Friend crisis

United States
February 7, 2007 1:17pm CST
I have a very dear and wonderful friend that I have known for about six years now. She is married with two kids. For the past five years that I have known her she has had problems in her marriage. I have allways tried to be there for her and help her as much as I could and yes I am sorry but I do have deep feelings for her but I am a gentlemen and will remain her friend. Well about a month ago she told me she thought she was in love with another married man and had been calling him and talking to him for somtime. This hurt me and it is very hard to talk to her anymore but I still care about her very much, so I have left her alone for about two weeks now and she is angry at me. anybody know or have any advise abou this. Thank's
2 responses
@wenkinnoc (482)
7 Feb 07
I agree with the above poster. Unrequited love can be a truly corrosive thing, posionous to the heart, and hellish to the soul. You have dedicated yourself to supporting her and being there for her why is she so angry at you for not being in touch for two weeks? If she is so happy with this other man, then surely she should not have any need to be angry unless it is simply to tell you the "good news" in which case, it is simply an exercise in ego stroking. My gut feeling is that your friend has came to rely upon you as a emotional safety net, and now that is gone, she feels resentful. You have nothing to feel guilty about, I would let the dust settle and let your friend cool off. Then I would just come out and admit your feelings, pure and simple. If she truly values you then even if she does not feel the same way as you do about her, then she will simply be able to keep the friendship. Otherwise you will lose her, and be no worse off, for she simply was using you.
• United States
7 Feb 07
Thank's it helps to get advise. I needed that. from both of you.
@mnksmommy (301)
• United States
7 Feb 07
This is definitely a difficult situation. I understand your being hurt. As for your friend, she probably either believes that your were her friend and only a friend with no romantic feelings or she knew about your feelings and kept you as a fall back. Someone to run to.