Twin Cities People (JOKE)
By sunmin0123
@sunmin0123 (106)
China
February 16, 2007 8:59pm CST
You know you're from the Twin Cities if...
You measure distance in minutes.
Weather is 80% of your conversation.
Snow tires came standard on your car.
You have no concept of public transportation.
75% of your graduating class went to the University of
Minnesota.
You know more than one person who has hit a deer.
You know what and where Dinkytown is.
Perkins was a popular hangout in high school.
You have no problem saying or spelling Minneapolis.
You can list all the Dales.
You hate Fargo (the movie) but realize that a lot of your
family talks that way.
You get mad at people who think Fargo is in Minnesota.
Your school classes have been cancelled because of snow or
cold.
You assume when you say "The Cities" people know what you
are talking about.
You have tried boiled fish in lye at Christmas.
You've licked frozen metal.
The only reason you go to Wisconsin is to get fireworks, to
buy beer on Sundays or you got bad directions.
You wear shorts when it's 50 degrees in March, but bundle up
and complain in August when it goes below 60 degrees.
You know people that have more fishing poles than teeth.
You remember WLOL and WDGY.
When you talk about the opener you are not talking about
cans.
You have gone trick or treating in 3 feet of snow.
You carry jumper cables in your car.
You drink pop, not soda.
Everyone you know has a cabin.
You voted for a pro wrestler for Governor...and he won.
2 responses
@huanghaozi (1472)
• Egypt
17 Feb 07
How Government Works
Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a
desert.
Congress said, "Someone may steal from it at night." So they created a night
watchman position and hired a person for the job.
Then Congress said, "How does the watchman do his job without instruction?" So
they created a planning department and hired two people, one person to write the
instructions, and one person to do time studies.
Then Congress said, "How will we know the night watchman is doing the tasks
correctly?" So they created a Quality Control department and hired two people.
One to do the studies and one to write the reports.
Then Congress said, "How are these people going to get paid?" So they created
the following positions, a time keeper, and a payroll officer, then hired two
people.
Then Congress said, "Who will be accountable for all of these people?" So they
created an administrative section and hired three people, an Administrative
Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal Secretary.
Then Congress said, "We have had this command in operation for one year and we
are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost." So they laid off the
night watchman.
@LilooDallas (61)
• United States
17 Feb 07
President Bush was invited to address a major gathering of the American Indian Nation in Arizona. He spoke for almost an hour on his future plans for increasing every Native American's present standard of living. He referred to his career as Governor of Texas, how he had signed "YES" 1,237 times for every Indian issue that came to his desk for approval. Although the president was vague on the details of his plan, he seemed enthusiastic about his future ideas for helping his "red brothers".
At the conclusion of his speech, the Tribes presented the president with a plaque inscribed with his new Indian name--Walking Eagle. The proud President then departed in his motorcade, waving to the crowds.
A news reporter later inquired to the group of chiefs of how they came to select the new name given to the President. They explained that Walking Eagle is the name given to a bird so full of s**t it can no longer fly.
@trinidadvelasco (11401)
• Philippines
17 Feb 07
I'm a Filipino but I got into your popped joke because it got me curious. I maybe among the very few who is not armed with sufficient knowledge about this twin cities, you know. Nonetheless, it's good I took a peek and learned some facts through your joke.
