bad day

Canada
March 2, 2007 6:44pm CST
i get so stressed out over money. i bought a car from my best friend. she knows i don't have a lot of money, she told me it was better for her not to get all of the money at once cause she'd just blow it so it was better to pay a little every month. well this month i have given her $700 dollars allready. i still owe her $500. anyway, every week she calls asking for money. she only expected $200 a month and now after giving her 700 this month she just called me tonight asking me for money. i just gave her the last 100 3 days ago. she made me feel terrible that i couldn't afford to pay today. but we had an agreement of only a couple hundred a month. i've been scrounging money for a month now. i got paid the other day and i bought my daughter something, it's the first thing i've botten in a month and a half so i can afford to give her as much as i can. anyway i know i keep blabbing but things like this just get me so stressed. not sure what to do now.
7 people like this
30 responses
@mfpsassy (2827)
• United States
3 Mar 07
Always get an agreement in writing even with friends, make sure you are getting a receipt from her each time you give her money. Sounds to me like see is hounding you because you told her about your tax return. When you talk to her again tell her sorry but you are going to have to stick to your agreement and she will have to wait until next moth for her next payment.
1 person likes this
• Canada
3 Mar 07
thanks, i know i should of had a written down agreement. you always hear about these things happenning. even though she is my best friend i guess you can't really trust anyone.
1 person likes this
@mfpsassy (2827)
• United States
3 Mar 07
Not when it comes to money, especially people who have a hard time hanging on to thier money.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Mar 07
I dont make deals of any type with friends or family anymore. Its a really fast way to find out who is not as loyal and loving as you thought. At least you got it paid off. Did she give you a clear title yet?
1 person likes this
• Canada
3 Mar 07
yes i have the title. the car is allready in my name and everything is done.
@sizzle3000 (3036)
• United States
5 Mar 07
I am sorry to say that you should never borrow money from friends or buy cars from them either. No matter how well the intent is it always ends bad. I have seen so many friendships go by the way side because of money. The other thing is to always get it in writting I don't care who you are buying a car from. Once the agreement is in writing you can say look I just don't have the extra money but I will have it by the next payment. Good luck
@suspenseful (40193)
• Canada
3 Mar 07
In hindsight, it would have been better to have gotten it in writing and the next time go through a dealer. The trouble with friends is that they see when you go out for a cup of coffee or go to a restaurant, when you get new shoes, or anything and think "that should have gone on the car." I am sure she noticed what you bought your daughter. That's until you get the car paid off that you refrain from buying anything other than the necessities. Get it paid off quickly and never ever borrow money from a friend or an acquaintance for that matter.
• Canada
3 Mar 07
but the thing is she knows i didn't go anywhere for a month because i couldn't afford it. she asked me to put in two dollars for something and i said i couldn't afford it. anyway this month i bought my daughter shoes but she needed new shoes, nothing i can do about that. i didn't spend money either on them cause they went onto my credit card so it wasn't money that came out of my pocket that should have gone towards the car.
@Starline (681)
• United States
3 Mar 07
Your friend is a jerk, If she said a couple of hundred a month, thats all that you should have to pay!!
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Mar 07
some friend like the person below said get in writting..anything monitary done with friends is a bad idea anyway. The next time you need something and I know in alot of places a car is nessasary, but this is a lesson you will never forget. Don't enter into deals with this friend and I hope you have kept track of all the money you have given her and I hope you got the title as well...beware because this can turn around on you especially since she keeps asking for money when the original agreement was for $200 a month. Get you title and don't give her the last of the money untill it's signed and noterized and in your hand. Please don't give her the last of the money untill you have all your paper work.
• Canada
3 Mar 07
thanks for the advice. i allready have the car and it's in my name so really all she can do is wait. the reason i won't get mad at her is because she's done so much and has allready given me the car even though it hasn't been completely paid off so i can't really be mad at her for doing so much for me.
@nandans (1160)
• India
3 Mar 07
It happens sometime, part of life... please don't worry
1 person likes this
@mzbubblie (3839)
• United States
3 Mar 07
That's something I discover along time ago from watching alot of court tv shows, when you and a friend make a agreement, get it in writing because you never know when they may flip the script and go outside what you both agreed upon. Hopefully, she will stop asking and go with what you both agreed on and not make you feel bad about it. You did the right thing your priorities are first your child and she should understand and respect that... Good luck to you
@dfinster (3528)
• United States
3 Mar 07
I don't think you should feel bad at all. You've already given her way more than the 2 of you had agreed to each month. If you ask me, I think she's the one being a pain and she should feel bad for harping on you constantly.
1 person likes this
@jbrowsin66 (1321)
• United States
3 Mar 07
I thought everyone knew this rule... NEVER buy a car from a friend. If you didn't know this rule before, I guess you do now, lol. It seems something always goes wrong and then it's the end of a beautiful friendship. I would remind her that she expected only $200 a month and tell her that's all you can handle possibly handle right now (according to your agreement). If you owe her $500 it won't be long til she's off your back.
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Mar 07
Doesnt sound like Your friend is much of a Friend. Get some new friends. And treat Your Daughter once in a while. Dont be streesed just relax and take a deep breathe. good luck
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Mar 07
If she is really your best friend than she should understand when you tell that you just dont have the money, and thats why you all worked out this agreement in the first place. But tell her you will pay her the remainder of the debt ASAP, because she obviously feels like she needs it now. Money would be a terrible thing to lose a friendship over.
1 person likes this
@bondplok (139)
• Italy
3 Mar 07
you should just keep on going.. everything..i hope....will be ok :) good luck!!!
1 person likes this
@crazylady (470)
• United States
3 Mar 07
Ever watch Judge Judy? A lot of those people had written or verbal agreements over money. People view friendship differently. Your friend seems to think she can change the rules. I would remind her about your agreement. You will have the rest later. Don't make yourself sick over it. If she gets ignorant, I would question your friendship with her. You cannot leave yourself strapped- what if something happens to the car, and you have no money to fix it. KWIM? After this...I would refrain from money deals with friends...or at least get it in writing, and signed by a notary. Business is business.
1 person likes this
@gsnarayanan (1704)
• India
3 Mar 07
It shows even with friends we should enter in to written agreements before execution of ay financial deals. I hope you have learnt a lesson.
1 person likes this
• Pakistan
3 Mar 07
pay ur debt as soon as possible and always remember frieds should never be involved in major financial matters it just ruins ur friendship because when i comes to money everybody has different priorities
1 person likes this
@tad1fan (3367)
• Canada
3 Mar 07
Tell your g/f the truth....she's stressing you out!Remind her of the agreement you two had,a couple hundred a month,and than politely remind her of what you've given her,this month alone and that you,yourself are scrounging to make ends meet now.....if she doesn't understand this,she's not a 'true' friend......don't forget,we have 'friends' who are there for us and than we have 'acquaintences' who just make our life hell....
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Mar 07
Don't let her pressure you into having to pay more than what was agreed upon. She probably spent all the money you gave her already and that's why she's asking you for more. Stick to the agreement and pay her accordingly. I know it's hard and you probably have to hear lots from her in the coming months but if that's all you can afford, then there is not much you can do. Just remember that all deals, even with the bestest of friends, have to be in writing and everything has to be noted so there will be no disagreements later on. I hope you manage to settle this soon. I know how stressful money issues can be.
1 person likes this
• India
3 Mar 07
hey it's really bad. she should not have done this
1 person likes this
3 Mar 07
Yes its a world wide problem a shortage of money,its not worth getting upset about,just renemeber that nothing matters much,and most things dont matter at all,a wise way to live a life.
1 person likes this