Over Bearing Friends

OMG I feel for you...luckily you ENJOY spending time with her...I had a friend that I've known for nearly 20 yrs and we USED to be like that (have fun together etc) but the past few yrs its been just draining dealing with her because she'd ahve me on the phone at LEAST once a day (usually 2 or more times though) for a few hours at a time and ALL we did was deal with her problems..and it was the SAME PROBLEMS over and over and over....she NEVER listened to my advice until after the fact then she'd go "I know you were right" but turn around and do the same stupid thing all over again!!! I was forever bending over backwards for this person emotionally, mentally and even finacially! then last fall she stabbed me in the back and I dumped her...My hsuband wants nothign to do with her at all anymore....he'd had enough a couple yrs ago but this last thing was the final straw.... Actually I've had 3 different friends that I've completely cut ties with because they took up far too much of my time, they were draining and actually (hindsight is 20/20) they THRIVED on the drama!! Its pathetic...whats worse is they dragged their kids into these dysfunctional worlds and now the kids ae all screwed up too!!... Now that I've ranted (sorry for hijacking your thread there)....Your best bet IMO is to sit her down and tell her something like "look, you know i love ya, you KNOW I wouldnt do anything to hurt you and I always love talking to you but we need to tame it down alittle cause I'm getting far too caught up in OUR time and not dealing with my family and my familys time ya know.....I'm NOT abandoning you! I'm NOT mad at you! i'm NOT trying to or even wanting to end our friendship at all..I just need to get back on track with my family/life/home/etc" or do you think she'd not understand what you are trying to say?

Just explain to her that while you enjoy your chats and your friendship, you have other tasts that need to be done, such as housework etc. Tell her what you have time for, and that's that. Tell her that if you say you have to go and she protests, you're simply going to hang up. If she puts you to the test, HANG UP, so she knows you're not bluffing. If she questions you about it, tell her that you've already told her you don't have all the time in the world, and that it was her problem for not listening to you and respecting that. you need to set some boundaries with your friend, and FAST!!!! Ask her how many times YOU have called and done that to her? None, because you respect her life, and don't wish to take her time up as she has taken yours. You do have a life besides her.