Do People Really Care What Our Response Is?
By terilee79720
@terilee79720 (3621)
United States
December 29, 2007 3:55pm CST
I wonder sometimes if our opinion on things really matter all that much as we respond to certain discussions, or, are our words typed just another comment, half read or misinterpreted.
As I sit here typing my heart away to some of the most heart wrenching scenarios in another person's life or as I add my comment to the list of comical answers for a silly question, we here at mylots and other sites we leave our mark, ourselves, our opinions and deepest thoughts for as many people to read (and comment on) as the world wide web can hold.
Some people really take the time to read every response and leave comments and thank yous for those responses. Friendships are formed in some cases that will last a lifetime. Some only last until the next discussion.
Forest Gump said, "I'm not a smart man...but I know what love is".
Well, I, by no measure of anyone, can consider myself to know more than anyone else. That would be plain dumb. I was just wondering how many times our responses or comments have actually helped someone or been beneficial to their way of life.
I have received pretty interesting responses and comments that have changed my opinion on some things and a few discussions have changed my whole outlook on others.
Thanks to those who have made my life more interesting.
12 people like this
20 responses
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
30 Dec 07
I think it depends on the individuals involved and the level of seriousness of the discussion. I know I always read and consider each response to my own discussions, but I have sometimes left really serious responses to someone and wondered if they even read it. In one case, after spilling out a lot of my horrific life history, I actually left a comment asking the person to at least give me a cursory response since my post had been very hard for me to write.
I usually try to keep track of the people who actually seem to read and consider my responses. If I have a good discussion with someone, I try to keep an eye out for their responses to other people's discussions, as well as their own posts. I have a few friends that I've been known to stalk from discussion to discussion because I enjoy reading their responses so much. I have some mylot friends who have been with me for most of the time I have been here, some of which I have talked to via messengers, telephone, and even exchanged mail with. :)
2 people like this
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
30 Dec 07
Hmmm, that's an interesting example!
I think sometimes with my responses people chicken out from replying to them as well, especially when someone is being very annoying in their original post and I point it out. I'm always polite, but I'm also always honest about what I think, and I know a few mylotters that usually just skip my responses altogether. I rarely bother responding to them, but once in a while they have a discussion I can't resist, and then one of my friends will usually leave me a comment since I get skipped. :P
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I enjoyed reading your response lecanis, as it fit the same way I feel about some of the discussions I stalk.lol
It's always a pleasure to be involved in serious discussions and it's sometimes funny as all get out to be involved in the more comical side of life.
I'll be watching for your discussions as well as many others who have left responses here.
2 people like this
@lecanis (16647)
• Murfreesboro, Tennessee
30 Dec 07
*nods* I prefer being serious more often than funny it seems, but once in a while I just let loose. :P
It sounds like you and I look at things much the same way, so I'll keep an eye out for other discussions of yours as well! :)
2 people like this
@ItTakesAllSorts (4096)
•
30 Dec 07
I used to be on Mylot every day and I always enjoyed the discussions my friends put on which were funny and sometimes serious. Every discussion I put on I would respond to the comments as for me it is showing respect to aknowledge their input.
I did start to find alot of people were just putting on discussions without ever responding back, and for me, this is not why I am here. I do like the social side of Mylot and I have learnt alot of things since I have been here for the past year.
I suppose we get out of it what we put in and alot of people on here are very loyal when it comes to responding to discussions when you begin to build a relationship with them.
I have made some great friends on here and I will also respond to those who I don't know as this is a way of making new friends and sharing the same interests.
Thanks for such an interesting post!
2 people like this
@ItTakesAllSorts (4096)
•
30 Dec 07
I remember when I signed up on here, I knew I would meet all sorts, hence my name..lol
Thanks for your comments I couldn't agree more.
Happy New Year!!
1 person likes this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Yea - it really does take all sorts.
I've met some great people too and had some pretty interesting discussions about things I would probably not discussed with anyone else....
Fun, provocative, educational, and sometimes down right hilarious. It takes all sorts though.
I like to find responses and I try to comment on everyone. Not just some quick remark or comment, but honet dialogue. That's the educational part and meeting such a diverse group of people too.
What a hoot!
1 person likes this
@prasanta (1948)
• India
30 Dec 07
See, as far as I am concerned, I try to reply all the responses that I get except those which I find absolutely meaingless. However, I do not get opportunity to surf daily, so it takes long time often.
I have been influenced by many thoughts. I feel it is worth noting responses, I mean others views. That helps me looking at the issue with a different perspective altogether.
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Sometimes the meaningless ones can be interesting as well. I think we look for discussions that peek our interests too. Why would someone respond to something they had no interest in? Good question for another time?,,,
1 person likes this
@rosey3223 (1566)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I find that I post discussions for the reason that you stated. I want personal feedback, that is why I post a lot of discussions based on personal experiences. It's my way of finding out how others think, or to find out if I am the only one either feeling the way I do or what I am going through. The saddest part about that is that I don't get very many replies...especially if it is a topic that really does need help. On the other hand I have started a couple discussions about what I felt was nothing and got more replies than expected. But I value what is said, that is why I post it.
The only negative thing I can say about posting discussions from the heart like I do is that once I got into a real heated argument and the person went to my discussions and then used my personal agendas against me. I felt that it was highly uncalled for, but then again that is what I get for sharing my world with strangers.
But to answer your question on my behalf, yes, I do care what other's responses are otherwise I don't even think I'd be a member here.
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Thanks rosey, I understand what you are saying and agree whole heartedly. One discussion that is heartfelt and serious might not get many responses, while one that is just out there gets dozens.
Like was said earlier, it's a crapshoot. It's just nice we have a site like this one to express our thoughts. I think eveyone cares, to a degree.
1 person likes this
@arkaf61 (10881)
• Canada
30 Dec 07
I too have had times where a comment on a discussion or a discussion itself has helped me have a different perspective on something.
Personally I read all comments and try to respond to all, although I don't alway have the same computer time.
But I always try to :)
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Thanks arkaf61, I guess we all have had those times. I think always trying is one of the good points in anyone. Thanks for caring and leaving your response.
2 people like this
@sojournseeker (1244)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Right now reading your discussion, has me believing there is still hope in this crazy world for good solid communication, from the heart, that will keep us together as a nation. In our opinions, ideas, thoughts, written thoughts, and venues of humor we shape the world we live in and it is so great that those that learn are also teaching.
I care very much about the discussions I begin with either a question, statement, thought or strange idea and am tickled pink or blue in response coming from intuitives and creative expressionists, such as you.
To ask this querant shows concern for the written word, a powerful tool that will change things one great creator at a time . . . Here is to asking the great questions or posing the most challenging scenarios ! Here is to communicating from the heart.
sharing the light and happy holidays,
Miss Erica Hidvegi, the Enlightenment_Advisor, B.A. Psych/M.A. Transpersonal Studies- Cnslng/Author, Artist, Photographer, Entrepreneur & Freelance extraordinaire
http://www.authspot.com/writers/Enlightenedpsych2.964
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
My first thought to your response was "WOW"!
I love your words and the way you put them down. I so enjoy reading the written word and what people have to express. You're so on - when you say "In our opinions, ideas, thoughts, written thoughts and venues of humor we shape the world we live in. I love the part about teaching too. I think we are teachers in our own right.
I'm certainly going to visit your sight. Very soon. (As soon as I leave comment on the wonderful responses here).
1 person likes this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I followed the path that led me into your mind.
I took the road and watched it unwind,
into a maze of intilect, around blind curves and corners, into where your heart hides its wisdom, searching for keys that open doors to other people's minds, where they cast deep thoughts into pools, waiting to see what can be pulled out.
Hi soujournseeker. I visited the site and browsed through. Very interesting for me. Thank you for sending the address my way.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
31 Dec 07
I think one of the reasons I love MyLot so much is the interaction between people of so many diverse cultures, races and religions, yet despite those differences there quite often is the common denominator between us all, and that is we're all human, with the same fears, concerns, triumphs, and the just plain need to feel connected to others.
I think a lot of us might feel we're alone in our problems or health concerns, or whatever it is. Then we come here and realize how untrue that is. Some of the discussions I read that give slices of a person's life are really gut-wrenching, so sad and maybe I can't relate one-hundred percent in the person's life or turmoil that they might be going through, I might have an understanding in other ways.
One eye-opener in my life in general is that none of us breeze through life without problems. For many years I did indeed feel very alone in my "problem"--long story, but for many years I've been suffering with anxiety disorder with agoraphobia...I was once so bad I couldn't even leave my apartment at all, not even to go downstairs to get the mail. The how and why I developed this stupid condition, and yes it is stupid, remains a mystery to this day. That is what one friend though thought was so hysterical when she found out I had aspirations of going into the acting field and had studied and was a Drama major...in other words I used to perform on stage, with no problem--she like asked, how the heck did you get agoraphobic? I now know of course and understand the principles that in most cases one is causing the panic attacks themselves..Don't ask just how many years I've had this condition..way too many..it wasn't helped over the years that I had a lot of really bizarre and strange detours and set backs in life that hindered my getting over the condition sooner. No, I still have far to go, as I'm not quite ready to book a flight to Europe..LOL. But being the stubborn, determined person I am, I do plan to conquer this challenge.
For many years I never, ever told anyone about my problem, thinking they wouldn't understand and think I was ready to be in the looney bin or something. Then I started opening up and telling people...that's when I made the "discovery" how everyone has problems. Maybe one person would tell me..oh, yeah, my sister has that, or they tell me they're clinically depressed..one person even revealed she was bi-polar, and on and on. So the same here with MyLot. I have often poured out "where I'm at" and so many others could relate to my problem as well.
I like to think that maybe some of my discussions have helped people too, since I'm on SSI Disability still, I went through a hellish time back in May..my benefits were suddenly stopped..and me with only $5.71 to my name at the time. I made several discussions about this fiasco, asked for prayer support that somehow my situation would be resolved and like pronto! I had no money for rent, utilities, zip, zilch. Well, then some "inspiration" came to me. I was filling one form after another after another to get my benefits back. Some MyLotters of course recommended I get legal help. But I took it further, I got in contact with a local Congressman who in turn had a representative who dealt with disability issues..long story short, I got my benefits reinstated within a month's time...probably a Guinness Record considering I was dealing with Social Security, and probably much faster than if I had gone a legal route...I then in turn started a discussion about this as I knew many people here were also struggling to get benefits that were rightly due them...I basically told them to do what I did...get some Political representative intervention--so hopefully I helped someone in turn...Like to think so
Recently too, I had asked for prayers for my kitty, Pyewacket. He had developed an abscess and I just plain did have the funds to go to a vet. So yes people here prayed for my cat. I also relied on some of my time honored natural cures...one of which is a sage solution that I used as a compress...I have used sage solution as compresses for everything imaginable and swear it works...but with the combo of those prayers and my herbal knowledge the abscess broke...and he is happily on the mend. Now some MyLotters are asking me how to make and use that sage compress...LOL...one of my pet rescuer friends who also has a cat with an abscess asked for my "cure"
So yes, I think a place like MyLot reaches and touches us all. We can learn from discussions, but more important realize we're not alone in some of those struggles one goes through in life...isn't that a great feeling?? :)
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
31 Dec 07
I loved reading your response. You're right. The diveristy along with the common thread. There's something in that I think. Opposites but all the same? How interesting. And breezing through life without any problems? Not gonna happen. I continue to tell everyone, it's not the issues, it's how we handle them and it looks like you have a pretty good handle on things. Even when it looks like we don't, things take a turn for our benefit and usually work out to good. My mom always use to tell me, "It all comes out in the wash". I never appreciated that statement until I got much older.
Realizing we aren't alone is a thing I've found of positive benefit lately. When I do feel alone, I just come here.
How cool is that.
@zigzagbuddha (4601)
• United States
31 Dec 07
When I have put my heart and soul, and my sense of humor, into a response or comment, only to find myself ignored, or robotically thanked for my response, I can't help but feel a little sad, and for awhile I was feeling like maybe I was just wasting my time here.
I have changed my tune now though, and am enjoying the sense of being on a treasure hunt. The treasures are the kindred spirits that turn up every now and then, sparkling like the gems they are, made all the more valuable by their rarity.
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
2 Jan 08
Love the hunt........kindred spirits pop up when you least expect them, and for a dang good reason, although we don't always know what the reason is.
Such is life........some days are diamond, some days are gold, and some just stink to high heaven..
LOL
Ain't Life Grand ZigZag..............
@Sillychick (3275)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I don't comment on every response I receive. But I read them all. I appreciate that someone took the time to offer me a thoughtful answer to my question. I don't have the time to comment on every response, and I only do it if I have something specific to say. I never post 'thanks for responding.' I feel that is understood. We all help each other out by answering questions and sometimes we make friends. I don't mind if I don't get a comment on all of my responses, but I read them when I get them.
I too, have received some interesting insight from responses to my discussions as well as reading the responses in other discussions. I care, I just don't always specifically say so.
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Understood or not, thanks for your response. LOL.
We do all help each other in more ways than I can imagine, I'm sure. And the friends I've made are awesome. It's all been a pleasant Hoot for me and I love it - even when I don't get a response or comment. It's still total enjoyment for me.
1 person likes this
@lyn2008 (442)
• China
30 Dec 07
yeah,your question is so great.I'd like to discuss on it.At the beginning when I come here for money.But soon I found the mylot interest me not just because money.I've learn a lot from mylot.If mylot is fallen,I will be very sad just like I lost the most things of my life.When I get help from mylot,I really want to help the others,when we help each other,I feel so great.I don't know how to show me feelings for that.I really care of others and mylot,here I feel like at home.I can't feel even better.I really want to know a lot foreigner friends,when I heard that many people are very interested in China,I think that I really want to help they to understand our China,I think the maybe I can introduce China through my blog,I will start it soon,I wish all my mylot friends who interested in China can visit my blog.Now I am preparing for that now.But I am not very sure which kind of blog system should I choose,I want to get a free one at the beginning,and then if the visitors become larger,I will put my blog on the charge space.What do you think?Can you give me some suggestions,please?
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I agree lyn, It's not about the money so much as it is the opportunity to share, learn, and hopefully have something good to say that people enjoy reading. When you get your blog up and going please let us know. Sounds interesting. A free on to start, to get your feet wet will be good I think. There are a lot of good free ones out there. One of the things I learned about sites and blogs, you can usually find just what you need without having to pay an arm and leg for it.
1 person likes this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
T'anks xxkimimaruoxx.
I appreciate that. Heck I don't worry 'bout it. Just an intersting topic - Don't 'cha think?
1 person likes this
@xxkimimaruoxx (124)
•
30 Dec 07
I understand how you feel i haven't gotten any disscussion around lately but when i put something down it is another persons loss if they dont read it when i write something i do it to help me get a better view of it if i respond to someones discussion it is beacause i can see how and why a person would feel that way about a topic i cant say for everyone else but i read everything and interpret it to what i think the other person was trying to get at
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I agree. It can be as interesting or as casual as a person chooses it to be I guess. It's certainly interesting what other people's comments are. I enjoy reading them.
1 person likes this
@morphina (51)
• United States
30 Dec 07
When chatting, posting, or reading things on the internet I tend to take things with a grain of salt. There are plenty of people out there who read what you have to say, and most likely take it to heart, but never say anything. I know I have read stuff and enjoyed it but never responded. I know that many times I have come across things on a message board, and such that have helped me. I try to thank people for that, but a gal can only type so much in one day without her hand cramping up! jk anyhow I am glad to know there are others out there who do want to make a difference in others lives weather they know it or not. I aplaude and admire you for that.
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Thanks morphina. Sounds like you have a grasp on how I feel sometimes. Not all the time mind you, but for the majority of the time I'm on I would like to think I help more than hinder.
1 person likes this
@adforme (2114)
•
30 Dec 07
Hi Terilee79720,
I do not think that it is necessary for people to care; but it is always nice. I always hope the responses I get are sincere, but if they are not there really is not anything I can do about. I like having the chance to talk about things and getting the point of view of others. I make my own judgement calls on whether the responses are sincere or not. I hope you are enjoying expressing yourself; I am. When I find an interesting discussion, I respond; it is one of the ways that I engage with the mylot community. I think it is all about how you feel when you respond. A discussion is put out there and you say what you think and you don't have to be an "expert", you can just be you he he. Isn't that great.
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Your so right adforme. It's not necessary for anyone to care. I think that's one of the reasons why so many responses are made, and comments, because the internet puts us in a position sometimes that we can say whatever we want to, without caring too much. On the other hand, there are a few times when we really hope the person we respond to actually cares. Still, it's not up to us. It's up to the individual and what their reasons are for being here. Ain't life grand.......Thanks for your response.
1 person likes this
@frecklelip334 (1668)
• United States
30 Dec 07
hi honey. i have to say, if i start a discussion i try my hardest to reply to everyone's responses. i want the feedback, and that's why i post when i do. it helps to know someone may be able to give advice or share some of my same views! and i don't get much for responding to the responses pay wise, or in my number of posts (don't think it calculates those), but i don't care, i like people to know that i read what they took the time to write back in response to my rant, as a token of thanks for reading my rant, haha!! did that just make sense? LOL!
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
LOL It makes perfect sense frecklelip. I try to leave a response to everyone and/or a comment too. It's not about the money. It's not like we're ever gonna get rich or anything. The richness comes from having the ability to express our thoughts and have people respond. Some of us even become lifelong friends. What a hoot!
1 person likes this
@ctrymuziklvr (11057)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I have come to the conclusion that most don't care even when the discussion sounds like a serious one more often than not it seems like the writer doesn't care what anyone says. Sometimes I think I take the discussions too seriously and pour my heart out to the person and get no response back. I don't make new years resolutions but I have resolved that this year I won't do that any more. From now on a discussion is just what it is....a discussion (so the writer can make some money...lol)
2 people like this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Well, ctrymuziklvr, you can always come to see what's in my craw and respond to my discussions. Whether I'm serious or comical, or take things seriously or not, I'll at least tell you the truth. I hope you're not planning on getting rich here. I just like sharing.
1 person likes this
@theprogamer (10534)
• United States
13 Jan 08
I feel sometimes my responses aren't really cared for. I know there are plenty of variables to consider and plenty of ways in interpreting it. In terms of my responses and discussions, I've had some half-reads and several misinterpretations. Its been "great" being painted out as something I'm not, or having the opinion blown out of proportion.
In another form of interpretation I feel the responses aren't really cared for, and this is more of an usual way of thinking, if there aren't any responses then I feel like the response hasn't been read. I only feel like this for very particular discussions and responses, but the more effort being put in, the more validation I'd want to see.
1 person likes this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
13 Jan 08
I think it's all about interpretation theprogamer. It depends on what that person is expecting to find in a comment or response, even in the discussion.
I'm learning to pick and choose my words a little better - kinda like I'm explaining to a two year old sometimes. Still, there will always be people who don't get it, half read it, or don't read it at all.
It's like planting a seed - - - and we are the gardener.......???
@ileke4christ (62)
• Nigeria
30 Dec 07
For me, mylot is not all about earning money or get wealth but changing lifes and giving life a new meaning or hope. Your comments and ours have changed many people lifes and restored many broken homes, Keep it up
1 person likes this
@JoyceRenee (89)
• United States
30 Dec 07
Hi, I read every response to the discussions I post, but unfortunately, I don't always have the time to thank each individual that responded. I wish I could send a thank you to each of them. In the short time I've been on MyLot, I've gotten great advice and have enjoyed the discussions way more than I ever thought I would. Thanks for making my life more interesting. :)
1 person likes this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
And thank you too JoyceRenee. I hope you keep coming back for great discussions. It's nice that we can all get great advice.
2 people like this
@CanuckPrince (1052)
• Halifax, Nova Scotia
30 Dec 07
i cant say as i care about what people say in their response per say.. i read every response and rate it as it should be rated in relation to the topic and i try to respond to all people who respond to my posts.. i take it with a grain of sand though its just someones opinion.. and sometimes not even that.. plenty of people just put responses they think will get more attention etc as opposed to how they actually feel.. if people dont wanna take the time to check the responses thats fine though im sure plenty just post their discussions or posts on others discussions and never check back on them..
1 person likes this
@terilee79720 (3621)
• United States
30 Dec 07
I think I care. There are surely some responses that are evident some people don't. I guess it's true, I take most of them with a grain of salt too, but there are a few that end up better than other because you can tell they are really interested in what you have to say and they make a concerned effort to respond in like manner. I'm sure there are some that just post for the numbers, and that's okay. For me though, it's not about the numbers or the money. If it were, I don't think I'd be here.
Thanks CanuckPrince.
1 person likes this
@CanuckPrince (1052)
• Halifax, Nova Scotia
31 Dec 07
ya no doubt the numbers dont go up quick enough for that to be the reason to come here, and more people should definately care about what they say on here or offline really.. one of the major problems with the world is lack of care i guess..