Do you try to avoid looking at your reflection?

I don't consider myself bad-looking nor pretty. But I used to be a chubby girl, with glasses and braces during my adolescence. But the turning point came when I read the Bible more and were blessed with a great boyfriend who helped me to appreciate myself more. I mean no matter how bad I might look, I am still God's image, loved deeply by Him and the most interesting part is He does not regard the outer look because it's something that you are born with. It's much more difficult to shape up our character than to shape up our body. Even if you get to shape your body up like a supermodel, how long will it last?

I did this for years, I used to be very skinny then I developed several hormonal problems that caused me to gain weight and alos caused an increase in acne, so I went for several years not looking in mirrors or having my picture made. And in some ways I regret it now, I am currently loosing weight now. it helped to know that I did not purposely cause all the problems with my weight. And I really wish I would of found out about the hormonal problems sooner. (I thought I had a hormonal problem earlier but the doctors disagreed when they finally did agree I had alread gained a lot of weight, and I had nearly given up hope of figuring out what was wrong with me.) Anyway, even though you have gained a lot of weight, that does not mean you should pretend you don't need to be seen, that does not help trust me. First find out if you have some sort of disorder that is causing your weight gain, some thngs to check into depending on who you are is thyroid problems (these effect both men and women and can be missed there are four different blood levels that nee dto be checked and sometimes you need to be checked more than once, this can be hard to get done sometimes) Also some newer studies are suggesting that what is normal for some is NOT normal for others. Another thing that can cause weight gain is PCOS (this only effects women because it deals with ovaries, and periods men don't have that) If you suspect PCOS you need to have a blood tests done to check various hormonal levels, also some people with pcos have irregular periods, and have increase acne and hair on their face,and neck, but are loosing hair on top of their heads. (I have pcos and an underactive thyroid and until I found out what was causing the problems I have been having I felt like a freak, sometimes I still do) Anyway, there are other things that cause weight gain too, things like addisons disease and cushingtons disease, and I am sure many others that I do not know about. But still it makes you feel bad when you are fat and everyone is thinking you are eatting more than you are. I will tell you that if you have pcos I have had three different doctors tell me that things like bread, rice and pastas will make you gain weight even if you eat a regular serving size of these items. (it is because these types of foods increase your insulent resisitance which leads to increased weight gain. Which leads to you feeling bad, or discouraged. I was told by a doctor that because of the pcos and the underactive thyroid that it will be harder for me to loose weight, it is possible but harder,. I was told that I need to eat a high protein diet, and avoid sugar and carbs especially rice, pastas, and breads. Also for me fruit is not a good choice either but whole fruit is better than juice, but only like 1/4 of a cup fruit. It is not good to do like I did and avoid looking at yourself because one day you will and you will be looing at a stranger, (thats really not a good feeling) You can find out if you have a health problem that caused you to gain weight, and if that is the case you can work on getting healthy and you will feel better as your health improves. If you have a problem like I do exact portion size is very important as is a lot more exercise than the average person is used to. depending on your condition I would suggest starting with walking, and drinking lots of water. I hope you feel better soon, and that you are able to loose weight get in shape and feel healthy soon.

I don't avoid it. I'm not a fan of looking in the mirror but those days of feeling insecure over these matters are long gone for me. I've found a wife who loves me and i have son these things aren't important to me now. Perfection isn't something anyone can reach. It's being normal and respecting that which is important and hopefully other people will notice this and stop feeling like an outsider because they will be accecpted. Sorry about the speech. ~Joey (i'd like to thank hopeful28 for posting this, my son.. blah) joking lol =) Kudos!

cmon.... u r wht u think u r... its all in ur mind.... do u actully care abt wht people think whn u dnt care abt them.... as in y to bother to feel embaressed in front of people u dnt knw u dnt knw tht u will see them ever,,,, u look in the mirror n say u r beautiful n u will feel the same... right.... u knw wht beliveing in urself is the trick.,... if u look confident thr half battle is already won.... so b confident and dnt treat urself low... u r the beautiful.... a girl whose heart is beautiful thn she has to b beautiful.....

At times I avoid looking at my reflection when I feel I am not at my best. It also gets too tiring looking at yourself sometimes,,, so... I give mirrors a break. :) I think that's normal for girls because we are just too conscious of how we look. Beauty cannot be based on how skinny or how fat a girl is. As a matter of fact, I know a lot of gorgeous, healthy women and believe it or not, people (including myself) admire them and their confidence. Cheers! :)

I can feel your pain. In the last six months I myself have gained 30lbs. I am pretty short already at only five feet tall, so for me this is significant. I have avoided looking in the mirror at home and in store windows and the reflection of myself when I get out of the car. My face has been breaking out from stress, although I have never had a perfect complexion to begin with. So, yes, I have definately been dodging mirrors and water puddles. Hopefully this won't last long because while I have never been one to enjoy looking at my reflection, intentionally avoiding it is kind of a nuisance. I think people are beautiful from the inside, although I feel like a hypocrite when I criticize my own self. I am sure other people are not noticing the things you are, and I assure you that you are indeed a beautiful person.

Mine is not so much that I put on weight, I don't like the fact that my face is looking older. I find myself particularly avoiding this big trough of water that we have, because I have to bend over it and my face looks all saggy and my eyes look squished. My mind is 20 years behind my body image.

:( That's sad to hear someone say. I'm sure despite the fact that you've put on weight you're still beautiful! I'm not sure what else to say as I've never had a problem losing weight, I'm the opposite.

Personally, I am no skinny twig myself, and for a long time I really hated to look at myself because I didn't like what I saw. I saw reminders of self-loathing and other people's perceptions every time I looked in the mirror, but I never once really saw myself. It was always what I expected from myself, what I believed others expected from me. I started to get into holistic healing, meditation, self-help programs and I learned that by avoiding my reflection, I was refusing to face the problems I had with myself. I wasn't just ignoring my weight, I was ignoring me. I wasn't giving myself the personal validation that I needed to feel human, and so I sunk lower and lower into sadness and depression. I hope you find the strength inside of you to recognize your beauty. In reaching out this way I can already see that you are a delicate and thoughtful person with a great heart. Take those as reasons to see yourself in a new light, the light that shows you that you are not your body, but the wonderful being inside your body. Your soul is what really matters, and when your soul is happy, your body shows it.

hopeful i think you should consider looking for help....i know of other people with that problem and they've improved a lot with therapy. You must learn how to accept yourself and the way you look, and perhaps you need someone to help you with it.

I can empathize with you. I have issues with my weight as well. I tend to go up and down, and so I know what you mean. I try to avoid looking at my reflection when I am heavy, because it makes me feel worse. Part of it, is the mirrors, and or reflection is not flattering, and really can make you feel worse. In addition, don't get a camera near me either. I can't stand it when I get my picture taken, and then have to see it afterwards. Yuck. So I guess misery likes company. Glad to know I am not alone.

I see myself in mirror. I am not afraid of my weight. I know i am fat but i am happy as i am. One should have self confidence and please don't think you are not beautiful, you are beautiful!!!

Instead of feeling like this my dearest, you should try to make it work for you the other way around. Place a photo of your desired built or a photo of how you want to look like and look everyday on the mirror and tell yourself that you would do better today in trying to lose weight. Make this a motivation instead of getting to a depressing mood. It is not the end for you! Prove that you could be a success story like everyone out there who did it for themselves. Check out my discussions for some healthy tips in losing weight. I understand your situation I was once 220 lbs. after giving birth but because of constant exercise, diet, and motivation I was able to trim it down to 130 lbs.

Yeah, I have that problem too sometimes. Then I'll half shave or throw anything on. We should take the time to look at ourselves in the mirror. Self pride permeates everything about us. Some people who we think look so great spend hours in the mirror trying to get that way. Don't worry about trying to impress superficial people who are going to judge you solely on your looks alone. Just because a person is overweight doesn't mean they can't look good. I know lots of good - looking overweight people.

All those kind of surfaces distort and make silly shapes, you do not need to take notice of them in a negative way, even size 0 supermodels would look silly, try to smile at hos silly it is instead of allowing it to drag you deper down. I don't tend to look at meself much if I can help it, my hair is peach at the moment as it is meant to be going back blonde but not quite managing it, but I caught a quick glance in the kitchen mirror earlier with my hair up and just for a split second I thought I looked nice. Just always remember the last thing you put on your face after pciknig balckheads which you shouoldn;t do without steaming is a good toner or even freezing cold water to close your pores. Things are not as bad as you feel they are at the moment, you just need to find tiny positive things to cling too, just remember you can send me a message anytime and I'll get back to you the first chance I get, promise!

I have done this in the past when I was feeling depressed and when I was overweight but I have learned to love and accept myself the way that I am and I know that I am a beautiful person, whether I am skinny or overweight. You are a beautiful person as well and you should not let your weight bother you. You are a beautiful person no matter what other people may think or say to or about you.

I too have gained alot of weight due to health issues.BUT instead of avoiding my reflection I do quit the oppisite,I look every chance I get.Not because I'm proud of the weight,no not at all.I do it to see what improvements I've made and to make sure that yeah,I am looking better and doing the most I can.Losing weight is a long slow process and evey little bit of encouragement is a help.Don't hate yourself because you're heavy,it takes all kinds to make up the world and it's nothing to be ashamed of.Encourage and love yourself instead.Start taking better care of yourself and you'll start feeling better overall,trust me.;-)

no, actually i love to see my reflection whenever there is glass or mirror around.' honestly i have scars on my face because of a viral infection last month, but i do not care about it. i always put in my mind that i am beautiful no matter what they say... love yourself,and be proud of who you are, be thankful that you are alive,appreciate yourself even you are fat, beauty is only skin deep, the most important is the attitude... goodday....

I don;t look at my reflection unless I have to -- I'm fine with full-length mirrors, but nothing which I have to look at my face in -- it always looks ugly to me, and my complexion is terrible... It's just another insecurity.

dear Hopeful, yes yes I do understand for years and years I never looked at anything that would reflect back my whole person. I was so overweight, and so ashamed of my self, I also was so angry with myself for being so stupid for being like that, Oh the self talk was horrible. There was no one in this world that had more to say about my appearance, than me. And none of it was good. My self esteem was at 0 and I hated myself more and more each day. I went to doctors and all the right stuff, but it wasn't until I was able to accept who and what I was that I could change it.I found after long and difficult journey that in order to change, we have to acknowledge where we are and what we are, And that meant looking at myself in a mirror, I kept telling myself that is not the real me, I can't be that big,no please no make it go away. But it didn't and then I chose to deal with it. I had an operation called a small bowel bypass, and it worked to a certain degree, I went from 280 down to 180, I am 4 feet 11 inches, so I was just as easy to step over as walk around.But I still had what I call a fat mentality, My depression and anger still grew. To make along story short I finally came to realize that I am me and If I do not love and respect myself Who will?The sad answer to that one is no one. So now I can look in a mirror and not necessarily be happy at the person looking back but the anger and hatred is gone. I no longer have all the judge jury and hang em in my mind, I have a cheering and way to go girl section for me to listen to, and my life is so much better. So Dear that is my story and I do understand and If you need encouragement and way to go girl I am here for you, and it is not the weight loss I am talking about but lets celebrate the fact that you are a beautiful human being that is full of sorrow, and working on exchanging the sorrow for happiness Regards Robin