What would you believe???
By chaygylmommy
@chaygylmommy (2470)
United States
March 11, 2007 8:36pm CST
I am watching Dateline NBC from tonight. I Tivo'd it and am watching it now that the kids are in bed. The story is about a woman who is fighting for the innocence of her husband. He went out one night drinking with some buddies and left her home with a sick kid. She was mad at him, but the got home around 240am. The next morning, police come in and say that he murdered his mother in law and raped and beat the 7 yr old niece. The niece identified him saying "it looked like uncle clarence". He was convicted, but he turns out to be innocent. Anyhow, it took 8 years and this woman was shunned from her family, lost her mother, and her husband, etc. My question is...would you believe him? I mean, the evidence wasn't that great they said, but the little girl saying she knew who it was. I love my husband dearly and I just KKNOW that he would never do something like this, but what if...would I be so willing to stand behind him when everyone else is against him? This woman did her own detective work to find out the real killer and rapist. As I said, I know my husband is not capable of this, but with so much against me, I just don't know what i would do. Would you turn over and just think well I just didn't know my husband as well as i thought? or would you stand up KNOWING? Myself, I am not sure. These days you hear so much about men hiding who they really are for years and years.
This may be saying a lot about me. Maybe I am not a very good wife...but I honestly don't know if I could say that I would be SO strong in my convictions. I admire this woman. What do you think?
4 people like this
7 responses
@cachitodemialma (1313)
• United States
12 Mar 07
well Im wondering why on earth a 7 year old would lie about something like that? I think if a young child came to me saying something like that I would have no choice but to believe them. I dont think a child that young is capable of telling lies like that. If I found out that my significant other did something like this I couldnt stand by him. I wouldnt care what kind of wife people thought I was...I would rather people thought I was a better daughter & auntie for standing up for them & believing in them. As a mother, I wouldnt want that type of man around my children anyways.
1 person likes this
@chaygylmommy (2470)
• United States
12 Mar 07
yes, but if you read the discussion carefully, the man is innocent..after 8 years on jail ONLY because of his wife. The niece identified him by saying it looked like her uncle. 2 years later, she changed her story, but the judge wouldn't do another review of the case. she never said it WAS her uncle...only that it LOOKED like her uncle.
@cachitodemialma (1313)
• United States
12 Mar 07
either way the situation would suck. I dont think I could ever fully trust should a child point him out. It's a situation that I dont mess with. As a mother I dont take a chance ever...I dont think for a second my boy is capable of ever doing this but honestly Id find it hard to NOT believe a child in this type of a situation.
1 person likes this
@chaygylmommy (2470)
• United States
12 Mar 07
I agree. I would be really hard put with an ID from anyone. And, I am a mom, too and I would definatly believe my kid. Man, it would be hard to believe and it would be hard no to believe. THanks for your input, though :)
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
15 Mar 07
wow...that is totally intense and as much as I love my husband and trust him etc etc I can honestly say that if it had been us...I really dont know what i would do! I would want to believe him and in my soul I would believe him BUT psychologically, I couldnt...I would see him as a murderer and rapists and would have a very difficult and heavy war goin on in my head...omg I dont even want to think about it because I really would be seriously torn over it...And yes admiration for this woman is definately in order!
1 person likes this
@chaygylmommy (2470)
• United States
15 Mar 07
YES! Exactly my thoughts! You hit the nail on the head. I would never ever WANT to believe it, but I'm not sure that I could.
@villageanne (8553)
• United States
12 Mar 07
I would believe my husband. We have a wonderful relationship and I trust him completely. I would not give up on him nor would I stop believing in his words. I know him better than anyone else in the world knows him. We have been married for nearly 29 years and we do everything together. Yes, I would stand up for him.
@chaygylmommy (2470)
• United States
12 Mar 07
See, I am on the same level; however, there are just so many people (men and women) out there that hide who they are for years. I just don't know...I think I would stand by my husband, but with so many people pushing me and shunning me, I just might change my mind. Her family did reconcile with her after a couple of years though and all. Her niece said that she didn't think it was her uncle after all. he is innocent afterall.
@Aussies2007 (5336)
• Australia
13 Mar 07
Ooooh! A detective story...
As much as I love trusting people... I had so many desapointments in my life... that I have come to the conclusion that you cannot really fully trust anyone... not even your own parents. It is not so much that they lie... but it is the way that they try to manipulate you.
About your story...
The story does not hold water...
1)Why kill the mother in law... and not the niece after he raped her... Why would you leave a witness behind after having already killed someone... makes no sense to me... only a mad man would do such a thing... and the husband is not mad.
2) If the husband was out drinking... how come he does not have an alibi... surely... someone saw him at the place he was drinking.
3) When a 7 year old child tells you... "he looked like uncle Clarence"... it means just that... someone who looked like him. If it was him... she would have know for sure that it was him.
4) All in all... I think the police did a very poor job in this case. And it is quite common for the police to do so. Rather than investigating... they simply took the words of a child for granted. Very poor.
@chaygylmommy (2470)
• United States
13 Mar 07
those are exactly the points the wife made. :) it turned out to be a pedophile neighbor and it took 8 years for him to be caught but ONLY because the wife did the investigation. Thank you for your thoughts and your points. :)
@ScrappinHappyMom (914)
• United States
12 Mar 07
I think I would believe my husband esp. since the little girl just said it looked like Uncle. I mean my daughter thinks every middle aged blond that is partically bald is her uncle.
I think that I would have to love and trust that the man I married and had a family with would not lie about something like this.
But it is very scary to think about.
1 person likes this
@lullabell (436)
• United States
12 Mar 07
Oh wow, i can't believe i missed this. I am sure my boyfriend wouldn't be capable of this either.
Now, that being said, wife after wife of cereal killers and rapists say the same. They were sure he couldn't and wouldn't. After leaving my ex-hubby, I say all the time as i look back, he very well could have had a whole life i did not know about. We were together for 11 yrs. I was sure i knew him well. Today if some one came forward and told me he had a secret room some where "things" happened i wouldn't be too suprised. People who are sick don't always show that side except when they are acting out. This is not always with the people they live the rest of their life with. Often the things they fantisize about are things they are ashamed of and so they are sure to keep that life seperate. look at all of the cases of child molestation by thier own parent the other parent often will not know. A child is a child and if mine came to me or another came to me and there was no beneficial reason to thier claim of beating and rape, i am sure i will be on the child's side no matter what my heart said. I would probably do my own exhausting research too try to prove otherwise, but to me these are cases of guilty until proven innocent.
@crazynurse (7482)
• United States
12 Mar 07
I would believe and stand by my husband. I know he wouldn't be capable of this type of act. But no matter what it was I would stand by him.
1 person likes this
