Parents, teach your sons to be a gentlemen.

Which way do you want it? What is "treating like a lady" when if all things are equal it should be just 'treating like everyone else.' Some women assume guys should open the door for them, some don't care, and some think of it as a sign of superiority or as against the feminist movement. About being "checked out," good luck... its about as natural as a bird song. I'd recommend something like the work of Desmond Morris for some interesting information about this. I'm all for equal rights, I'm all for fair treatment and equal pay... but for anyone to think that there aren't fundamental differences between the organization and actualization of male and female brains is absurd. That said, I feel what you are really after (and forgetting that it goes both ways because I can just as easily talk about how superficial and lazy women can be when they get everything handed to them) is what I described as equality in the sense of polite, respectful interaction.

i think that the best thing you can do for equality is to raise you BOYS to be GENTLEMEN and your GIRLS to be LADIES! guys may not be "hootin and hollerin" if gals werent lookin like they want the attention.. door swings both ways right? and yes i DO think its the responsibility of the parents.

You have included "appropriate language" and "giving up seats" as to how a woman should be treated by a man? Appropriate language seems to be more relevant to age group than it does to gender. I speak freely, as that is my right, and I would hate for any man to second guess his words simply because I am present. The concept of giving up seats also seems to be an age related issue - everyone should be willing to give up a seat to anyone with a handicap, a small child in tow, or an elder. It seems that you're really asking why people can't treat each other with the mannerism of years past. With more equality comes less of that, as we have progressed to be more competitive in nature. If I am the first to the door, I hold it open for whomever is behind me. I thank the person that holds the door for me. My language and topics vary by relationship, and my language publicly is mostly tame, out of common courtesy to strangers (especially if there are children present). I show respect for my elders, but also expect respect from them - it used to be that elders held more knowledge, and that is not necessarily the case anymore. Age brings life experience, but not always know-how. I am 20, and my 21-year-old fiance acts much the same as I. I know that we are not alone in our courtesy, though I do agree that many people have lost it. As a society, we started demonstrating less manners when it appeared that we could no longer trust there to be a general good in a stranger. Perhaps people should quit lying, mugging, stealing, cheating, scaring, stalking, kidnapping, raping, and killing. Why should there be courtesy where there is no trust?

I have raised 4 sons and they so that they respect their elders and most importly they respect me and I raised them not to hit a woman what ever the situation

i so agree with you i have a boy and i always make a point to teach him to be respectful and polite now only to women but everyone. now a days men do not treat woman appropreately

I will not teach my son to be a gentleman in the accepted usage of the word. He will learn that all people have value regardless of gender. He will learn to behave respectfully in all company, male or female. He will learn to give up seats to those who need them, male or female. Do you see where I'm going with this? The traditional "gentleman" treats people differently on the basis of gender. Even if it is meant to be positive, it's still a gender-biased viewpoint. I want to teach my son to be a decent person, who helps others and treats them with respect. Not just women, but all people.

How about teaching sons to treat women as equals? Like don't see women as objects of lust, see them as people. Personally I find it more offensive for a man to give up his seat for me or talk to me differently than he would his other friends than "checking me out".

I think it has always been the job of the parents to teach the manners, unfortunately I think a lot of men think that when women asked for equality they gave away theirs rights to be treated well...it is sad.

It definitely is the parents responsibility. I do believe in women's rights. But f I went out with a man I would still ike the hand into the automobile, the door opening and all that. It has been 12 years since I have dated but the men n the town I live in just do not appeal to me. Plus a lot of years of bad experiences kind of soured me on relationships. However,if Nicholas Cage, Sean Connery, Steven Seagal, or John Cusak came along, I might change my mind. I don't think it would happen in Greensburg, Kansas USA but I can dream, can't I?

While I agree with what you have said, I must take issue with the fact that fathers should have the main role of teaching manners to their children. The problem,as I see it, is that young ladies just do not know how to respond to this type of response. I have seen some actually say in a rather snotty way "I can open my own da** doors." And they don't even have the decency to say "thank you." This is not a one way street.

Yes. It is the responsibility of the parents to see that their sons are on right path. Discipline starts at home only.

i realize that women rights have moved to a new level that i saddened to see that the male species has loss most of its manners when it come to how to trea a lady

I will say that womens rights is a has a lot to do with the reason that fathers ahve put manners on the back burner when it comes to raising their sons, fortunatley I am not one of those men, I was always taught to be a perfect gentlemen from my father and have instilled these values and beliefs onto my sons and can only hope others will come to their senses and do the same.

Yes, I was raised on proper values and morales and how to be a gentleman, not just around the laties but over all in general. I have seen they way that the boys act and dress these days and it leads me to think that few of us know the meaning of the word gentlemen these days and the signifigance it holds. I pride my self in knowing that my sons are gentlemen form their behaviors down to the way they dress, they look the part as weel as acting the part and hopeful will influence others to take notice and become one as well.

It's not allabout teaching how to treat a woman as a lady. It's about jusy plain manners whether it's a man or a woman. To me that is more important. A lady should be treated as such. If a gentalman wants to give me his seat i will take it as a curtsy to him. he is being thoughtful. woman want to be treated as though they have minds. but accepting of these things is a sign of that respect.

I agree. It's so refreshing to see a man go around to the passenger side of the car and open the car door for the woman and help her get out of the car. Where have all those men gone?

Yes we need to teach our children more manners. Not just the boys. The boys need to understand to open doors and be respectful of all women. My son at 14 opens doors, carries bags and gets up from his seat for a women or a girl. But I also teach my girls that you need to also get up out of respect for the elderly or someone who is just older than you are. Open doors or help somebody that needs it. We as a country are losing our compassion and I think if we all show our kids that it is important maybe we can change things

It should be the parents responsibility to teach their children manners. The things I hear coming out of children's mouths these days. It's enough to make me blush. Such swearing, such rudeness. I remember when I was young, we had to say yes sir, never yeah. We felt the back of their hand if we called grownups by their first name. Teach your children, they learn from you. They repeat what they hear. I like having the door opened for me, pull out my chair for me. Please, no foul language around me. My eyes are in my face, not on my boobs. Please lets show some respect. What happened to women being cherished, respected?

As a member of the society, we have the responsibility to monitor the curriculum of the school. Basically as parents, we are the role model of our children, teaching children the good morals and values do start at home. Thus, we have the obligation to guide them and correct them when they made mistakes. Respect for elder people and women. Of course, we have to put our teachings in action so that it will instill in their minds. But our teachings shouldn't end up in the house. As a responsible memeber of the society, we have to form a group, like a parent's group, wherein we monitor the activities of our children when they're outside the home environment. Like the school and peer's club. We have to constantly check the learnings of our children and the way they manifest their learning in their daily lives.

i think no! it is a choice of your son to do the right things. what ever you thought him if he don't like it you can not force him to do so especially if you are not around.