Husbands and holidays
By smurfettewv
@smurfettewv (359)
United States
February 14, 2007 7:10am CST
Every year I make sure to buy my hubby gifts for birthday anniversery Christmas and Valentines. Every year I get nothing or I have to wait til a pay day or two later if Im lucky and I have to pick it out my self.
I get so hurt cause I buy the stuff way in advance hide it and wait to give it and then like today Im told I didnt get you anything Im sorry as usual and he goes to bed.
Feeling sorry for himself not for the fact that he didnt buy me anything.
All I asked for was a hand written letter that what I have asked for since our anniversery. and another holiday meant for love and no letter not a card not even a ecard. So all I get this year is him feeling sorry and me reassuring him its ok its just another day (when deep down I hurt)Im being petty and selfish I know, it just hurts after 7 yrs.That I have gotten 5 gifts that I didnt pick out on my own that were surprises.
Sorry to complain
1 person likes this
5 responses
@Alexandria37 (5717)
• Ireland
14 Feb 07
You have my symathy. My husband is exactly the same. I told him that to-day was Valentine's Day and he told me to take the money and buy something for myself. I wish for once, he would just be a little romantic and buy me a box of chocolates or something. Don't feel hurt by it. Some men are not romantically inclined and it doesn't mean they love us any less. Hope you have a nice Valentine's Day.
@smurfettewv (359)
• United States
14 Feb 07
When he does that I take the money and buy my best two friends gifts for valentines day and he will say I told you to get something and I said I did I got the two people who always remember me a gift and that made my Valentines day happy. What I hate the most is honey I was going to buy you this and it will be something really great and yet.... thats worse than never getting anything and yep some arent romantic at all but it hurts that they dont try. At least all 4 of my kids gave me a little card this morning sometimes that all a mom needs.
@michelledarcy (5220)
•
14 Feb 07
I think you should talk to him about how you feel. He probably doesn't realise how upset this makes you or that you only require a small gift and not even anything bought. Maybe he can't afford to get you a gift and doesn't realise that a hand made gift would mean just as much to you.
@smurfettewv (359)
• United States
14 Feb 07
oh he knows how I feel and I just say its ok to keep him from using that as a excuse to feel sorry for himself. I never ask for anything that cost alot (we have money but Im not materialistic)I ask for a letter in caligriphy cause he writes so beautiful and I bought him the set and he has not used it once... and for a dinner well he works this evening and I thought we would go to breakfast but he is snoring away until he needs to go to work so Ill go pack his lunch and put the card I got him in the lunch box.
@My2Cents (291)
• Canada
16 Feb 07
I can relate. my birthday was missed this year. I let him know how I felt..I cried and really let him know how it hurt me to not get anything but a 'happy birthday'. It was the first time I really let him in on the hurt...and you know what. he felt really bad...to this day he feels bad. I did get something yesterday as a result lol... But I realized that he is not thoughtless...he is just..well...a man. And I dont mean that in an awful way.
One thing I am certain of is his love for me. He may not show it like I would like, but he does show it in many other ways and regardless of his absentmindness, I love him completely...and I know he feels the same way.
@krysy1982 (1041)
• United States
14 Feb 07
Mine is exactly the same way. We have been together 8yrs. I have recieved 3 gifts from him over the years. I don't complain but it does make you feel bad.
@MBourgeois (177)
•
14 Feb 07
If you're hurt, you should let him know.
I love getting my boyfriend something special on Christmas or on his birthday (we don't celebrate Valentine's Day), so I think about it months in advance! My birthday was early November, and I still haven't received anything. I also got him a little something for Christmas, which he didn't return although he went to Spain for a week and could have brought something back.
Actually, now that I think of it, I sent him a card for Valentine's day, which I thought was quite funny and summed up my feelings for him. I also planned what I think is an amazing card for his birthday, and I was thinking of getting him something, but because we've only been together for a few months and he's still beingn complex and not sure what to think of me, I might not go through the trouble of getting him something for his birthday.
