How do you remain a true friend to someone with a chronic illness?

actually he's not only my friend..he's my boyfriend.. currently undergoing chemotheraphy.. but the problem is his family hiding him from me..or he's the one hiding... our communications stop when he started his chemo and when his family found out that we have such communications..his family change his contact number.. what will i do if i want to be with my man although he's ill but they are hiding him from me? ANYWAY WELCOME TO MYLOT

At this point in their life your friend really needs you, but they also need you to understand that yes they are tired alot more often and no they won't be able to do things they used to do. A true friend is the one that will come over and wash your hair after you've laid in bed for two days. When my brother and father went through cemo we were there to clean up and help around the house. Friends would send cards to let them know they were thinking of them. Sometimes when you're sick you don't want people around you, but you do want to know that they care.

well i have both situations going on for me right now..myself i am disabled andhave degenerative disc disease,arthristis..and a very bad back..and i have a best friend that just went threw brain surgery for a huge tumor they found in her head..and she has been fighting to live and heal ...so we understand each other..and we have the bets friendship anyone could have and we are constantly there for each other for empathy,sympathy,and encouragement threw what we have been going thrrew,,

I have friends with problems and I also have chronic illness so I know how this is. As someone who has chronic pain and problems it can be very frustrating to make plans and then find out you just can't do them, you wake up in a lot of pain or what have you. I know for myself it can be very depressing to try and do something and then find out nope not able to. Let alone if you also let someone else down because of it. I would suggest just keeping things simple. If you want to do something together make it simple. Something you know they can do. For example visiting at their house and maybe watching a movie or going to a restaurant for coffee. It's little things that make people feel special. The fact that you are willing to stay friends, to make adjustments, to be understanding and supportive means more to them then you might realize.

I pay them visits. We can have good talk about the past and the adventures we have had. I bring some food items which we can cook while conversing. When it is time for her to have her rest, I do some light massages from the head down to the feet. Then I say my goodbyes. If she asks me to come back on a date which could be the birthday of a loved one, I try my best to be around.

When I was 16, my best friend was diagnosed with Cancer. It was in her spine and it finally took her life when she was just 21. I would always visit her 3 or 4 times a week in the hospital and take her chocolate custard as theis was all she could eat with the treatment she was having. Sadly she shut all of her friends out which really upset me. I would always ring her parents and they would keep me up to date. Her parents would always tell me thats its nothing that I had ever done wrong, it was just the fact that she was like this with everyone. Everyone including her parents thought that she was doing ok. I was so shocked when her Dad rang me and told me that she had passed away. It still hurts so much that I never got the chance to see her for 4 months before she passed and especially that I never got to say goodbye. I still think of her most days and will always miss our good times.

I have some of these illnesses but to be honest my friends don't see me in pain much , If I am honest I would say to you , please don't treat them any differently just be a friend and be understanding if they are not able to do all the things they used to do , It was so funny because we were out yesterday with my granddaughter m My arthritis was bad , ( i never say ) and she said " nanny you are walking like an old lady ,,are you OK ) I laughed because I am 65 next week but she doesn't See me as old bless her because I am young at heart , just be yourself my friend xx

well for me if they have a chronic illness and feel bad about it I won't make them feel that they have an illness. I will go out with them maybe not the usual stuffs because of illness but the our way of dealing with each other will always stay the same. If I will make them special it will just remind them that they are sick. I think the best to deal with it is to be more flexible with them but not to the point they will think you are just doing that for there disease but for there happiness.

One of my best friends mother has pancreatic cancer which just moved to her liver a few weeks ago. She starts hospic tomorrow. Our families have always been really close and I just call several times a month to see if there is anything they need done or I go and visit as much as I can. It's hard because my heart hurts but it's not like something I can fix =(

I am disabled with Multiple Sclerosis. My sisster is my best friend. She is always letting me know that she is there for me through thick and thin. Whether it be an email or a phone call, she lets me know with just a few words. It doesn't matter what the words are, just so they are consistant. It keeps me going.

Hi there ShawnsBidness, Welcome to myLot! Happy Easter to you and yours...Well, I don't have a friend who is chronically ill and I am not ill myself. But I would just want my friends and family to be there for me to talk to me and make me feel like the same person I was before the illness. I think that is the best that you can do, be there for your friend and understand that things in their lives have changed. Just be compassionate and be there...that is what I would do. Take care...

i used to have a chronic illness maybe still do Bipolar anyway, I can speak for myself in saying, just try to treat the person as a normal person, in spite of the illness or disability, respect them for who they are, don't dwell on the illness, but don't be afraid to discuss it either making TIME for them is a certain way to tell them that you value the friendship

Yes i do have friends with chronic illnesses. To me if you had a strong friendship from the start you need not worry about what to do. YOu just continue on with the friendship the same as you did before and treat you friend the same. They will appreciate that. If you start treating them different because they became ill it might make them feel badly. They might think you dont feel the same about them anymore because they are sick. you may have to add a little more compassion in there time of illness when needed but do not try to alter your friendship because of the illness just be understanding to them. I hope this helps you.

I do have friends with chronic illnesses and I've remained friends with most of them. I try to be supportive and just be a good listener without giving them unsolicited advice. It's hard enough being sick without having people tell you what to do. However, if they do ask my opinion about something I will tell them. I worked in a hospital so I had access to a lot of information and I was happy to help any way I could. I admire anyone who has a chronic illness and can still face the day with a good attitude and positive outlook. I think those are the people who have a better quality of life in the long run.

All you can do is just try to be there for them even when they don't need you or they are too tired to keep the plans you had. And to still love them for who they are.

actually that situation has neither arrived to me nor to my friends so i am just not knowing how to deal with that situation and we just don't now what to do

i think you might have a got a friend who is suffering from some chronic illness.i will tell you how i would deal.i am a follower of naturopathy and yoga and i have personally seen that all the diseases including cancer can be cured by yoga and naturopathy .if you have a friend i would advice you to say look ,i have visited websites on naturopathy and i have learned what is naturopathy .i have visited (you have to visit) naturopathy centres in our area .i want you to be healthy dont be disappointed ,dont seek sympathy from people ,instead stand on the feet and fight .god has created our body and he knwos to cure our diseases .a doctoor may be wrong but god (nature)cannot go wrong.you will get cured .i think your words should go like visit www.soilandhealth.org www.drbass.com in our area yoga expert ramdev is conducting breathing exercise camps all over india thousand attend these camps and are getting cured from heart diseases ,cancer ,arthritis and all other deadly diseases .and thousand are watch ing his programme on t.v and doing from thier home by simply watching this . details about him and his t.v progarammes are in the site www.divyayoga.com i would suggest to watch this website and suugest this to your friends. i heard he is coming to uk and us next

My mom has a chronic illness. It's not what you call life-threatening, but it is life-changing. She has a herniated disc that keeps on recurring no matter how much therapy she has. I'm always there to support her. The sad thing is she's the only breadwinner in our household. There are times that she can't walk on her own and she has to use me as a human cane. It always pains me when i hear her crying at night because she can't bear the pain. The only thing I can do is pray for her.