expecting too much from our children

Really good to hear that ,but personally i feel from my experience the students with god-gifted intelligence and smarter brains must strive to achieve their best utilizing their full potential and talent rather than throwing away due to laziness ,carelessness,lack of zeal and enthusiasm ,since later when they grow old they need not repent abt the fact they didnt work hard when they were young and hence could have achieve more as compared to present.....I would personally suggest u to motivate ur kids to the fullest extent even if they are brilliant ,who knows tomorrow they might create history?????

I don't have children myself, but as a rule parents often want better for their children than they had for themselves. Parents also want to see their children reach their goals, sometimes thinking that their children will share their goals and losing sight of the fact that their children may have very different goals. A parent can push a child to succeed as sports, education, career goals, social activites, etc. just because they are important to the parent and not the child. The child can become frustated and begin to resent being forced to participate in these activities (not always - it can sometimes generate a real interest). However, when a child lacks the ability to do some of the things a parent is trying to force them into it becomes a real problem. The child can end up feeling that they just don't measure up and are seen as a failure. This can destroy their sense of self-esteem and can lead to failures in areas that they have real talent in or cause them to believe that those strengths are just weaknesses. It is great to encourage your children and want the best for them, but we need to keep that in perspective and keep in touch with our children's feelings.

I know what you mean. My son could read and do his alphabet from a young age too. I taught him all of that...and read to him every night. When he started school he had no problems. I think that you want the best for your kids...and maybe more than you had...so you do tend to push. Although...I think a little nudge once in while doesn't hurt either. We have tried to instill good ideas and judgement to him. He has had some problems in the past...with grades...getting in trouble..etc. However...he now started high school and seems to have turned around. His grades are great...and there have been no problems. I think that they will learn eventually but may fall along the way...It sounds like you are doing all the right things...congrats...and good luck.

I say that your son being 2 1/2 and knowing all his ABC's and how to count to 10 forward and backward is GREAT! if he learned it from sesame street good let him watch more! I like to work with our kids and that..I think when you are pushing to hard is when you trying to teach them something and they arent understanding but yet you get mad about it. I think if your just teaching him things and hes catching on then thats fine.. or teaching him things and hes not thats fine too.. just dont push so hard to where its not fun, you know when counting use m&ms or you know something exciting so that learning doesnt have to be borin gyou know... Use cars to count or whatever he is interested in. I want to teach my kids their ABC's ,How to count, and many things before they get in to school.. but im not going to get angry if they dont catch on, And im going to try in make it fun you dont want to burn them out before they get in school they ahve a loong time in school.

I believe that any parent want that his kid be better than he was.Sometimes,I see the same thing at my parents,they allways want that I became better then they are or better than other children.Maybe parents belive that is never to match.

don't push yet not at this age. keep playing educational games and letting him watch educational television. my daughter atarted talking at 9 months by 1 1/2 years she knew her ABC's and had a full vocabulary. her grandfather does alot of workbooks with her, she is now 5 and in kindergarden.she can read easy books count to 100 do simple math write out simple sentences and she has a vocabulary like you and me. her teacher told us she's a brilliant child and she's never seen another kid like her. but nobody pushes her if she wants to do extra reading or workbooks then we help her if she's satisfied after her assigned homework is done then thats fine. kids learn at there own pace nomatter how hard you push them, and if you push them to hard they may come to hate work when it comes time to go to school. it's great that your son is ahead of schedule but don't push him to learn more. focus on what he already knows and find simpl way to get him to go alittle bit farther. like sit and sound out the sounds that each letter makes even if he doesn't seem to be listening don't force him to. it's kind of like ourselfs when a song plays over and over on the radio over a period of weeks. Even if we are not listening to every word eventually we will be able to sing along. same goes for the kids.

My 17 year old daughter says I push or expect to much out of her. I guess I just want her to have a better life. I pushed all my girls. My oldest is in college and only has two semisters left. I just hope she uses her degree that she will be getting. My middle daughter is going back to school to become a nurse. She learned the hard way that she should have went right after high school but chose to do her own thing. (Boyfriends and work) Now she is regretting that she never went to college. I'm really glad she is now. My youngest I keep pushing to get better grades so she can do post secondary next year. (She would have a year of college under her belt if she does, and the high school pays for it.) She says she's under to much pressure from us. I told her to do what she wanted. High School only comes once in your life. Enjoy it. I am really pushy when it comes to sports. I really wanted them to do great and get scholarships. They keep telling me to stop. I have gotten better with that. I guess I just need to relax a little bit.

With increasing competitiveness in the environment and to do best than the better..the childrens are feeling the heat on them.I don't think compling anyone to do anything in which he is not interested with yield a good result..be it sports or study.We have to leave it on them but side by side we have to see that they doesn't take it in other way and indulge themselves in wrong activities..So I feel motivate them and be with them in every moments of their life be it a winning moment or a lossing moment..

Needs and awareness have changed with the changing times.Earlier parents were not so aware of their role in their kids education.They used to think that their duty was to put their child in a good school,pay the fees,help them in getting ready for the school everyday and prepare tiffin for them.But nowadays like you ,other parents too want their children to excel in studies and other extra-curricular activities for their all round development and to help them achieve thier optimum potential. I don't think there is any harm in doing so .only, we should know where to draw the line.Your kid is only 2 1/2 years old.Right now you should let him be and watch keenly as to what are his plus points and interests.Maybe after a couple of years you can guide him to identify his interests and aptitude and create interest in his studies and sport and should continue till the child is happy doing it.I think a parent should never burden a child with their own ambition and hence should never give opinions about what the child should aim to strive to be.Let the child him/herself decide what he/she wants to become.Your role should only be to encourage and provide facilities for your child to achieve his positive goals. Wish you all the best in your endeavour.

I try to not push to hard. I expect them to do their best. I do stay involved in not only in their school work, but also any extra activities they do. I think it is to much when you do not allow your child to do anything they enjoy. When it gets to a point where all you ever focus on is school work. There has to be a balance.

I try to find a reasonable balance with my kids. As soon as they get home from school, they have to do homework before they can do anything else (I help if they need it) and I constantly tell them that if they do well in school they can be anything they want to be. They never feel pressured and are both flourishing in school (my 8 year old daughter in now in the gifted student program at her elementary school). I just want them to do better than I did as I regret my lacklustre performance in school. I am an intelligent person (don't mean to brag), but I just didn't see the point of a lot of stuff that was taught.

Great job with your son. I don't think you can ever push your children too much. Education is very important and you need to push them to do good and achieve their goals in school. Without the proper pushing especially early in school, they will have a hard time in high school and college. I try to push my children all the time. I think you are doing a great job, keep it up.

I have to say it all depends on the child. Yes parents should push and stay involved in their childrens shoolwork. But how hard depends on the child. Our daughter is a smart girl but getting her to do her homework, she would much rather argue then get it down. We have had calls from the school becaused she has argued with the teachers about how unreasonable she thinks the asignment is. And because she dosn't want to do her homework her grades are not as good as they could be. On the other hand our son is crazy ( not directly ment;-)) he loves doing homework reading books writing short stories. And this we don't want to take away from him. He was three when he could his ABC's and count to ten. Now he helps his sister with her math homework. But his handwriting. I'm glad I don't have to read it. He has to become a doctor for it. hi hi hi. So basiclly encourge your child and guide them in the rigth way. You can feel when it is to much.

I think sometime parent want to see their kids achieving things in life what they were not able to achieve in their life. But this sometime leads to excessive pressure on the kids. I can remind my father expecting me to become a engineer and so i did what he told me to do and got a undergrad degree in engineering. But during my engineering i realised that i was not meant for engineering and i was able to change my life by leaving the course. But not everyone get second chance in life. I think parents should just act a facillitator and they should just help kids with what making them informed decision rather than taking the decision on their behalf. They should not force them in doing what they want them to do.

It's frustrating when children have so much potential but seem to be wasting it away. It seems like the best way to get them to advance is to challenge them, then praise them when they rise to the challenge and do well.

I grew up the same way. and I too regret not takeing my schooling more seriously.I know I could have achieved what ever I put mind too. I also regret that my parents didnot take my schooling to heart, then maybe I would have.

I think it is too much when you are unable to accept your sons best efforts unless he is #1 or better that the rest of his peers or age group at something. Just continue to love him for what he is, and encourage him to do his best. We all want our children to excel at things... I think everyone has their talents, just encourage and help him to find his.

I think it's too much when they start to stress out. If a young child seems stressed, then something is wrong. I try to push my son to do the work to his potential, but not to the point where I'm sounding like a drill sargeant. I always had to work hard for the grades I got, and my parents, like yours, weren't too involved in my education. I try to know what he's doing every day and touch base with his teacher periodically. But when reading or doing math, if I notice him getting frustrated, I don't push it anymore. He's only 8.

i am stating an opinion as a child who has a father like wmaharper. my father was an intelligent student. worked hard to complete his education. he could not go to an engineering college as my grandpa could not afford that. now he wanted us( my siblings and i) to work hard and achieve things which he could not. little realizing that i had no interest in science, he forced me to join the stream. i know he meant good and i respected him too much to say no. but those two years were a disaster. i somehow managed to get through, but switched to literature later.....and pretty well. i don't blame him for being a hard task master.....but i regret the fact that i could not enjoy those years and was under terrible strain. just let kids be kids. they will have enough time all life to struggle and fight. too much of education can ruin an individual....i say individual-that is to say overall personality of a person. one might become irritable, overpossesed with work or education and even turn out to be like you (i mean the parent)

MY LIFE IS VERY MUCH SIMILAR TO U.MY PARENTS DONT CARE ABOUT MY STUDIES BECAUSE I AM A BRILLIANT STUDENT.BUT SOMEONE MUST BE THERE FOR US TO ENCOURAGE US AND TO PUSH US FORWARD.IF THIS HAPPEN IN MY LIFE I MAY BE STILL A BEST PERSON.OFCOURSE I AM YOUNGER THAN U THAT EVEN I DIDNT GET MARRIED ALSO,BUT I WANT TO SAY U TO ENCOURAGE UR SON.BECAUSE ENCOURAGEMENT GIVES US ENERGY TO BE SUCESSESFUL IN LIFE