Shyness - have you ever been told you are shy?

I am extremely, incredibly, painfully shy, to the point that it would be strange if someone did not notice it. So I had never considered feeling hurt about someone pointing it out to me. Shy is how I would define myself, plain and simple, so if someone were to say that I weren't shy it would be more of a shock! *laugh* I'm sorry that you felt bad about your professor telling you that you are shy and wanting you to work on it. I guess that he just wants you to be more outgoing and speak out more in class. I hope that you feel better about it soon! I know how hard it is when someone says something about yourself that you don't feel you agree with or that makes you feel strange or hurt. I am sure that he did not mean to hurt your feelings, and was just trying to help you. If it really keeps bothering you, I hope that you can talk to him about it. I really don't have any great tips for combatting shyness, as I am just now starting to try to become less shy after years of isolation. I know that you have to have confidence within yourself, or at least be able to pretend that you feel like you do. I just have not learned how to do that yet.

I get told that I'm shy. I suppose I can be if I'm around someone I don't know very well. But when I'm with my friends or when I'm in a conversation about a topic that interests me, I'm far from shy.

There's nothing wrong with being shy; I am a far cry from it but do feel uncomfortable in certain situations where I don't know anyone in a room or arrive late and everyone turns around to see who walked in late. I guess that's more of an embarassment than being shy but you get my drift. Telling yourself, in the mirror, to not be shy ... that's sounds like more Dr. Phil bullcrap. That's a man that I'd love to run over with a car. Be yourself ... that's the only person you have to answer to.

Although I am indeed shy, I don't really do all that much to combat it...I think I have also gotten better about it as the years have passed, but I remain a quiet, often shy person, and I consider that to be a part of who I am. not everyone does well being outgoing. I have been told to speak up more in the past, but not much in the last couple years. People who have met me perhaps once or had a class with me, are likely to say I am quiet, but talk to my friends and they will tell you otherwise. I can be outgoing with those I feel confortable with, and in other situations that might call for it, but in general I am content to be rather shy.

In my opinion, to be able to overcome shyness, you should expose yourself "out there" even more. By this I mean to be able go out more with your friends who are very confident. Sometimes, we get other people's habits (especially the ones we tend to hang out with more often). Another way is to identify yourself with a role model -- one who isn't afraid to express one's views. In the long run, you would work yourself to become your role model. In my case, i was really shy when I was little. My mother exposed me to declamations and speaking in public. She enrolled me in "confidence building" classes and speech development. Later, she would let me join declamation and oratorical contests. These things made me confident and from then on, I never had any stage fright. I even forgot what being shy means!

Hi, I feel shyness is a jewel and a gift for ladies, it makes them appear more beautiful and appealing, even for males shyness at some point of time enhances their personality,though not as frequently as with females. I think you are talking about lack of confidence and not shyness. Yes, lack of confidence can really be devastating for one's life and the best way to remove it is to communicate with people as much as possible, don't put self contraint on you, be yourself, feel free to express but I would recommend that you should be open with people you know for a long time, this will save you from embaresment

People have two opposite description of me. Some people like my friends and close relatives tell me that I am the most talkative person they have ever met and strangers or distant relatives tell me that I am the most silent person and shy. So I am really not hurt by what people tell about me because noone knows the real me except my parents and my best friends

Sometimes I'm shy. It really all depends on what's going on and how well I know people (or care to know the people). So on occasion I do get told - and like you I'm a lot less shy now than I use to be. I too get a bit hurt but I think it's because we know it's a weakness or it's preceived as a weakness to some. I just try to be as blunt and bold as I can - with respect.

I'm shy in certain situations. If I feel comfortable with the person and/or the subject of conversation I'm not shy. I have a problem of thinking of something to say with people I don't know well. I'm not really that good at small talk. I was always told that if you don't know what to say, ask the person something about themselves. People love talking about themselves. I find that good advice. It always works. You could try that.

I think I am also shy, because there are many times when I want to say something, to participate, but I hesitate, because I'm afraid not to be laughed at. Everybody around me tells me that's wrong and I get that, but I just can't do it when it's actually taking place. I think I need more self-confidence and so do any other shy people. We lack of self-confidence! (I think that's what the mirror thing is all about!:P)

i'm shy at first but i warm up pretty quickly. it's easier for me to warm up to a stranger since i was a waitress. i wouldnt get to be friends with any of these people though. i don't like getting too close to people. once someone gets to know me then they know i'm not shy at all. but i dont that close to people. i like to talk on the internet with people. it's much easier for me to talk to someone over the internet.

I'm very shy, however I haven't been told that I'm shy.. Well, it's not exactly shyness but I do have a big problem hitting on girls.. I guess it's a lack of confidence

basicaaly i think most of my life ive been pretty shy, and loads of people have told me so. i was also really quiet and a soft talker. i was from a small school and all and knew everyone, and everyone knew me, but still i was kinda silent and shy. i really didnt care for adults i think, or older kids. and as soon as i got into highschool, fresman year, i had like 1 friend from the other school i came from. and that was because i didnt make any effert to make any freinds or speak to anyone. people i think felt sorry for me, which kndof upset me and annoyed me. but i did nothing about it, i just sat there. when sophmore year came i tried to come out of my shell some but i found it really difficult, i started talking to some other people, while the others held on to the opinion of me as a silent lonely girl. but towards the end of the year, i opened up so much more then i ever had, and summer gym happened, which i found myself very open and talkitive and it was great. but this year is the best. i talk to my friends and i talk in class and everything, im really the best i ever have been. but i find myself on occasion talking to no one, because i dont like talking to people i dont like, so when freinds arent there, i just sit there and do nothing. i dont like to, but i dont wanna make conversation with those i dont like. but i feel like i did back fresman year, and i hate it. but i rarely get that way, so its all good!

Looks like your facing same problem as me. Now am a doing my Post Graduation. Almost upto one year before me to had the same feelings. From my school days to till one year before so many people called me shy & your not active like others etc etc... Even my parents, brother & Sister. There were so many nights I couldn't sleep. I too always felt that am not that much shy as others saying. Am some what quit person. I think I rarely hurts anyone for anything...even though people used to tease me. But atlast I taken decision that I 'll never ever care about such things anymore. That decision I taken proved to be good I think. I changed my attitude very much. Now I think my mind is strong face such things... Nowadays no one telling me ' You are shy' So I think first thing I want to recommand to you is stop taking such things to your heart. Be bold. You can't shut others mouth. Be brave lets others change their mind themselfs. Good Luck !

Try being assertive in everyday things from going to a restaurant to a grocery store. You shouldn't feel hurt, not everyone can or wants to be outgoing. The only time you should worry about shyness if it is keeping you from accomplishing goals. Maybe you are just tactfully silent.

They say that shyness is the ornamentation of a woman's personalit.It is true that women do feel shy very easily. And it is that on some particular occasions women are just overcome with shyness and cannot react very properly and they lose control over themselves. But men also suffer from shyness and is not at all that they are never overcome with shyness. On some occasions they cannot control themselves and cannot suppress their shyness. But it varies from person to person. When somebody is praised eloquently in his very presence, he might be overcome with that eulogy and cannot be responsive in a natural way and he feels shy of give vent to his inward emotion in public. Actually shyness is a a particular state of mind when emotion suppresses emotion, one intervenes the other leaving a person speechless. This is true to both men and women. But women are are more conducive to show their emotion of shyness.

Many people have pointed out that I am shy. But honestly, I never 'felt' shy in any such instances. Perhaps, they take my reticence for shyness at times. I do not like to talk unless I have something relevant to say, and also if someone is listening. I do not mind people thinking of me as shy lad, because I know they are wrong and cherish the idea of being capable of projecting a false impression..(kidding)

I was so shy that it took me months to even talk to my aunt....I grew out of it slowly, and I was about 15 by the time I was to a good point of not being shy. Now, I am still shy in some situations, but I force myself to just jump into the situation and that helps me to get over it for that time.

i've been told before that i'm shy. but it's somehow true. i tend to be shy when other people who are not close to me are around. i can't get well with others easily. but some people also tell me that i'm now not being shy. i think we can overcome it by facing a lot of people everyday, and making new friends.

I am really shy and have been my whole life. I have become less shy over the years and don't really care what people think of me. I wish I knew a trick to get over it.