Spouse Bashers????

Oh lord don't get me started on people like that, I believe you could pull out a very long list of marriages and find about 60% if not more seem to bash their husbands for something or another. Not that it's wives fault but I do believe they need to talk to their lazy husbands and doing something about it rather than being lazy themselves and complaining about it when they can do something. Or they can rightfully put them "in the doghouse" and be surprised how unlazy they suddenly become.

I used to do "ladies night out" with 2 friends several years ago. I stopped because the nights were like bash-fests. THey both spent the entire time bashing their spouses. They always looked at me as if to say "well... give us the dirt on your guy." To which I always replied with something like "I've got no complaints, heck he finished giving me oral 5 minutes before you guys picked me up." It never failed to exasperate them. Eventually I started declining the invitations. It just wasn't fun to hear them blast their husbands, who I was also friends with.

hi Blackbay, it is very common and every where. This is just because of love and expectation. When we love some one we started expecting every thing from him. As per human nature every one wants that his partner should be the best one the world and have all sorts of ability. This over expectation will force them to compare their partner with other peoples , when they find others best they start bashing , As he is not upto thier expectation.every one has limitataion of ots own. if u expect evrey thing in one and could not get u will star bashing him.

Hi BlackBay, I know that many woman are doing it, as I have overheard such talks while working years ago. They make me feel sory for them, and for their husbands. If there is so much to criticize, one must do that to their husbands in the 1st place and not in public and colleagues. But guys do almost the same amongst themselves, and again I overheards certain talsk of guys too. Thei bashing is somewhat different though, and less heavy, kind off - they will be not able to stand when an other guy will agree with them. It's not good in any case, and this only means the marriages are not to be there 10 years down the road.

I do know many women like that and they seem to gather in groups, just as you said, to exchange stories of how terrible or stupid or incompetent their husbands are. Aside from the fact that you can't really respect someone if you talk about them like that, is the plain fact that you are publicly disrespecting them and teaching others to do the same. You are taking private details of your lives and exposing your husband to ridicule, and believe me, it doesn't make you look like a great wife. On the other hand, I know a couple of women who always seem so happy when they speak to their husbands on the phone, they really enjoy them even after years of marriage and those are the women I want to be. I think that I have a chance to be that way, because my husband and I are very well-matched and put respect for each other very high on our list of priorities for our relationship.

I don't have friends like that. But I have friends that have been with women like that. Sad part is, my friends are pretty outstanding people. I should know, I taught a good number of them ;p But in all seriousness, some of those women they use to be with were vultures. Others were pretenders. And yea it does seem like a trend to rip on the husband/boyfriend even if he is doing is very best and making a concentrated effort on the relationship. When (other men and) I see and hear about this it's disheartening and it does discourage one from entering a relationship.

i've been married with my hubby for almost 2 years now and i have to admit that i did say bad things about him a lot in the past... but as times goes by, it gets better... i hardly say bad things about him now and i am happy now... good on you for already being married for so long with your hubby and still so happy... take care n good luck...

I know what you ae saying. A male friend of mine and I were discussing that this afternoon. Someone made a "ball and chain" comment about his wife, and he kicked the man who said it out of his house. "Nobody talks about my wife like that!!" Good for him!! I was proud of my friend for defending his wife that way.

I know exactly the type and I hate to say this, but true story. That last friend I had like that, always downing her husband and wanting me to as well, ended up hitting on me! No kidding.

Yeah I'm guilty, But the way I look at it is that he should be doing something instead of nothing. I just get tired of it and want someone to talk to. And sometimes I need advice, from an outside party because the husband or the wife will have prejudices for one side or the other. So sorry if I offended anyone, or this is not what you wanted to hear, but that is just my opinion not that of the staff and management. Thank you for the topic.

first of all let me congratulate you on your happy marriage. I am very happy for you. I am not married myself but I do agree with you. It is an awful habit speaking badly about the people we love or should love..brothers, sisters, parents, boyfriends and husbands..Of course we are not supposed to be perfect neither our loved ones, but there is no need to say such things about people we know and love. I cannot understand why people behave like this. what happines is there in this? If there is really something wrong or we need to talk about our private enviroment..well it should done only among few and close friends and only to find comfort and a way to dealing with difficult situations.

I have friends like this. My neighbor, and my ex roommates are just like this, I don't have a spouse, so I have no room to bash. But this is one of the reasons I don't have a spouse, if I feel that after any amount of time that I have to bash my spouse bc they don't do what I feel or want them to do, I don't think it should be something that the whole community needs to be in on the discussion or what goes on in my house. But I have some sympathy for some of the bashers out there, I see exactly what they are talking about. I can sit at home for a week on vacation, and see what the people around my community actually do when I am at work, they do nothing... Nothing at all. So when they do come over bashing I always send them away with the response, "then you should say something.". I don't feel that it is my place to bash, but I do offer to be tactful for them and say sometihng. BlackBay- as for your situation, I am very happy that you have had 14 years of marriage and are still happy and can't bash. Congratulations, if we could all be so lucky.