INFERTILITY - Anyone Experienced it?

I know how hard it is emotionally and physically. We had quite a roller coaster as i'm sure you and your husband have and are probably still experiencing. We too were hoping and praying that the AI would work because IVF was not an option for us, we just couldn't afford it. Are you stopping after 5 tried because of your choice or because of the dr's recommendations? I will keep you in my thoughts and hope all goes well. Please keep in informed, i'd love to help you out in any way I can.

I know how you feel. It's an enormous emotional roller coaster and it gets harder each and every month - especially if you have that per. feeling. I remember that when I started having cramps, or felt fatigued, or even as late as started spotting, I'd cry. Lots of times, i'd cry myself to sleep. My poor husband felt horrible because he didn't know how to comfort me. I mean he said all the 'it'll happen next month' or 'we'll have a baby soon', so on and so on. I LOVE my husband dearly, but he didn't understand what it was like for me. And i've found out that most dh are like mine. They feel the same disappointment and hurts and emotions as we do, but they don't quite understand ALL of it. All I can tell you is that you have to keep faithful to your faith and keep praying and asking God to bless you with children in your life. That's what got me thru the 7 years of emotional hell - excuse my language. Although, of course my dh support did wonderful to keep me going. I had many occasions where I was ready to say - Okay, i'm done trying. But he kept me going. Keep strong and faithful and NEVER stop asking for what you want, need and desire. Please let me know if I can answer any questions. Best of luck! Nica

Hello everyone! I'm a newbie here and I've been wanting to discuss our situation in forums like these. I'm 31 yrs. old and my husband and I have been married for almost 6 years without any luck of conceiving. We've tried some fertility medicines and work up with our dr for some time but nothing happened. Though my dr said that eveything in me is normal. Tests also proved that my hubby's sperm count, etc., are also normal...It got so frustrating because during our work up I really took time to take a leave of absence from work just to visit my dr for her required day, but each session was useless because I didn't get pregnant. So my husband and I decided to just wait for it to come... However, we've been waiting for years already and still nothing.. It gets really frustrating especially when I'm already having symptoms of getting my period again. Coz it just proves that we've failed again. This I felt each and every month I get my period...That's why I also know the feeling of anger / bitterness and sometimes I'm even envious when I see a woman carrying her baby or at the sight of a pregnant woman, wondering if I'll ever experience the feeling of being pregnant and giving birth to a baby...Sometimes I even shed a tear at the slightest thought of it..pls. help us get through this if you can...it would really mean a lot...thanks!

It is absolutely understandable that you want to have a child with your wife. I don't know why people are so heartless and mean. I personally think it'sbecause they have NO IDEA what it's like to go thru infertility. They take the act of conception for granted, and don't really value what they have, what they can do without any problems. I sincerely wish you and your wife the best of luck and will keep you in our thoughts. If all possible let me know how it goes.

Thank you for your comments. It's nice to not be yelled at for saying what's in my heart. It gets so frustrating when folks refuse to understand why we want a child together. I've heard the "God didn't mean for you to have kids." argument until it stabbed me in the heart. I've heard the "Maybe you two should go separate ways so you can find someone with which having a little one is easier." Nobody gets it.

cwriter- I know it's not quite the same and if you (or the others responding here) knew enough about me, you'd probably say I had no business responding to an infertility discussion BUT I know exactly what you mean about having a child together. When my s/o and I started dating he had 2 children and I had 3. As the relationship progressed into a permanent thing, the desire to have a child together became very strong. Most people disagreed and thought we had "more than enough already". Yes, 5 children is a lot and in ways it did seem selfish to want more but to US it felt like our family was missing someone...OUR child. I imagine that that is basically what you are feeling also and I hope things work out for you somehow.

Dh and I have been suffering from infertily from day 1. We love eachother and we support eachother and we even complete eachother, but there was still something missing. We got pregnant thru atificial insemination, far from perfect, but that's how we decided to proceed. I was very agry too. I was agry at the world, at everyone who never had to even 'try' to get pregnant. I was angry that I rescented pregnant mothers, newborn babies and even close friends for that matter. They didn't know what we were going thru. They couldn't even imagine it. I never like the whole 'you'll get pregnant when you stop trying or when you don't worry about' It just didn't feel right. dh and I look at our lo with grateful hearts,and with humble spirits. He wasn't made in the 'perfect' way, but he's here now with us and we value every single moment with him. I don't know how it feels to adopt, and I'm not going to tell you that you should be thankful for the twins you received. But I know that our little baby is worth every tear, every heartache every empty feeling we felt. We love him more than we can understand. So I hope you and your partner truly enjoy your babies, even if it's not the 'PERFECT' situation. lots of hugs.

WOW! that is a story with a great ending. I haven't experienced a miscarriage, so i don't know what it feels like to go thru that, but I do know that one of the best feelings in the world is seeing your baby for the first time after such hard emotional roller coasters we've encountered. Congratulations on your 1st baby boy and on your soon to be born baby boy. I guess that wether it be infertility or miscarriages, the pain is still the same and just as hard to deal with. Congratulations!!

Yeah, it makes you wonder how many woman out there are stopped from carrying their child full term because of something so silent

We were going to start adoption papers if the IUI's didn't work. We know IVF was out there, but it was too expensive for us. But we had to go thru two cycles of IUI before we got pregnant, and it wasn't too bad, especially after all that previous emotional turbulance

I am sincerely sorry to hear your story. I unfortunately don't have any suggestions; we DID refi the house in order to cover all of the expenses for the IUI. Although, my insurance covered about 90% of the cost. I hope it all works out and your dream of becoming a mommy comes true soon. You and your husband/partner will my in my prayers.