Official marriage or not?

personally i feel you should do whatever makes you happy, comfortable. i believe in marriage, but i am STILL married. my parents are STILL married. but it obviously doesn't work for some people. you also souldn't set yourself up for disaster. if you don't think it would work out, then you shouldn't go thru with it.

I don't approve or disapprove. I think it is up to each couple to decide how they want to go about it. For me getting married of just live together is exactly the same time from the emotional and personal viewpoint, but has some advantages over living together in legal terms. I don't think a signed paper has anything to do with the happiness and the harmony in any relationship although I understand that there are people that believe so. By the same token I don't believe that just because one avoids signing the paper it will be living happily ever after. Emotions and relationships don't guide themselves by papers or signatures. Some work, some don't and the paper has nothing to do with it. Again, for the sake of legal issues, that same paper might actually play a role and be important but the people involved are the ones who must decide what they want. Many people start by living together and get married after not because it will make their union more valid but just because they want to add the legal security for them and their children. I think that works well and that's actually what I would have done if my circumstances had been different.

I believe that you must have an official marriage for the legal protections that it grants not only for yourself and your spouse but for any children born of the union. If the marriage is bad and not worth saving, then get a divorce. Dissolving the marriage will not take any of the legal protections away from the children. If two consenting adults want to live as a married couple with out the official contract, then by all means, do it. My only concern is that once there are children involved, that little piece of paper carries huge weight in terms of legal matters for those children.

I believe in official marriages. I know a lot of people live together now a days, but I still feel like the committment of marriage is important.

I learned a lot of interesting facts while taking a Marriage and Families course. For one, couples who live together before getting married have the same divorce rate as couples who marry first. The commitment of marriage is a different step than living together. That said, I approve of any commitment to marriage, whether it involves a legal document or not. But I strongly feel that the couple should announce their commitment to their family and friends and introduce themselves as married or committed. I recommend taking the legal step because of legal issues (divorce, hospital visits, work benefits for families... etc).

i fully support an official marraige as for me marraige is not only for continuing the species but it is more as it totally briongs a girl in a new environment and if she is in probem always she can take the help of the law.

well legal is one discussion, there are certain rights a married person gets that the live in some does not. religion tells us that marriage is the only way to go at least in Judaism and christianity and it was culturally thought that people who gave that commitment to actually marry were more serious, as you we see it is not necessarily so because some of the most immature people are married and some of the most serious couples are not. if you love me you will marry is only as good as when you don't love me you will divorce me. so love can be insincere or very true in either situation. where do I stand? I think it is a personal decision based on all kinds of complicated details of personal lives. I know couples in both situations who are very happy and have made the right choices for them.

Well I think it depends a lot on your culture and religion. Here in the UK, only a minority of couples get married these days. Most people live together, and the majority of children are born out of wedlock. To me this is normal. I have lived with my partner totally happily for 20 years - the idea of getting married means nothing to me at all. Why should we go through some ceremony neither of us believe in, just to show something to others, when all that matters is our love for each other, and our commitment to ourselves? We are tied financially anyway, with a joint mortgage etc., so if we did split up, both of us would be in the same financial position whether married or not. So to me, I see no point in it at all, but, as I said, I do realise that in some countries and cultures people think very differently.

YES being legally married DOES MATTER. First, it provides you RIGHTS as a couple. Without marriage, if your spouse were to end up in the hospital, the hospital could keep you from visiting becuase you aren't family. If your spouse were to DIE, you would get NOTHING, as you are NOT the next of kin, since you are not legally married. marriages are a legal and FINANCIAL contract. Not very romantic, but there are rights by becoming legally married that you can't get without it. Why do you think homosexuals are fighting for these rights? There must be some merit to them. Things such as HEALTH care benefits - can't get them from your partner's employer unless you are married. There are a lot of reasons. I also think that "breaking up" is easy and people will do it after the smallest fights sometimes. But getting a DIVORCE is a big deal, and I think it helps people reealize that being married isn't supposed to be EASY all the time - and when you have disagreements, you need to try to work them out, instead of taking the easy option and running away. So yes, I think there is MERIT in a legal marriage!!

I have been married two times. Legally, it does make it easier regarding insurance and rights as a wife. Spiritually you are to show honor to your mate by committing fully in the eyes of God through marriage. In this day and age, that doesn't seem to be an issue anymore. Married people aren't the only ones who stay in relationships that are bad. There are many couples who live together who are just absolutely miserable but it is easier to live like that than to live alone. I don't think the paper changes many things, the divorce rate is sky high these days!

I don't believe that you are truly married unless you have the documents, being together isn't the same. I believe that marriage is what you make of it, its not a legal binding thing to me. I don't believe in common law marriages, I don't believe in undocumented marraiges. Its not a marriage unless you have the paper, sadly thats how society is today. However you can be just as happy not being married, but sometimes it calls for a marriage in some ways. Sometimes you need those extra benifits to get by, especially for important things.

Well, if your together for x amount of time its common law marriage anyway, at least thats how it works in my country (New Zealand), so you end up getting all the benefits of being married without actually being married. I myself am married, but I dont think its super important to be married if your together, I think its more social stigma. I know a lot of people back home who have been together 10 plus years, have children together and are now just getting married, mainly because it wasnt ever a high priority to them in the past.

I can see both sides of this issue. Legally, I want to be married because I don't want someone else stepping in to take everything away from either me or my partner if one of us were to pass away. But I have been married before and for a number of reasons it didn't work out. The divorce process was very hard on all of the people involved.