When I Say I Don't Care, I Mean I Don't Care
By misskatonic
@misskatonic (3723)
United States
February 14, 2007 2:17pm CST
It's Valentine's Day. Which means nothing to me other than tomorrow I will be able to buy truck loads of cheap candy. That is what the 'holiday' boils down to, for me. Cheap candy. And really, that is a reason to celebrate. Candy Day! Candy Day also falls directly after Halloween and Easter.
But I really don't care about Valentine's Day. It's commercial, it's silly, and I just don't get it. I never have. When presented today with cards and gifts, my response has been a rather dumb founded '...uh, thanks....' and mild discomfort.
I don't care about Valentine's Day, I don't want to get anything on Valentine's Day, and I don't want to be dragged into the festivities. And I don't want people wasting money on buying me chocolate I can buy tomorrow at half price. It's pointless.
And the fact that most people do it because they don't want me to 'feel bad' because I'm single.... I don't care! I am happy being single. I am single by choice. There's a reason I keep turning down dates.
Why do people feel the need to foist their own traditions off on other people? I don't care really does mean 'I don't care'.
15 people like this
38 responses
@rdolphingirl (361)
• United States
14 Feb 07
First off ... I would like to say WELL SAID!
I am also single by choice, not that I have had to turn down dates lately, don't get many offers the way I am living right now. (single mom staying home with 3 boys, all of whom have "issues", and I am homeschooling them) I don't get out much. I don't work outside my home, etc.
I totally agree with you, V-Day is a big commercial frackin rip-off. The best thing is the day after sales... LOL
I have no idea why some people don't seem to be able to accept this concept. Its not like you are trying to make them change? or even say they are wrong to celebrate if they want to?
2 people like this
@helpful_ideas (1620)
• United States
14 Feb 07
*nods* I'm in a relationship and I scheduled a business meeting for tonight. One of the other two people who was supposed to attend the meeting backed out on grounds that "his fiancee will kill him". Grrr. But he did say it was fine if we called him.
I have SOOOO many comments about this. When I told my husband about it, he just laughed and said I should be more tolerant of other people's ignorances. *sigh*
1 person likes this
@zannechaos (42)
• United States
14 Feb 07
Now see, I love cards. Especially if they're outrageous and amusing. I love getting cards for people, I love getting them, I love the moments of "OH MY GOD XD" when they see the punchlines, and hell, I get cards for people on an utterly random basis for no reason other than "...hey, that'll make 'em laugh!"
...
What's really pathetic though? I've been known to BUY cards to give to someone... only it's not from me or for them. IT'S FROM A CHARACTER TO A CHARACTER. I'm whipped. I'm so whipped. -_-;;;
1 person likes this
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
14 Feb 07
Okay, the character thing? I love that. One of my good buddies who I RP with will do that sort of thing, and I always love it. I'm actually writing a poem from one of my characters to another.
But personally... I never get anything but the standard, sappy, cliche stuff. Trite messages that say nothing, another teddy bear with a heart, that kind of stuff.
2 people like this
@loujac3 (1188)
• United States
14 Feb 07
I join you in your feelings!
I just got dumped - email - by I guy that I trusted and was led to believe that I was the one. Another case of trophy hunting. He is now onto the next hunting grounds.
I do not feel that I can trust again and each time it only got more painful. I have a better relationship with my dog.
I am putting on my blinders, redirecting my life and working to make me a better person without men in my life. I have tried the dating sites, only to be used and dumped and lied to. I have wasted countless hours believing the tripe that these men pour out and expect women to believe so that they can score.
FREEDOM - Just another word for nothing left to lose. Janis Joplin
Better than losing over and over again.
My coworkers keep trying to match me up with men who are not into being matched up. Maybe they have been burned too often as well. All I know is that I can't deal with the big falls anymore and I am better off by myself.
Time to take my dog for his run.
Best wishes to you and stay happy!
1 person likes this
@vega83 (6342)
• Bahrain
15 Feb 07
that's right, girl.
kudos to being single,
no headaches, and as for the 'hallmark' holiday,
well, let's just say it's nice for people to take a little time off from their lives and appreciate their better halves, but it's not 'compulsory' for all.
i'm sick of some of my friends always asking me so you still single, why don't you find someone just so you can celebrate valentine's day, and these are the same friends who come to me with all their 'relationship' problems.
my answer to them would be i can celebrate valentine's day even if i am single, i don't because i don't want to.
and i don't wanna hang around some poor schmuck who i just used for one day anyway, i'm so bored of people making such a big issue about it.
what kind of a person do you think i am?
1 person likes this
@xXxRashEeD (305)
• Philippines
15 Feb 07
it's so nice for you to be so honest about that..
we all know that we could all have a date whenever..
but is it only for the day's occasion why we are buying gifts, flowers and chocolates and stuffs for our someone..!?
duh with them..
it's juz Valentine's day.. and that made it different from the rest of the days.. one of the year's ocassion.. but beyond that.. nothing's more different.. its still a normal day for me..
1 person likes this
@tarunbhatia (160)
• India
14 Feb 07
yes i am agree with you,valentines day does'nt matter to me either.what happens on this day,happens all the year.you are true...its silly,its commercial!
1 person likes this
@margieanneart (26423)
• United States
14 Feb 07
Are you angry? You sound like it. If you don't like it or it doesn't mean anything to you, that's fine dear. To each their own. I'm sorry people make you feel uncomfortable. If you are single and happy that way, hey, that's fine, it's your life. Blessings, M&M
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
14 Feb 07
Not angry at all. Except for the fact that I wish my friends would listen to me and actually pay attention to what I say. That;s the part that gets me twitchy. If I tell people I don't want anything and I don't want to get involved in holiday festivities, I mean it. And I'm just sick and tired of the people who know me assuming I mean something other than what I say.
1 person likes this
@TheOneTrueVersion (163)
• United States
15 Feb 07
What's so bad about people actually showing they care? It's not like they went out to annoy on this day. They probably could do that every other day if they wanted too. Just wanted to brighten another otherwise dull day. I don't see the whole magic behind Valentine's Day either, but I don't mind if people spring things on me. Honestly there is no stopping certain people, because that's the only way they know to express themselves. It's a free day to admit they do so appreciate you as well.
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
15 Feb 07
Why have a day to celebrate something that should be celebrated every day? Are we really so jaded and introverted as a people that we need commercials to tell us when and what to say, and tangible items given on a particular day to show how we feeling about other people?
@suedarr (2382)
• Canada
14 Feb 07
It sounds like your friends do have good intentions, but have you made it clear to them how you feel about Valentine's Day?
If you have told them ahead of time, then I agree with you that their cards and gifts are inapproprite and they should respect your wishes.
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
14 Feb 07
They should be very, very clear on my feelings. I only mention them whenever Valentine's day comes up. That's the part that bugs me - they know how I feel, and I'd like to think they knew me well enough to know when I say I don't want something, I don't want it.
1 person likes this
@kitchenwitchoftupper (2290)
• United States
15 Feb 07
Oh, MissK, don't you know that you have just set yourself up for a very pretty and sparkly Valentine from me on your home page! You go out and get lots of cheap candy tomorrow and eat as much of it as you can for me, sweetie! I care about YOU! The wicked old witch - Donna Momma of them All
@misskatonic (3723)
• United States
15 Feb 07
See, your Valentine is the type I appreciate. ;) I shall think of you when I splurge on candy! *hugs*
@rekkusu (601)
•
14 Feb 07
Somebody sounds lonely ;)
Nah just kidding, i now how you feel it just another day engineered to make people spend more money (damn the guy who invented these holidays must've been a genius)
Its not valentines day its just another bog standard Wednesday for me, as if i could care less ;)
1 person likes this
@chaygylmommy (2470)
• United States
14 Feb 07
People that care about you just want you to not feel left out. I don't know why people insist on buying people things when they say they don't want them. BUT...my parents say they don't want anything every single year for Christmas, but I just feel so cheap not buying them anything. After all they have done for me. Maybe that is what it is with your friends. They want to thank you for all you have done for them and this is a great reason to do it.
1 person likes this
@yanjiaren (9031)
•
14 Feb 07
shame my son is a bit on the young side lol..you would make a great daughter in lol..we would agree to disagree on everything and we would really get on lol..this is so funny..i am the total sopppy romantic and you are the other way around..but it's great we get on so well lol..
i will go for the half price choc too lol..we don't buy flowers and cards and teddy bears lol..what we do is go for something practical..we buy each other something nice to wear..mind you i amk going to give you the jitters now..
wait for it..
don't cringe yet..
hang on..
hold your horses..
here it is..
it's coming....
i got a new bedspread..cos he lives in this dingy one room and he hasn;'t bought sheets in ten years lool..
so i bought us some new bedding..
practical right?
love and hugs
enjoy your freedom lol..
1 person likes this
@Denmarkguy (1845)
• United States
14 Feb 07
Heeeeyy! Cheap chocolate! Thanks for the reminder.
I understand what you're saying here... and even though I appreciate the underlying idea behind Valentine's Day, I always find myself mildly offended by the whole thing. It's not so much the cornucopic explosion of overcommercialization that gets to me, but the subtext that this is the "Day of Love," does that somehow let us OFF the "love hook" by rendering the remaining 364 days more or less meaningless?
I used to have a retail store that sold "gifty" things, and from standing behind the counter I truly got some insight into just HOW MUCH this is a "Guilt Driven Holiday." On February 13th, hordes of men would flock into the store, seemingly operating on the belief that if they "threw enough money at it" they could somehow buy their wives'/girlfriends' good graces for the rest of the year. I well understand that the intent is otherwise, but I found those attitudes to somewhat "cheapen" the whole idea of love. Love is an ongoing feeling, not a Hallmark Holiday.
But I'll send you a kindly thought when I pick up the discounted chocolate tomorrow!
1 person likes this
@sirensanssmile (3764)
• Netherlands
16 Feb 07
Because there are a lot of women out there that SAY that they don't care but really they do. They assume the safer road by putting you into the catagory with the majority of women who really care and say that they don't. You see it is more rare for them to find a women that really DON'T care.... It confuses them. They probably haven't run into women like you before so you shouldn't get too annoyed. At least they thought of your feelings! (even though you don't care)
I am one like that too. I really don't care either and I don't eat candy at all so I am annoyed when I get something because it always gets thrown away.... Or now I feed it to my boyfriend.... I just rationalise it as them not understanding and leave it at that.
@visitorinvasion (7709)
• United States
16 Feb 07
I find that when I say "I don't care" about certain things and people still insist upon bothering me with it, "I couldn't give a rat's a*s" usually does the trick. I couldn't care less about V-day either, but if someone wants to wish me a happy one or buy me something, that's on them.
@rsrait (567)
• India
16 Feb 07
Being single and not getting a valentine day hamper is ok but being single is no worry its nice to be one you have all the time in the world to do what you allways whanted to do but could not,i am also single can we be long distance friend s and share some youful thoughts.be happy my friend dont sulk.
@joey_matthews (8354)
•
15 Feb 07
"Why do people feel the need to foist their own traditions off on other people? I don't care really does mean 'I don't care'"
I'm not trying to argue but isn't this also what your doing? no offense some people enjoy these day orthers like you don't. it's fair to assume that these things might not be important but i respect what people choose.
It's important for me. It might be a lame way for shops and other places to gain our money but it's nice if you enjoy this. It's nice to read what you've got to say so don't take what i'm saying as me being rude. a discussion like this is a chance for me to voice my opinions.
Kudos.
~Joey
Btw not everythings cheap when it comes t holidays normally here the price of candy goes up. etc =)
@warriordes (2)
• Egypt
15 Feb 07
The same for me .. it means nothing .. and I think it's ridiculous having such a day .. what does it mean to remember the one you love one day .. i think it's something of everyday not just for one day
@bighed03 (1)
• United States
15 Feb 07
valentine's day is a fabricated "holiday" where corporate companies use their marketing tools to make money off of your emotions.
how much more depressing can that get?
