WHAT are the secrets of a PERFECT relationship...?
@totalearnings (1603)
India
February 12, 2007 1:38am CST
i was thinking on the secrets of perfect relationship be it your wife or lover. i could just think of four
1. it’s important to have a woman who helps at home, who cooks from time to time,
2. it’s important to have a woman who can make you laugh.
3. it’s important to have a woman who you can trust and who doesn’t lie to you.
4. it’s important to have a woman who loves u and likes to be with you.
share any other secrets you know please?
9 people like this
66 responses
@LindaLou (483)
• Canada
12 Feb 07
Well, I think that the secret to a PERFECT relationship is to have BOTH partners with these qualities and not to just expect it of one partner or the other. To expect the other to be perfect and not set any similar standards for yourself automatically dooms a relationship to failure.
2 people like this
@roniroxas (10560)
• Philippines
12 Feb 07
YES YOU ARE RIGHT LINDALOU!!! thats a good answer. dont just think of what you need think also what your partner needs.
1 person likes this
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
12 Feb 07
thanks. you are rite. we cant clap with one hand.
1 person likes this
@Starline (681)
• United States
12 Feb 07
Well put! This is the way I have been thinking myself. It's not just a masculine quality to want to be spoiled sometimes, it's human. If I know that I like something, I try to do this for my partner, be it to have a meal prepared, receive a small gift or whatever, if I like it he will like it. This actually goes for all relationships not just lovers. It's not easy all the time, I like to be lazy sometimes but at least I am aware of the secret to the perfect relationship :p
@Jasmijn (145)
• Belgium
13 Feb 07
I think for having a good relationship, it's important not to have conditions like yours. ;-) I think a good relationship is like happiness, if you purposefully aim for it, you can't have it. I know you should work at a relationship, but not for the purpose to make it a good one, but simply because you care for your partner. Aiming for a good relationship seems to me like preferring the relationship over the partner, and in that way you'll never get a good relationship, right?
Also, I agree of course with the comments that said that both man and woman should be trustworthy, and loving.. but I'm sure you were just thinking from your point of view as a man and didn't actually mean that only women should have those qualities. ^^
1 person likes this
@smille (829)
• India
12 Feb 07
when u exepct all these things from a woman, u too are promising the same for her? help,trust,secire life,and love froever? if ur answer is yes then u hv the right to expect anything from other person.....first u must devote and love and creat trust thts the most important thing.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
12 Feb 07
hey smile! really happy with your comments. i could not just stop thinking , how wonderful the relation would be if both are promising and doing these things for each other...it would be the happiest part. what you say?
@clod0327 (817)
• Philippines
13 Feb 07
I think the secret to a perfect relationship is Trust & Communication.
You should always trust your partner no matter what and you should always do things that will not let the Trust be ruined. From Trust everything else follows.
You should also have good communication. If there is a problem, you should talk about it rigth away. You should not let the day pass without you talking about it. Otherwise, the problem migth blow out of proportion. Also, it is important that your partner know how you really feel and what exactly is on your mind. Marriage are sometimes ruined by miscoomunication, so I think good communication is really important.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
13 Feb 07
hi clad thanks for those suggestions. trust is the basic thing added with communication. with communication alone one will be able to share and bare by removing even the slightest misunderstandings.
@rajsdev (4)
• India
13 Feb 07
All the four are good but all of them have be vice vers too.
I will add some of the other very important aspects too totalearnings.
It is understanding,being in empathy when the other has a problem and truly being altruistic to be in the life long process.
sharing not only joy but grief.
Like this Your pain in my pain and your joy in my joy.
In short it is ours all the way as we are one.Think say and do, naturally , spontaneously and to the end of times..
All the best.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
13 Feb 07
hi rajsdev. thanks for those add ons. i agree. above all i.e sharing love, happiness or joy, communication, trust etc..real understanding is matters/valued between both only at the times of grief.
@CarlyLaine (759)
• United States
12 Feb 07
The KEY SECRETS to a perfect relationship is...
Live alone
Don't have a husband
don't have a boyfriend
That's a perfect relationship with ME!
@CarlyLaine (759)
• United States
23 Feb 07
I found your response after a week. I was kidding. YEESH! My boyfriend and I are quite compatible.
Does everyone on here take everything SUPER SERIOUS? Lighten up people.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
13 Feb 07
hi carlylaine. by living alone you are not relating to anyone. then existence of relationship does not arise, leave aside perfect of ortherwise. here you just made me recollect what Jane Austin said in 'Pride and Prejudice'. she says ''It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a
single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife''. in your case a husband or boyfriend. being in a relationship is really wonderful....its upto you to decide. Good wishes
@weemam (13372)
•
12 Feb 07
well first of all I am a woman, so the answer might be different , but with my experience having been married for 45 very happy years is .
Someone you can talk to
someone you can laugh with
someone you can trust
someone you can share secrets with
someone you can respect
the most important one SOMEONE YOU LOVE WITH ALL YOUR HEART
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
12 Feb 07
wonderful weemam, i agree with the comments you are making with 45yrs of experience. good wishes
@anjalisk2005 (1492)
• India
12 Feb 07
the secrets of a perfect relationship is understanding,love and faith.when u sit with ur partner the time should race faster.if u spend an hour it should look like minutes and minutes like seconds.thats where u know that its a perect relationship.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
12 Feb 07
thats looks like the filmy style. anyway what i understand is that both should spend time with each other so much that they cant bear seperation even for a second...
@candygurl24 (1880)
• Canada
24 Feb 07
There are no "perfect" relationships in this world..if there is, it is a farce. Everyone argues from time to time etc. Find the one that drives you crazy, but that you still love when all is said and done. Everyone has faults, but stay with the one that you can deal with his/her faults. There are no secrets to a happy, healthy relationship. They are well known facts...love, trust, respect.
@cabergren (1181)
• United States
12 Feb 07
I agree with those answers, but do you think those qualities should also be in a man??? And I think you forgot the most important quality of a good relationship which is communication. If you and your partner can't communicate your relationship is probably not gonna work out.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
12 Feb 07
yes communication is important between both. communication is essentially a bridge of meaning between both by which both can safely cross the river of misunderstanding thats seperates both.
@mastergkage (182)
• Philippines
13 Feb 07
i agree with you yana only by trust and faith through each other can help a relationship works and also both man and woman must work for their realtionship like they say it takes two to tango
@fatal_ivory (238)
• Philippines
12 Feb 07
As for me, there is no perfect relationship. I only believe in a healthy one. To have a healthy relationship, both of you should feel the love for each other. Not only that, trust should always be present. It is also good that both of you should be open-minded to things that involves your relationship. Not only that, you should learn how to compromise. Having a relationship is a two-way road. It is a give-and-take process.
Both of you should feel the freedom to take a stand in every move or decisions you two make. Both of you should not be controlled by the other. Partners are two different mind. So, it is better to grow independently or in your own way together. by that, your tie will be stronger.
One more thing, make your communication line always open. Open most of your secrets to each other but not all. The reason is to still leave some mystery in you that your partner will be crazy digging the deepnes of your personality. That brings excitement to your relationship.
Hope it'll add to your ideas.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
12 Feb 07
well said ivory. both should live as if the other is half part of himself or herself spiritually and mentally. therefore, the relationship between the both the members should be like the fish and water; and not like the fish and the fisherman.
@hdb425 (72)
• Philippines
12 Feb 07
First of all, I don't believe there's such a thing as a perfect relationship much as no perfect person exists. What makes a relationship between two people strong and interesting are the following:
1. open communication between them (whether they have a casual talk, a steaming debate, an intelligent argument - communication is key to every relationship)
2. along with communication is trust - they should be able to trust each other about everything
3. acceptance - both should accept each other for who they are, good qualities and bad qualities alike
4. laughter - having laughter & joy in a relationship eases the stress of everyday and gives each couple an opportunity to enjoy light moments
5. romance - keeping the flame of romance alive will ensure that no one goes astray in the relationship; go on dates, give each other massages, cook for each other, hold hands, hug each other, cuddle whenever you can
A perfect relationship would be boring...but a relationship filled with both the sweetness of good things and tempered with the spice of not so good things make for an interesting relationship that can withstand the test of time.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
12 Feb 07
that was really coool hbd425. i am delighted. so the relationship should be like a spicy dish containing open communication, trust towards each other about everything(well thats above all needed), acceptance,laughter (wooo i feel relationship would be half done without that, and romance ( you have said it all). God bless you and all
@unishwetabh (1031)
• India
12 Feb 07
You can't clap with a single hand. Just like that the realtionship is such a thing that can only be maintaned by co-ordination from both the sides. Faith, truth and trust is what the two need to put in their relationship with each other. This can make their life very simple and fun also. Even a slightest misunderstanding can destroy the whole relation. So be careful with that.
@totalearnings (1603)
• India
12 Feb 07
well said unishwetabh. being truthful is the basic thing for relationship rest follow. but then misunderstanding do exit between both at some point or the other, therfore, a comprising attitude should add on so that both can remove the misunderstanding and keep the relationship intact. further these misunderstandings can also arise between both due to third person. i have seen very healthy relationship going into trouble only because either of them mistrusted coming under the influence of the third person. hope you agree that..
@ajaykumarmeher (815)
• India
13 Feb 07
The secret of perfect and successful relation ship is the mutual understanding and trust. If the partners do not trust each other then they will doubt each other even in very petty things. And eventually it will lead to a miserable life. It is also required to allecviate your ego with your partner as it is a primary cause of fight between copuples.
I see that if both the husband and wife are working then it is very difficult to carry forward a smooth relationship as long as you are not bringing the office tension to your family.
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
13 Feb 07
# 1- it takes team work #2-communication #3- respect # 4-Trust....These are 4 things that is very important,if these 4 things are there the rest will fall in place
@mcaf1970 (140)
• Philippines
13 Feb 07
there's no such thing as PERFECT RELATIONSHIP. generally, every relationship has its ups & downs. couples sometimes have misunderstandings.
the best way to describe is AN EVERLASTING RELATIONSHIP. the secrets are God is in the center in a relationship, trust & understanding for each other.
@flagella08 (5065)
• Philippines
13 Feb 07
the way to a perfect relationship is to give way for each other. instead of giving comments which is not good for each one's ear, try to appreciate if your significant other is doing the right thing. If it's that bad, try to suggest good ones. Refrain from giving rude responses. That will magnify a fire between the two of you and eventually will weaken your bond as partners. It's just how you say it. Be kind.
@carol79 (201)
• Philippines
13 Feb 07
The secret of a perfect relationship would be communication, love, honesty, trust, romance, making love, belief, friendship, responsibility, and understanding.