I Believe I am in Love! But She is elder then me.Should I tell her my feelings ?
By Xrated
@Xrated (3765)
Pakistan
January 5, 2007 11:16am CST
I am in Love but the problem is she is almost two years elder then me.
And I dont know how to express my feelings
I like her from last two years but I was trying to ask myself that I am not in love but from last 6 to 7 months I dont know what is happining with me? whenever I think of something she came in my mind !
I am always thinking about her
Now I think I have to express my feelings to her but I am not sure what she will think about myself coz she is elder then me.
I always feel while talking to her that she like me a lot she also talk about myself with her best friend and her best friend is also my friend and I know she likes me but I am not sure she love me or not plz tell me what to do I am very serious with her?
6 people like this
86 responses
@Mananitro (71)
• Malaysia
6 Jan 07
Depends on how old is she.. 1 year is not a problem.. 2 is still ok.. other then that not sure.. If no guts theres no use being in love.. trust me.. Love is never been easy...prepare for long ride
@sassyces (1602)
• Philippines
6 Jan 07
Two years is not much of an age gap so I see no problem with that. As for you being in love, well, you may or may not love her but the fact that you like her, then at least you have something to start off with right? You need not tell her that you love her right away, you can simply tell her that you like or like her very much and that's just about it. If you want to court her then go for it! At least you tried and you won't be spending your days in the future wondering what might have been if only you told her how you felt.
Good Luck!!=)
@maverickden (274)
• India
6 Jan 07
my friend if you do not say anything right now..
and later if you find out that this was your real love..
you would repent for your entire life..
do not give yourself a chance to say.. there could have been something between us if you would have tried..
;-)
@cuddleme01 (2725)
• Philippines
6 Jan 07
i agree. you should try telling her. speak what you feel. don't let it rot in your heart and head. age doesnt matter in love as the saying goes. who knows she might also feel the same feeling for you. you won't know until you tell her your feelings. So go, be brave and express your love.
@sural_78 (13)
• India
6 Jan 07
There are many persons who have married older woman. Recently the talk of marriage of Indian film star Abhishek Bachchan and Aishvairya Rai are going on. Abhishek is about 3 years younger to Aishvairya Rai. Even Mahatma Gandhi was one year younger to his wife Kasturba Gandhi. After certain age and mental maturity the age difference of 3-4 years does not matter much if other things viz liking & disliking, mental set up etc. are suitable one can go ahead for such relations.
@humaaaa (1386)
• Pakistan
6 Jan 07
Telling some one stright away that you love them doesn't sound pretty good and it would be uncomfortable for the girl to listen the three words
at unexpected time and from an unexpected person.
First explorer your self about love, are these your real feelings
or just attraction or lust
for the girl.
If you find out
its a true love for that girl.
Try and find out if she also loves you,
this is something a bit complicated.
Talk to her as much as you can,
share your precious moments and tell
her about your previous life.
Take care of her so much that she
gets habbitual to you and
definatly if she doesn't has anyone else
in her life she will start loving you.
Don't get hyper and over react, just calm first
and start exploring her.
@zotopec (307)
• Pakistan
6 Jan 07
well, xrated, I think you have said it yourself. Since you are very serious about her, it is only your least duty to your own self and to her to at least make an appearance. Even if she is sentimentally stronger than you holding her emotions back or procrastinating them, still you can make her face the reality and come out with it.
Psychology, the mother of telepathy, says that these are rays of thoughts which carry and work like a wireless walkie-talkie about a certain people. If there is stress in one's thoughts, the one about whom the thoughts are, is normally aware of the things. Dont you tell me that you have controlled your face in her presence, she already knows is my best bet, and bud, women are particular about these things. They intuitively know a mans expressions even if they were 10 year old. Go ahead, a woman is a woman, elder or younger, she needs love to be expressed and announced in her face outright.
@EvrWonder (3571)
• Canada
6 Jan 07
Hello Xrated, Your question is "What do I do". Please allow me to make some suggestions. First why not ask her to go for a nice lunch with you? Just go for lunch, maybe when she meets you at your place or you meet her at her place have a nice bouquet of flowers for her. Even if self picked wild flowers (the best).
When you are out with her at lunch do not, I repeat Do Not express your feelings at this time. Just have a nice casual lunch.
PS: Age is only a number and two years difference is nothing anyway.
If lunch is too much to start maybe just ask her to go see a movie or go for a walk with you and drop the flower idea. (woman love flowers and is a sweet gesture too)
If this choice is better, do not try to make a pass at her in the movie theatre.
The idea is to keep the first few dates casual. If after the third date, she is still reciprocating your invitations by joining you, then ask her out for a nice dinner. Take her somewhere romantic and quiet. By this time it will be okay to tell her how your truly feel and how you always think about her. She maybe flattered and she may even blush because maybe she is always thinking about you too.
Just move slow and when the setting and time is right take her hand and address her by her first name and just tell her that you think about her often and would like nothing more than for you both to see more of each other.
I have a feeling she will comply.
When you both are about to part ways for the evening, ask her if it will be alright if you called her the next day. Or if you have another great place to take her ask her out on another date.
Don't forget that she may be wanting to ask you out too and have some nice things about you to say to you too.
To break the ice is always the hardest part. From there it will be smooth sailing and perhaps you both will live happily ever after.
@raj0019 (2623)
• Argentina
6 Jan 07
I think you are in love with her, you got to know her side first. Don't hurry to express your feeling in front of her, if you do that suddenly she might get hurt, or she may misunderstand you too. Generally girl prefers guy who is older than her, but it is reverse in you case. SO, it will be a good idea to spend some more time with her, and let her realize your feeling herself. If she is not interested in your, then please don't push yourself in to sorrow. Consider all the possibilities before hoping for result.
@snakeyes (569)
• India
6 Jan 07
Well i guess this is the time when you should go ahead and muster the courage to speak your heart,it's you who has to take the initiative and as you are telling that her friend is also your good friend then i think half the problem is solved.It's only about one moment and then you can cherish that moment for a life time.
@maximus2006 (835)
• Hong Kong
6 Jan 07
wow,another friend falls in love with a girl! It does not matter if she is elder than you or not! The most important thing is that you really love her! I have many friends whose girlfriends are elder. It is said this kind of love is popular now.^_^.
Just have a try, otherwise she would never know your feelings. Also you would be always in the suffering if you don't tell her your love.
Good luck to you!
@wesker311 (508)
• Philippines
6 Jan 07
hi xrated! im two year old older than my boyfriend plus we had a child together! so what's keeping you from telling her what you feel about her? i mean you have all the right to tell a person what you truly feels about her or else you will end up with a heart attack!!!!if you feel and believe that she feels the same way also for you atleast give it a try or brake it to her gently so she wont be shocked?u know what i mean? she might be waiting for you to say the words first...
@hsiaochieh (29)
• Philippines
6 Jan 07
i suggest you to tell her because the issue here is the love that you feel not if she loves you also or not, when you love someone never expect in return although its rily hard to avoid that but that is love, you love her because that's what you feel and not because she loves you too, its better to tell her before its to late because you might never know she feels the same way too she's just waiting for you to propose, and besides she is also your friend dont hide anything from her because she might think that for all the kindness she have shown you are taking advantage of it because you feel more than friends with her and all her was thinking it was plain friends,, you know what i already had a relationship before and i am 3yrs. older than him and guess what we lasted for 6 yrs., age rily doesnt matter because its the love that binds you together, dont think she will not lyk you or love you back, be brave to tell her or show her how you feel and she will see your sincerity and that is the romantic scene she will ever see,just be true and for sure you will be happy with no regrets
@yorb24 (2179)
• United States
6 Jan 07
Well 2 years isn't really that big of a difference. Maybe to you now since you are only 18 but trust me, if she feels the same way, it won't matter. Is she involved with anyone right now? If not and you know she likes you at least as a friend, I think you should tell her how you feel. I don't feel it would ruin your friendship. I'm sure she values it alot. I hope it works out for you. Good luck!
@perfectstranger (727)
• Indonesia
6 Jan 07
My dear friend, I think firs thing you must know is..as a man you must be brave to take the risk if you're in love. If you love her, you gotta tell her. It's your responsibilities with your own feelings. The situation will get worse if you never have a chance again to tell her your feelings. Maybe if then she seeing someone. So, if there's a chance right now, don't wait too long to tell her. Tell her your feelings in the right way, in tender, in honesty, don't get rush when you saying it.
Whatever the answer after that, the most important thing is you have try and make a shot.
I think there's a lot of example out there that say that even age never limit love.
One think again to know that, a woman always be so clever to hide their feelings.
How if she hide her feelings from you too, and she still wait you for saying the words?
@thinkingoutloud (6127)
• Canada
5 Jan 07
It sounds like you do have strong feelings for this woman... and that's a good thing :) Don't let her age cloud your judgement. I am 12 years older than my husband and we are very, very happy together. Focus on your feelings and what you want her to know, rather than focusing on how old she is. As others have said, two years is nothing! You don't have to "be in love" right away... let her know that you care for her and that you would really like to get closer to her and ask if she feels the same way. You'll never know for sure until you ask :)
@Xtauseef (158)
• Singapore
6 Jan 07
well it seems like the boy is in love :) she is just 2 years older i dont think she will even care about u being 2 yr younger......the thing is ur in love.....its better u tell her now before she is somebody's else........who cares if she says no....atleast u tried......n let me tell u if u dont confess now n in future somebody tells u or she tells u that she had feelings for u.....u will just hate urself......which aint good at all.......before saying it to her make an environment and then confess......i pray its yes.......peace