Canadian joke.

Are you Canadian? then you must be feeling nice over the issue But Americans will be thinking let the tunnel come and we will bang that Canadian

I'm Al Gore Good afternoon. I'm Al Gore, and I'd like to tell you about myself. I know a lot about hardship, because I came into this world as a poor black child in a tiny town in the backwoods of Tennessee. I was born in a log cabin that I built with my own hands. I taught myself to read by candlelight and helped support my 16 brothers and sisters by working summers as a deck hand on a Mississippi River steamboat. My mother taught me the value of education, so every day; I would walk 5 miles to a one-room schoolhouse. I was a mischievous, fun-loving scamp, thought I never dreamed that one-day, my youthful escapades would serve as the inspiration for "Huckleberry Finn." Back then, black folks in the south were second-class citizens. One day, a traveling minister came through town, and I asked him if anyone was ever going to do something to guarantee civil rights for all Americans. Well, I guess I made an impression. You see, the minister's name was Martin Luther King, Jr. My father was a United States Senator. He once perched me on his knee and said, "Son, if you work hard and listen to your mama, someday you can live in a hotel in Washington, D.C., and go to an exclusive prep school." But life of privilege was not for me. After getting my high school diploma, I took a job in a hot, dirty textile mill. I was so appalled at the treatment of the workers there that I organized a union. Later, that experience inspired a movie - which is why, to this day, my close friends at the AFL-CIO call me "Norma Rae." When word got out what an 18 year old factory worker had done, Harvard called and offered me a scholarship. I captained the hockey team to four consecutive national championships, but I also played football and was good enough to win the Heisman Trophy. During my college years, I lived in a housing project and moonlighted playing lead guitar for a little rock band. You may have heard of it-the Rolling Stones. But there was a war going on, and I felt I had to serve my country. So I enlisted in the U. S. Army and went to Vietnam. I was deeply opposed to the war, but I did my duty as a soldier and came back home with the Medal of Honor and the Croix de Guerre. When I got back, I took a long journey across this great land of ours. I've crossed the deserts bare, man, I've breathed the mountain air, man, I've traveled, I've done my share, man, I've been everywhere. And the people I met at truck stops and campgrounds and homeless shelters on that journey all said the same thing: "Al, we need you in Washington." I knew they were right, but first I had to take care of some other business---building the World Trade Center, founding the Audubon Society, doing the clinical research that proved smoking caused cancer, and coming up with the recipe for Mrs. Field's chocolate chip cookies. Finally, I deferred to the demands of the people of Tennessee and allowed them to elect me to the House of Representatives and the Senate, where I established the US Strategic Oil Reserve. And then one winter day nearly nine years ago, for no particular reason, I answered the call of the people once again and took the oath of office as Vice President of the United States. Since then, I've been part of the most successful administration in American history. And, in my spare time, I invented the Internet. Many times Bill Clinton has been pondering some grave decision and has asked me what to do. And when I would give him my thoughts, he would invariable say, "Of course. That's brilliant. Why didn't I think of that?" During the darkest days of the impeachment battle, the president told me he only wished he had listened when I told him to stay away form that dark-haired intern. So after I decided to run for president, I sat down with him and asked if he had any suggestions about how to conduct my campaign. And Bill Clinton gave me a few simple words of advice-words I'll never forget. He looked me in the eye and he said, "Al, just tell the truth, it's always worked for me."

Its not funny, in fact its a really stupid joke! u must be prejudice against americans. U shouldnt post jokes like that.

Very Smart Women 1. I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde. -Dolly Parton 2. You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. -Erica Jong 3. I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for 36 hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours. -Rita Rudner 4. My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. -Rita Rudner 5. I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. -Wendy Liebman 6. Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. -Erma Bombeck 7. If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing 'em. -Sue Grafton 8. I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. -Roseanne Barr 9. I think, therefore I'm single. -Lizz Winstead

Feeling edgy, a man took a hot bath. Just as he became comfortable, the doorbell rang. The man got out of the tub, put on his slippers and robe and went to the door. A salesman at the door wanted to know if he needed any brushes. Slamming the door, the man returned to the bath. The doorbell rang again. On went the slippers and robe, and the man started for the door again. He took one step, slipped on a wet spot, fell backward, and hit his back against the hard porcelain bathtub. Cursing under his breath, the man struggled into his street clothes and with every move a stab of pain, drove to the doctor. After examining him, the doctor said, "You know, you've been lucky. Nothing is broken. But you need to relax... Why don't you go home and take a long hot bath?"

That would have been truly funny if it was the American who thought "I hope we go under another bridge so I can slap the Canadian again!". LOL Actually, it is a fair commentary .. the Canadian could only do his thing in the dark! ;) If you can dish it out, make sure you can take it!

Hahaha..this is very cute. Thanks again for the good laugh :D

Really funny Sissigrl!

Thanks for sharing.That's the best joke I've heard .you have to put another one,because your jokes is wonderful.

I love that, I truly do !!! So nice to hear some clean stuff. Thanks for sharing. Grandmaof2

What a clever Canadian?!.....He really enjoyed the journey.Here we are praying that there is no more tunnel will occur in their journey.Otherwise American face should be fully marked with 'Red mark'..................

hey this is hillatious.........rof

Three pieces of string go into a bar and sit down. The first piece of string walks up to the bar and starts to order. The bartenders asks the string "Are you a piece of string?" Yes, the string replies. "See that sign: No string served here!" The piece of sting goes and sits down. The second piece of string tries to order next. Again the bartender points to the sign and the string goes to sit down. The three pieces of string start to discuss a plan. The third piece of string takes a pair of scissors and cuts the ends of himself into tiny shredded pieces and then ties himself up. The third piece of string then goes up to the bartender. The bartenders again asks "Are you a piece of string?" to which he repies "No, I'm a frayed knot."

Thats funny.

It is fine babe

I must be a dumb american..I don't get it.