revenge, forgive or forget???
By shadow9
@shadow9 (238)
Romania
March 13, 2007 5:49am CST
ok well here's the story: i have loved a girl for months but she didn't really care about me for a while but still she always gave me hope and i always belived her(maybe stupid but if theres one thing that can't be controled that's love) ... after around 4 months she started likeing me so some time after she became my girl firend (i was probabli the happyest man on earth:P) for a week i coulden't even belive it and thought that the dream would never end ... we stayed together for 2 months an 1 week and the she asked for a "break"(pause), she sayd that she needs to figure out what she is feeling and to see if she cares for me as a brother or a boyfrined(ya right), i had no idea why or what was going on but sill i agreed(not like i had a choice) and she started acting and being really weird and cold so after a week i asked her to tell me the truth and what's going on ... so she sayd that she got bored of haveing a boyfriend and that she only want's to have fun and stuff like that(almost killed myself) but that wasn't all ... after 2 days some of my friends told me that they saw her whith some other guy kissing and stuff(the killing part directed itself in another direction...) but i held on ... it's been around 2 weeks since we broke up and weirdly enough she still tries to talk to me and want's to make me get out of my house and stuff, at first i really didn't get it but then i found out that one of her best friens "loves" me(i don't really like her and the thought of seeing my x-gf every day whit someone else...) ... so i don't know what to do, i have some good plans for revenge one of witch is to get whit her best friend and make her suffer and that way she would be broke to ... unfortunenly i can't really do that i guess ... or i could just ignore her(witch would be bad because she couldn't stand it) but not so shure i can do that either ... so should i find a way for revenge ... forgive her and remain "friends"?(don't think so but:-??) or forget her and everithing that she done(kinda hard)? ... what would you do? (ideas for revenge are welcomed to:):P )
(sorry fr the writeing)
2 people like this
28 responses
@keep_onwatch (2680)
• India
14 Mar 07
I would proabably give a good scolding rather lecture to make her feel how she hurt me and also how shameless it is for her to behave like that..........well as you said you cant forget her nor can you ever be friends wuth her coz i know you cant,,but revenge idea i am out of it let thenm reap their own grains..in time she ll get agood lesson from above .i suggest you stay out of that...."an eye for an eye and a tooth for atooth makes the whole world go blind!"I really suggest you get her out of your head and for that get yourself some one else may be just sa afriend and god knows things can proceed.there are other fish in the sea....Y should yo care for some 1 so uncaring....get on with your life and find some one else and soon you ll forget her and all about her ..dont indulge in her thoughts..all the best...
@babynanan (133)
• Philippines
14 Mar 07
Well, if I were to decide. You should not do some revenge coz no matter what's the reason for that, maybe its good or not It will still be a karma to you. Always remember love begets love and revenge begets revenge. So whatever you do, it will still go back to you a hundred times. And even though you do some revenge, you will still not gain peace and happiness coz deep inside your heart you know that you don't love her and you are not true to her.
But I admire you for your love to her. It's one of a kind. It's like a handful of guys who are like you nowadays. I think you should forgive her. I know it's hard but once you accepted it and struggle for it, it will just be very easy. Divert your attention to other things like sports or etc. I've been through a lot of pains already, I am not saying that I am an expert but If I could do it before, Y can't you.. ryt?! Just believe in yourself. Someday, your partner will come and will sweep you off your feet. If you don't want to be friends with her coz you can't then it's totally okay, it's normal! But then don't ever do some revenge with other girls coz at the end, you will still be the one who will be hurt..
Love and be loved!! :)
1 person likes this
@randommusicgirl (80)
• Philippines
14 Mar 07
"I have some good plans for revenge one of which is to get with her bestfriend and make her suffer and that way she would be broke too"
WOW. You just made yourself sound more like a loser.
No offense meant dude. But why would you use her bestfriend? It wasn't her fault if your ex-girlfriend broke up with you.
But if you think you're the "all-that-kind-of-a-guy" then do it, just make sure she won't get over you, make sure they won't realize what a loser and that you had to use someone else to hurt your ex-girlfriend, because if they did, you will surely get a hard laugh from them.
I know you got hurt and it will surely take a while to get over it, but try to move one. Now if you really love the girl and want to hurt her or have her back, the only thing you should do is to prove to her that she was wrong to let you go. And if you did, eventually, she will realize how stupid she was for letting someone like you slip from her grip.
@shadow9 (238)
• Romania
14 Mar 07
:P i know ... it was just 1 thought that came along at first because she cares for her friends alot and it whould break her alot ... but i am not going to do that, i know she has no implication so there's no point in that ... i'm not going to be like her im going to be the opposite ... thanks for responding
@sadgirl_1958 (1088)
• United States
14 Mar 07
I know this sounds harsh - but you need to let go. The best thing you can do for yourself and for her is to just ignore her. When she contacts you - let her know in very specific terms that her contact is no longer welcomed. Trust me, this pain will go away. It is amazing - but the heart does heal. We are able to move on - we are able to meet other people and fall in love again! The heart is a very resilient organ. This lady did not play fair with you- she used your emotions to her advantage. In that regard, she was rather cold to you. My mother always told me "What goes around - comes around." So one day, she will find her heart broken by someone too! On this you can count! Forget her and move on with your life. It is okay to have pain for a while - but then it comes time to go out and "smell the flowers" again! Good luck!
1 person likes this
@cuteyasoi17 (155)
• Philippines
14 Mar 07
no matter how big a sin a person has done to you...you must not take revenge...and if so, you'll easily get wrinkles all over your face, want some?!
1 person likes this
@smilyanita (17)
• China
14 Mar 07
Forget her is the most wisdom choice . She is not worth your love . there will be more good girls over the world .
1 person likes this
@xfallenxlostx (2074)
• United States
14 Mar 07
Hurting her friend is NOT the answer. Then you are destorying an innocent person's life. Just ignore the b itch who hurt you. She will hate that and it will be revenge enough.
@kurtbiewald (2625)
• United States
13 Mar 07
unless someone was intentionally hurting you, and sometimes even if, revenge is just stupid. It solves nothing and creates more problems for everybody.
I had one like that for 3 years, mostly in my mind I guess. My own damn fault I figure. I needed somebody to love me, really badly, she was there nurturing and being kind, because I was paying mostly I think. It got very complex for me (and her I think) when some very real feelings were there, both ways I think. She made and makes me VERY happy. Just who she is and how she is.
Don't ever forget though. Both good and bad. Don't get hurt in the same way twice. If she is pulling you toward her, or a push pull thing, then getting with other guys its really evil. She has a very big problem if she is doing that. Having a problem like that is punishment enough I think. Must be hellish. Anyway, I have been thinking about that sort of thing. People get mistreated and abused so then they do it to other poeple. The best thing we can do is to think and break that cycle. Just deal with it, accept that she has a problem. If she is honest and up front about it, try to help her. If she just takes and takes and then throws away what you give, even the best you can give. Then give less next time or maybe avoid her.
The best revinge is just to live a good healthy happy life. Just live well. DOn't plot revenge. Don't date anyone just to get back at someone. Its bound to backfire.
Be real be honest , ask for what you want and need, maybe then you get it.
@shadow9 (238)
• Romania
13 Mar 07
indeed, you are right ... she is one of those people whit problems ... she has no idea what she wants or feels and she keeps confuseing herself ... i tryed to help her but she never listens ... she probably "feels"(actualy that's what she thinks, shes not that conected to what she really feels) something for me, and also for others ... but theres nothing i can do anymore ... i'll forget about her and still that would ber revenge, unwillingly ... but it's the only thing i can do because she never listens ... thanks for the response
@anshuman4u (6)
•
14 Mar 07
well as we all know that revenge is never be good idea.
whether it will give us a momantarily pleasure.
because that pleasure or satisfaction is not for whole time after some time we feel guilty and this may also lead us to some other sufferings.
if you seriously want to take revenge then forget him/her.and ignore them as much as possible.this will make u hard from fighting to the revenge feelings and u can easily be recoverd from those feelings.
@juliaandrea_a (349)
• Philippines
14 Mar 07
if i were you i will forgive her but not forget the things she had done for you... it will make you a better and stronger person in your future relationship.
@suryapal (36)
• India
14 Mar 07
is you are thinking about to take revenge than you are the person who can't be a lover or you may say the black spot on the name of lover and if you want to forget that than you was not in love with her that was only a infatuation but if you are going to forgive her than you are a true lover and you are a great person and this may get your love back
@wildhorse (1293)
• Egypt
14 Mar 07
Just try to forget, forgivness may be hard but it comes with time, just move on with your life, revange would not do you any good..
@kool78 (490)
• India
13 Mar 07
before i finished reading the entire thing i was shocked to see your break up reason.....and then it was more shocking to see thats she wanted to see whether she cares for you as a "BROTHER" or boyfriend. Didnt she think that before dating you....she is a real bi*** man ....i seriously cant tell anything without knowing your age dude...but if you are below 22 then this is the part and parcel of life. All guys do the same with girls....and do we care a damn then...Ypu are hurt because you truly loved her ....u should have know where your relation was heading from the begning itself.....but know one has rights to play with our lifes....You should put down that girl once in your life or u will always feel low when you see her. The suitation is always bad if you really loved the person truly. If u really loved her and since you have been wih her for 4 months you will know the best what will bring her down...feel guilty...something that she cant bear.......if she was your first love then u can never forget her even if u hook up with someone else also later in your life.
Even when you take revenge u wont hurt her bad because u really cant when u love a person too much. But if u feel like dropping her to your feet once then do it... u will feel good
@countdown21 (111)
• United States
14 Mar 07
Hi,
Forgive, forgive, forgive. Anything else will ruin you. Revenge won't change things and bitterness will eat you up while she moves on. You will not be able to forget but genuine forgiveness will be the best in the long run. Why would you stress over someone who doesn't want you. You are unique and someone right for you is out there. Don't sell yourself short. Love can only be true when it goes both ways.
Time will prove that this too shall pass.
countdown21.com
@layamaria (102)
• Philippines
13 Mar 07
Well, you know what they say...
..."forgetting is the best revenge."
:)
@teamfreddy (150)
• Mexico
13 Mar 07
Don't lower yourself to the level of a spoiled child. This lady is not worth your attention and negative thoughts will only get you to a lower self esteem. Focus your energy in a totally different direction. On the Caribbean islands we learn very early that there are more "fish" in the sea. In other words, there are more women in this world and you need 2 to tango. Love is a two way street. So give yourself some time, there will be another lady walking into your life that will make you spin on your feet.......and NEVER mention to her this past experience, as it is bad business to build on old relationships.
@longhong (20)
• China
14 Mar 07
If I were you ,I would forget .becuase It is not worthy forgiving her,let she know you are ok even though she don't together with you,I guess she will regret about this.tomorrow is another day ,there are so many good girls in the world ,why don't you live happeier.it is just my opinion,you must consider about it by yourself
@limalimon (638)
• Mexico
13 Mar 07
the best thing that you can do is ignore her!! she will be confused if you ignore every phone call o sms.
she will looking you
