Stay or leave

LEAVE HIM!!! No woman deserves that. She needs to realize she can do better and get out of there as fast as possible!

Tell her to run! Run fast, run quick, run soon, run now! The key word is run. Its not worth staying and its going to get her seriously hurt or even killed one day if she stays.

I was a domestic violence advocate for a little bit in my long line of careers. If your friend is even thinking about leaving, she needs to pack a bag for her and her kids if she has any, something that will contain enough stuff to sustain them for at least a couple of days, store it somewhere safe that he doesn't know about. I don't know the extent of the abuse, but if he does tell him she is leaving, the abuse could escalate. This is a very tough situation. She should call her local domestic violence hotline, if she wants to get out, they can provide her a way out and get her in contact with shelters or an advocate in her area that can help her personally. I had many women come into my office and I witnessed the after effects of both physical and mental and sometimes both at the same time and then some. These types of men always say they will change, offer them counseling, they may go for awhile, then after awhile it will go back to the same behavior unless he really is truthful, this is very infrequent. In most cases they don't change and they know this is just an easy way of keeping the person at home. Telling them what they want to hear, doing good for a few days and then when she least expects it, he comes back little by little until it is full force or worse. In any case, she should not stay with him because the hope of him changing is very unlikely. In any event, she needs to make a gameplan before embarking on leaving. Like I said I don't know the entire situation, how abusive he is, how volatile he is, how controlling he is over her. For the most part, getting a bag packed with a few things that she will need, meds, toothbrush/toothpaste, changes of clothing. Something light enough to carry quickly, and be able to hide discreetly or hide at a family members house or friends. Leave when he is least likely to suspect it. The less confrontation you have the better to get out. make sure you have a place to go before you leave, that's where the hotline comes in. You want a safe place so that he can't find you for at least a few days, so she can get her head on straight. This is tough, it is a hard road but she needs to stay strong. I hope she makes the right decision. My prayers go out to you.

She really should leave but theres nothing that you can do to get her to I have a friend who is going through the same thing and I have told her many times that she dosnt't deserve it and she is always saying that shes going to leave but never does. Theres a reason she is staying, its sad. All you can do is be there for your friend and pray that she realizes that it isn't worth it. Goodluck

When such a situation occurs, it is difficult to ask a person to stay. I will talk as a Christian because that is the only view point I see as true. It is said in the Bible that A husband shall leave his father and mother and be joined as one to the wife. That A wife shall be submissive to the husband and the husband shall love his wife. That the Man is the priest of the home and that all anointing comes through him to his family. That the family should be a man's first ministry, if he is not a good priest unto his family, God cannot bless him elsewhere. With these bible truths in mind, I will urge your friend to leave (not divorce) just separation and pray about it. As much as I believe God can change someone overnight, I do not advocate for her to stay and be hurt. If there are children involved, please shield them from the violent side of their father. Remember that honoring parents is a blessing on them and if they see this, they might learn to hate him and dishonor the most important channel for them to be blessed. Do not talk ill of their father and always hope that change is coming. Give him an ultimatum. Tell him that you are going away to give him time to sought himself out. You could also search for channels like counselors who would counsel him and if necessary, go with him to show your support. if you think such an ultimatum will not work without outside input like police or judge or your pastor, get that help and make him promise to reform before you are willing to join him as a wife and mother to his children. This is my woman to woman advise. You are a complete individual and I believe that regardless of the moooshy mooshy talk of 'my husband completes me', have a motto of 'my husband compliments me' this means that his actions and emotions towards you should improve you, not tear you down. I wish you all the best and God's blessings in getting your life back on track. God bless.

Leave him. Immediately. He is a habitrual liar.He knows he can not survive without her and thats why pretends he will change.This is a kind of emotional backmailing.Your friend falls prey to his acting . He is a hopeless case and your friend is nursing wrong hopes.

Promising to change will not work, the only way he is going to change is through professional counseling. If he is not willing, then she should leave before the abuse gets worse.

well get her husband to get counselling if not then she should start again somewhere

she should leave, He will never change they always say they will but never happens she should leave right away before it gets worst