Do your referrals influence the topics you start?
By greengal
@greengal (4286)
United States
February 20, 2007 1:29pm CST
I know it sounds totally weird but of late I seem to be thinking more than ever before starting a topic..the reason, my referrals.
You must be wondering how they influence me, its because most of them are close friends and family. I know them very well and they know me too. I can't start topics related to my personal life/family/friends because if my referrals read them , it might offend some and also they get to know more than they should be knowing about me...you got it?
I thought of two topics related to my spouse and one related to my family. I then realized whatever I say in those discussions is perceived to be true (which is) and might give a wrong picture to my friends/family in my referrals.
Now is it only me who feels this way or do your referrals influence your topics even a wee bit? Are you worried about telling the world more than they should know?
13 people like this
22 responses
@rusty2rusty (6763)
• Defiance, Ohio
21 Feb 07
I have fifteen referal. Not one on them posts anymore. So the answer to your question is no. My referrals don't influence what topics I start or how I comment on something.
2 people like this
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
20 Feb 07
Unfortunately none of my friends or family are here on MYlot, they either don't have a computer or don't have the time or inclination to be on this site, which is a pity. I do have a number of referrals but sadly most of them are inactive, I do have one who we message each other regularly and we both give each other ideas on our discussions.
2 people like this
@raenie (705)
• Philippines
21 Feb 07
I haven't really been going full force in my referral campaign (I have an outstanding 1 referral!!) But I do see your point very well, greengal =).
I was even thinking about this recently when I was thinking of being more active in my referrals, because I couldn't help but think that in the back of mind, these close friends & family members would be taken in consideration when I post topics for discussion. And they might even think of why I would be posting such a discussion or something like that. But I guess that sometimes, we just really have to be in the mindset of , "If you want answers,better ask some questions!"...(I gotta admit though, that sometimes this would be every hard to do)
Thanks for posting interesting discussions, greengal! =)
1 person likes this
@raenie (705)
• Philippines
24 Feb 07
That's really nice to know, greengal =) Keep those interesting topics coming! As for me, I still haven't posted as much discussions (also mainly because I'm not able to spend time here as much & I feel kind of bad if I'm not able to respond promptly to those who respond) Hopefully though that I can post more discussions, so as of now, whenever I get the chance to visit mylot, I just reply to other people's discussions =)
@guesswhomsa (1168)
• India
21 Feb 07
it does not affect foe me cos no referrals for me :( so there is no influence for me i just start discussion at my hearts will
@Thomas73 (1467)
• Switzerland
21 Feb 07
As I haven't got any referrals or anyone reading my discussion that I know in real life, I should mention my myLot friends instead. I often write keeping in mind that they are the ones who will most certainly read my posts and wonder how they will respond (most of them do). Some can be quite unpredictable.
1 person likes this
@weemam (13372)
•
20 Feb 07
yes I do worry , I have started to write discussions then thought to myself " no that's too personal " My hubby wouldn't like me to write that so I score it out , It's OK to write funny stories because he can laugh at them too , he is a very private person though . xx
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
20 Feb 07
Well Greengal that is not good then and I agree you have to be very careful there. I have my Daughter on here but I don't have to hide anything as she agrees with me. Unless I was to slag her Dad down which is the EX Husband. She knows what he is like but I am not allowed to say anything lol
@smacksman (6053)
•
21 Feb 07
A good lesson in curbing your emotions, gal.
With a bit more training you could be a real 'stiff upper lip brit'. haha
1 person likes this
@villageanne (8553)
• United States
21 Feb 07
I dont presonally know anyone on mylot but when i start a discussion, I ask myself, "If my duaghters were to join mylot some day, would they be offened by this discussion?" If the answer is yes, i do not publish it. If the answer is no then i start the discussion. I do still worry about telling the world more than they need to know sometimes. I am not sure where to draw the line.
1 person likes this
@greengal (4286)
• United States
21 Feb 07
That's a good way to decide what to post and what not to. I'm constantly thinking about that nowadays since only recently I promoted my link with friends and family. I guess it wasn't such a good idea after all. I hope these referrals become active, then maybe it will be worth it..lol!
@nicolec (2671)
• United States
21 Feb 07
That is exactly why I have not invited any friends or family to this site. I totally understand what you are talking about it would be my fear too. I want complete freedom to talk about what ever I want and not have to worry about my referrels. Because I would.
Luckily, none of my referrals are friends so I don't have to worry about it. They don't know me or my life.
1 person likes this
@retardedrugrat (4791)
• Canada
21 Feb 07
Well, my partner reads everything that I've ever written about him and its caused some major giggle fits at times, but I don't have any referrals so to say that they influence what I write is like saying that Niagara Falls is running dry lol.
@Rexy_leigh (1189)
• Philippines
20 Feb 07
Hi there, we share the same feelings. Yeah, I somehow feel a little hesitant of starting a new discussion coz I got my boyfriend in here, and am afraid he might misinterpret or misquote me in any way. :)
1 person likes this
@ukchriss (2097)
•
25 Feb 07
I only have a couple of referrals so no they dont influence the topics which i start.
@KrisNY (7590)
• United States
6 Mar 07
I know exactly what you mean- It's not as if you are lieing to all of us-- but you don't want to air our everything to the people who know you personally. I agree.. I'm careful with what I write or ask regardless.. I have answered some funny questions-- and then I think what if some of my more serious online friends see this-- will they think less of me? LOL
So yes I know exactly what you mean- I have not referred anyone just for that reason!
1 person likes this
@hopeful28 (1439)
• Singapore
1 Mar 07
I get what you mean. My sister is also on myLot but she is the one who referred me and I usually will not post anything about myself that I don't want her to know about. As for my referrals, I have nine, but none of them are active any more. Woe.
@willocfc (963)
• Australia
1 Mar 07
I can understand how this would become a problem and this is one of the reasons i haven't referred anyone i know personally in the offline world. I like to keep my posts real and honest and i think i would be more prone to holding back if i knew there were certain people that might be reading them, so i keep mylot separate from my reality to avoid that
1 person likes this
@laurencekyut (53)
• Philippines
21 Feb 07
oohhh! YES! they do influence me in some way,that way is that when i start a topic there response is somewhat funny. because they know me! but right now i aint tagging them good reponse because i dont want to offend one of them.
1 person likes this
