Is it wrong?

Don't take this the wrong way (and don't give me a negative rating simply because you disagree with me), but it's not about you or what you think. It's not about what we think either. Your friend wants a child, but doesn't want a relationship. Your other friend wants to help her achieve this goal, but that's the extent of it. It would be no different if she went down to sperm donation clinic and was inseminated only this method will likely be more cost effective. If she has the financial ability to raise a child on her own, then she has that right. Besides, I know a lot of single mothers who do a fantastic job, and I know a lot of so-called families where the father has absolutely no interest in the kids and treats them like dirt. Which is better for the child in those situations? If it were me, I'd be supportive of my friend and leave my own personal judgements out of it.

I think alot rides on how mature your friend is. Where she is in her life. What shes doing. How stable her life is, ect. Alot of people want kids because they want the love that comes with being a parent. But i dont think they fully understand the difficulties as well. This is a situation where its hard to say what is right and isnt. Your friend wants to be a mother, she obviously thinks she will be a good mom. Shes probably prepared her life in ways to be a mom. And just because she hasnt met "the one" or "Mr. Right" dosent mean that she wont be a wonderful mom and give her child everything that he or she deserves. I saw a talk show once, a woman had 2 children, both by anonmouse sperm donars, she was a single mom, but gave everything to her kids. They were loved and had everything they could want. This could be a situation that could work for your friend. Growing up without a father isnt as terrible as people can imagine. I didnt have one, it hasnt hurt im image of men, it hasnt harmed me. Sure i missed out on some things, but i think my mom did her best to make up for them. If two sensble adults want to make this arrangement, i dont think its anyones place to judge them. Maybe later in life the sperm donor would be willing to know the child. Im sure the child is going to eventually want to know where he or she came from, and who thier father is. Then that again would be a situation for the mother and sperm donor to work out. I guess i dont see anything wrong with the situation. I would be supportive and encouraging to my friend. Maybe this situation would work out for them. Maybe on meeting the potential parents would decide that they dont want to do this. I do know however, that if she does, and when she finds her Mr Right, he will love that child no matter who the father is...

I think it sounds like kids are being treated like fun litle pets to have

whether or not you feel its wrong is irrelevant. you're not the one that is going to be living through it. how old is your friend? do think she is honestly ready to be a mother, or is it just that she might be a bit envious of all the mothers around her? do you think she FULLY understands what her life will be like as a single mother? what she will have to stop doing, things she will have to give up? you shouldnt refrain from introducing them just because you think it is wrong. BUT you should perhaps sit down with her and her parents and have a long discussion about it before you introduce them. try not to make the disucssion into a "reasons you shouldnt do this" speech, but instead make it plain to her that her life will CHANGE and give her the good along with the bad. also make sure you point out to her what you said above..." that a child needs both a mother and a father" not only in creation, but in growing up. while the child wont suffer "damage" without a father, he/she will certainly be missing out. try to get her to imagine what her childhood would have been like without her father. good luck!

I think there's nothing wrong in our society to be a single parent. Unfortunately, it's not unusual nowadays. I think that if your friend is ready to grow up a child alone, then it's a good way for her dream to have a baby to come true. On the other hand, she might meet someone in future who will make a great father for her child. Well, there are so many singles and divorced...

I think that your friend should wait until she finds the right partner of her life and then she can have how many kids she wants..so tell her to be patient and everything will fall in its places..what is the use of a sperm of a man who is not ready to take the responsibility of the child...so please be patient.

This really isn't an ideal situation for your friend to bring a child into.She may be clucky because as you say several of her friends have babies.Perhaps one of you should allow her to babysit for a while and then she will have an idea of what having a baby is all about.If she is having this child just to avoid working then that is wrong.If I were you I wouldn't get involved because if things go wrong you are the one that will be stuck in the middle.

It shoudln't matter as long as the child is going to be well cared for by the family that s/he has. It doesn't always take two parents to raise a child. A lot of children of single parents do just fine! I don't see a problem here.

no i don't think it's wrong. it's actually really sweet. he may not want to be in the child's life but he's just a sperm donor so your friend probably wouldn't want him in the child's life either. since they don't have any kind of relationship. as long as she is able to afford the child and afford to give it a good life then i see no problem with this.

I dont think she has thought about deeply enough,(there is so many complications that could come along with this situation) maybe she just feels left out because she hasnt got a baby, but this might be just a phase and what happens when she gets pregnant, will the novelty wear off ?.I think its wrong, yeah the doner might want nothing to do with the child now, but what in 10 years or so ? This situation sounds dodgy from the beginning, let her find a true partner. This is totally unfair the innocent child. It sounds very selfish.

In this situation my first question will be, how capable is your friend in taking care of a baby? As you, yourself have a baby or babies, you know that it is not easy, taking care of a baby, working and still be able to do what she wants so how ready do you think your friend is? If you think she is, then I think you should support her all the way. If you're in doubt, I guess you better talk to your friend, heart to heart and woman to woman, ask her if it is what she really wants, tell her the truth regarding parenting and raising children, how it would change/affect her life. Let her think about it 1,000,000 times before actually going thru with it. If you're ok with it, let her take care of your baby for a bit, and for real, let her change diapers, clean up poop, feed your baby, of course you'll be there to supervise, but let her get a feel of how it is to take care of a baby for real. She may change her mind once confronted with the reality of having and taking care of a child. Specially on her own. Hope this helps ^_^

What is the age of your friend? Why she's so desperate like that? Is she has no suitor? Raising a child needs not only the care of one person rather by the two person that is the concept of marriage for me. There is nothing to rush I believe her time will come to have a family. Talk to your friend to think it first, if she will do it she must ready to face all the consequnces attributed to it.

Yes it is a completely different situation, Silphil. First of all the sperm donnor wants to cause a human being to be birthed into this world without any commitment towards the raising and training of the child. Not even any financial support. That's screwed up. There's too many fatherless children being born that way. Then the woman; why does she really want a child. Is it only for envy? Raising a child requires more than just 21 years. It's a lifetime commitment.

It really depend if your friend who want a child and your g ay friend gets along well enough to spend the rest of their lives connected with a child.

If you think that your friend is capable enough to be a mother emotionally, physically and financially...why not. If she's willing to take the consequences of being a single mother. I think she should just find a partner that she'll be with in the rest of her life. A partner that she can start a family and more babies if she wants. The decision is still hers, goodluck!

Is your friend financially stable? If she were to lose her job would be she able to support the baby until she was able to find another? Is she emotionally stable? Does she want a baby because all of her friends have one, and she doesn't? There are some important questions that need to be answered first, before I would be willing to get involved in a set-up like this.

I wouldn't set it up if i was you. If it didn't work out you wouldn't want to be responsible for a lot of unhappy people. It could work out great, but it isn't worth the risk, if you want my opinion.

i think that you should look at your female friend and think if she could be a single mum, if u think she would also need a father figure for her cgild then tell her your opinion tell her. but if you think she could do it then help her, either way she will probably want a child. you also need to think if she wants a child because SHE really wants one or because her frinds have one.

The fact that you started by saying "Me and a few of my friends have babies" is a bad sign. Really really not a good idea. Does she just want to have a baby out of jealousy? It's not a smart thing to do. I have two kids myself, 3 and 5, having a baby will not fulfill her. She needs to wait.

Being a single parent today isn't what it use to be. Families have changed ten fold in the last few generations. If you feel your friend would make a good mother and parent to a child as a single mother, it might be important to support her decision or eventually lose her friendship if she chooses to go ahead and have a child.