Relationship and lies
By steerforth
@steerforth (1797)
Italy
October 17, 2007 5:44am CST
I would like to tell you something about my last relationship. I had a relationship for two years and six months ago the relationship broken. Three weeks ago I met a very sweet girl. We went out for a walk and she kissed me. I was very happy for this and we started a relationship, but this relationship broken last Saturday. In fact, when we went out, she told me a lot of things about her ex boyfriend. I asked her if she was with me only for forget him, but she said no. However, one day, when we went out for a little travel toghether, I saw her while she send messages from the cellphone to her ex boyfriend because he has some books of her. If she wanted to be with me could send the messages in another moment, I think. However, I have let her because I understood that if she wanted to be with me, she could send that messages in another moment without me and however she could not speak about him in each moment.
What do you think about this story? Do you think that relationship could be based on lies? Do you think that a story could break the passed love stories?
3 people like this
8 responses
@meme0907 (3481)
• United States
17 Oct 07
Hey sf,
Haven't heard from you in a while this girl must be keeping you busy |;P
I think she may still be holding on the her ex a bit but remember it takes a while to get over someone so try & be there for her & show her what a benefit it is to be w/ you |:)
+'s |:)
2 people like this
@steerforth (1797)
• Italy
17 Oct 07
Eheheh my dear MM, I was not here not only for her but for some works at the university, too. Thanks a lot for your reply :-) kisses.
2 people like this
@MH4444 (2161)
• United States
17 Oct 07
I don't know. It could be more than meets the eye. I dated a guy for a while that seemed to be geetting off on showing me how he was going to "do as he pleased"...right in front of me. I broke with him for doing the exact thing that happened to you. I asked a friend who is a psycologist; and he said that the guy was a narsicist. By definition they get off on being the center of attention. Loyalty is impossible with them, they are habitually unfaithful, and love the drama! Being a peaceful person I simply got sick of it and left him.
That's what my thing turned out to be based on repeatedly disrespecting my feelings in a showy display. the whole thing was about getting a reaction.
Hope you have a better future with one who has more respect for your feelings.
1 person likes this
@abi1005 (194)
• Philippines
17 Oct 07
maybe she isn't over him yet..maybe she is still in a denial stage. i hate to say this, but she might just be using you to get over her ex. but all of these are just my opinion. the best thing you could do right now is to talk to her. let her know how you feel. make her understand that YOU is the present and her ex must be a part of her PAST. if she is really in love with you, she'll understand. but if not, both of you should move on.
2 people like this
@steerforth (1797)
• Italy
17 Oct 07
Thanks :-) I have talked to her like you say, but she don't understand andfor this reason I have let her. Thank you!
2 people like this
@carol_m (709)
• Philippines
18 Oct 07
I could say your relationship was not made on a strong foundation...and I hate to say this but I guess she isn't over with her ex yet, she just pretend she is. I couldn't fathom what are her motives of sending text messages to her ex when she's with you. I mean, if she really wanted her ex and you at the same time, she wouldn't do such things that will make you suspiscious of her true feelings. In the same manner that she could have explained that text message to you if she really loves you. The only conclusion I could generate is that, she isn't serious with you, she isn't over her ex yet and she's just using you mainly to show to her ex that losing him didn't matter coz she now have you. But deep inside she still hopes for a reconcialiation on a failed relationship.
I suggest you two have a heart-to-heart talk to clarify and smoothen things out. Your relationship is at stake.
Good luck!
1 person likes this
@steerforth (1797)
• Italy
18 Oct 07
Thank you very much for your reply, I think you're right :-)
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10534)
• United States
18 Oct 07
She's not over the ex. Yes if you have one or a few it does come up in relationship talk, but it shouldn't be the center of what is going on. Worst yet, she's still trying to talk to the ex and right in front of you. She's definitely playing games. In addition, you might be a rebound she'll kick to the curb fast if she ever gets back with the ex (or finds some other fling to mess around with).
Watch yourself Steer.
1 person likes this
@steerforth (1797)
• Italy
19 Oct 07
I'll watch myself! Thanks for your answer :-)
1 person likes this
@Michelle3 (10)
• China
20 Oct 07
We all know that there is a white lie.
I admit that most people do not want others to tell a lie with us .But i think it depends on the situation .
1 person likes this
@Lydia1901 (16351)
• United States
12 Jan 08
I think she isn't over her boyfriend yet and she needs time to heal before being in a relationship with you. I think she should have waited for another time to send messages to this guy. Doing it while with you, shows a lot of disrespect to you in my opinion. Just hang in there, you will find a woman that will want to be with you and not let her past relationships come between you.
@lucky_witch (2707)
• Philippines
17 Oct 07
I believe that there are times that the people we love will hurt us for the reason that we cant understand. There are times that it happens. But we must always remember that there is no assurance that we wont get hurt. The best way is to talk about it. You two are the only one who could solve that problem. So just talk...
