Empathy vs Sympathy - I Get It Now!
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
United States
February 6, 2007 5:41pm CST
First let me start by saying that I never have understood the "star". I didn't know what it's meaning is and I still don't understand the "rating system".
From a post that I read yesterday, I kind of got the idea that everytime your discussions/comments get marked negatively you run the chance of losing merits on your star rating.
When I started posting on MyLot I went from no star at all to a red star with a 9 in it the first time I noticed a star above my head.
Mercy me, I must have stepped on someone's toes because I got up this morning and now have a sunshine yellow star with an 8. Whoops! I'm sorry!
For all that have been writing about how their star ratings have dropped only to have risen again, I now truly understand how you felt to see that drop. It is no longer a matter of thinking how you must have felt - I actually "feel" your pain. I trust that I too, just like you, can rise up like the phoenix from the ashes, and bring my score back, not only to a 9; but dare I hope to say to a 10!~Donna
18 people like this
32 responses
@shywolf (4514)
• United States
7 Feb 07
I am giving you plusses, and I really hope that you get your star back up there. I am also one who has been struggling to get my star rating back up for awhile now, and I am frustrated all over again and hurt that someone did this to me and I still do not have a clue who or why they were upset with me, as I really am not fond of even stepping foot into controversial discussions and I try to be as friendly and helpful and kind as I can. I'm not trying to blow my own horn, I know that I have beliefs and values that some people might not like, but I would never mark someone minus just because of their beliefs. I actually find it very hard to mark anyone with a minus, period, unless they are cheating, in which case I should really be pressing the ! key instead.
Anyway, I hope that you and I both get our ratings back up there soon!! I really feel your pain.
9 people like this
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
7 Feb 07
Shywolf, Please don't be sad and hurt about this! I wrote my discussion kind of tongue-in-cheek. No matter what kind of forum you are in, there are always going to be people that disagree with you - and that's alright! You are a sweet person and don't start controversy (I don't mean to, but I know that I do manage to say things that bring out strong emotions in others at times). This is what discussion is all about. It is something that gives us an opportunity to give and take; and hopefully learn and grow. Please let your spirits lighten. You are too kind to be so down. ~Donna
6 people like this
@shywolf (4514)
• United States
7 Feb 07
Thank you! You are very sweet!! ^_^ I really wouldn't mind so much if it didn't affect my earnings. This is really the only site I can find nowadays to make much money with, and online is the only means I have of making money, so whoever hurt my rating hurt me far, far more than they guessed they were doing when they did it. But I do love the site, heck - I've said before that even if I don't get paid, I won't feel like I've wasted my time. Especially in this last week, starting a couple topics here has been the best part of my day, receiving support from wonderful people in the Mylot community has _really_ helped to cheer me up. ^_^
2 people like this
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
7 Feb 07
I believe I will soon be joining you at an 8. I check where exactly my rating is, and I'm at 90/100. One more point drop and I'm down to eight! I can't imagine you stepping on anyone's toes, however. I'm the offensive one! ;) I always rate you positively - you're eloquent, entertaining and post things worth reading. Whether it be a discussion or a response. You're a wonderful contribution to this site and a wonderful friend.
I've given up trying to figure out the exact formula for star ratings. All I know for sure is that when I was a ten, my earnings were much higher than they are now. Not that it matters that much to me - as long as I'm selling my articles I don't have panicked fits over money - but it does make me think.
Though I attribute my drop to the fact I upset someone so badly - despite never responding to them or having them respond to my discussions - that they waged a small war against me, complete with discussions centering around what an evil person I am.
Silly people.
7 people like this
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
7 Feb 07
MissK, I don't understand what 90/100 means. If you would not mind, and you come back and read this, will you message me to explain this system? I'm not worried, this post was as usual tongue-in-cheek. Thank you for all the the great things you said. It put a smile on my face. ~Donna
1 person likes this
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
7 Feb 07
my sympathy to you then..lol..well as what i have understand on the rating its also means how active you are here in the net...and i dont know that giving a negative rating to somebody will make it decreases..have you pm the admin about the decrease and ask why?? maybe you should...as for me ive been at 8 first and just last week been raised to 9 star...
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
7 Feb 07
Thanks for the sympathy vanities; and no I haven't questioned the administrator. I'm sure they have better things to do than worry about my star ratings. Congratulations on your jump to a 9! ~Donna
@dopey22girl (3319)
• United States
7 Feb 07
I haven't yet experienced where my star rating has dropped, however I have experienced where it went up. But now I am a little afraid of it dropping; I hope nobody marks my discussions as negative! But I guess that's what happens with controversial discussions. I'm sure you will get your star up to a 10 in no time. Just be very very active on Mylot!
3 people like this
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
7 Feb 07
For some reason I don't think you are too Dopey! Thank you for your comments and response ~Donna
@gemini1960 (1161)
• Philippines
7 Feb 07
im still new here , but ive got a 7 star rating...active participation here counts on their rating system, but i havent expererience yet on marking a negative discussions or responses yet...does it really make it go down??thank you for the additional information...
4 people like this
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
7 Feb 07
Gemini, congratulations on your 7! No one has ever really explained the "rules" to me so I can't give you the information you want. I wish I could help more; but it looks as though you are headed in the right direction ~Donna
@flagbabygirl (891)
• United States
7 Feb 07
Yes I got a star today You get your star after your first 100 posts, Mine only had a 6 in it! I guess thats because I like toi answer the Highly volitile questions you know the ones that piss people off! My answers I am sure are not what they want to hear!
4 people like this
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
7 Feb 07
You go girl! 100 posts! That's fantastic! I would try going to the "hot topics", but I prefer sticking with the discussions my friends start. If I ever get to the end of them, I will go to the hot spots and pi$$ people off ~donna
1 person likes this
@ElusiveButterfly (45940)
• United States
19 Feb 07
There are so few that I give a negative rating to anymore. The responses that members are making are actually becoming more than the one or two word responses. I will give a negative rating to anyone that does that. If the response has no depth to it such as "yes I agree with you" or "very good discussion", they will receive a negative rating. I do not understand why people negatively rate a response based on simply not agreeing with what was said. If the response was well thought out it should be given a postive rating.
Your discussions have always received a postive rating from me. You always put much effort into your responses and discussions. Huggers to you....Sarina
2 people like this
@shooie (4984)
• United States
7 Feb 07
I myself don't worry about the star I am sure mine will drop soon because have been taking days at a time away from coming into mylot. I just needed a break from here. The only time I give negative remarks is if I post a discussion and some one post an answer that is totally not what the discussion is about. Tehre are players in here and well if they don't like ya they are going to go after you and have their friends do it as well and start marking negatives nad that is sad.
2 people like this
@mom2chriskel (1060)
• United States
7 Feb 07
I think you will be back up before you know it. I know I enjoy reading your posts and discussions. Just keep posting and don't let your star rating bother you too much!
2 people like this
@babykay (2131)
• Ireland
7 Feb 07
ha ha - I know how you feel...I used to be a blue 10 but I have sllipped back to a red 9 somehow! Too many commenting on emotive topics I think. It could encourage people to only comment on "safe" topics. One problem I see with the star system though I don't know what the remedy is, is that people will rate you according to whether they agree with your argument rather than the quality of it.
2 people like this
@kathy77 (7486)
• Australia
7 Feb 07
yes I quite agree with what you are saying here as I must of walked over someone as from today I went from a 10 to a miserly 7 yes I bet you know the feeling as well I have been on here and do my work daily here responding, discussing and giving people best response but someone must be did not like my discussions on here or response so now I have to build it up again. I am working to make my star rating back to a 10 as well.
3 people like this
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
7 Feb 07
Chriss, Just look at your number 1001! Wow, you saved that number for me!!!!! Thank you so much!!!! Much love ~Donna
1 person likes this
@nelltx (277)
• United States
7 Feb 07
I want a star!!! My widdle fingers are sore from typing! I am a hunt-n-peck typer so it takes me some time to get through all of this. I try to be diligent about rating responses to my discussions & answering others, but I wanna star!!!!! LOL
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
7 Feb 07
Thank you very much for the comment and response. I know that counts for something ~Donna
@tendaheart2002 (495)
• United States
20 Feb 07
It is true I think everyone with a star rating worries about whether or not there star rating falls. To me it almost seems like an indication of who agrees with your content and who doesn't agree with it. See you are back up and I am sure you will be at 10 in no time. Good luck! Keep making great posts :)
1 person likes this
@hockeygal4ever (10021)
• United States
8 Feb 07
I think it also depends on how much posting you do. I know that when I didn't come on for a few days my rating dropped from 10 to 9. So I don't think it's based just on the plus and minus system.
@coolcatzz (1587)
• Canada
11 Feb 07
When you noticed your star for the first time was probably when you hit 100 posts. I believe that is when it starts.
I started at a 9, went down to an 8 and now I'm back up to a 9. I should say it doesn't matter to me but it does. I guess I always strive to be on top and do my best. But having said that one of my friends told me that there are people in here that will deliberately give people with high ratings negatives to bring all those ratings down. Now she is not the only one who has told me that. So now that I know that I try to not worry about it.
@destinycole (827)
•
12 Feb 07
Yes Donna, it happened to me! I went from 9 to 8 whoosh! and really I thought what the heck! okay so some people don't like my posts well tough luck on them.
Guess what its a 9 this morning [laughs to self] for how long I have no idea and do you know what I don't care. If people to rate me negatively that's their business, the truth hurts and if I made someone mad because I spoke my mind so what.
Good luck getting your 9 hun.
@awonderfullife (2893)
• United States
12 Feb 07
Yeah, I don't get it either. ButI try not to think too much about the star system, beacue I don't want it to prevent me from repsonding to discussions as I normally would. When I see someomne with a 10 rating I assume they must be a very active user, who posts and responds to a lot of discussions each day. I wonder if soemone goes on vaaction for a week, will their rating drop?
1 person likes this
