marriage though its not our culture but its not a bad thing. You are not doing anything against your elders. The marriage and the things that are to be considered during marriage everything is going right except your spouse being of your interest. This whole process is going to take place only after the parents are convinced only. So i find no difference between love marriage and arranged marriage....
but one have to be careful wile choosing a life partner because you have to be with him/her for more than half of your life. For this to happen its better to go for love marriage though many of them are still happy after arranged marriage but this is not the case woth most of the people but only few...........
@anweshadas (372)
• India
7 Jan 07
I think both are equally important!
It should be a Love marraige which should also be an arranged marraige or it should be an arranged marraige which should turn into a Love marraige later on.
Generally the success rate of arranged marraiges is higher because we hardly know the other person over a period of time.We slowly get to know thw other person after marraige and slowly slowly fall in Love with them and this Love goes on for a long time.
In case of Love marraiges we must be already knowing the person from 3-4 years and after a few years of marraige sometimes Love begins to decay and that's why the success rate Love marraiges is not high{though not in all cases}
But its stupid to just marry someone without knowing the person beforehand.So in this case Love marraige would be better since we will be knowing the person.
I personally prefer Love marraige over arranged one
@sahyd2don (2942)
• India
2 Jan 07
Take elders opinion since they have seen life more than you.They will always want u to have the best thing in your life. Take the girl to ur parent and ask their openion if they reject her u should accept it.you can ask them the reason why they have rejected her if they do.
1 person likes this
