HOW TO improve your life with a single step
@lordwarwizard (35747)
Singapore
March 16, 2008 12:08pm CST
An unexpected bonus to not being ultra-rich is that there aren't 1,001 parties to attend to every week of the year. I wouldn't need to arrange my schedule based on who I can't afford to offend and I basically have the freedom to pursue any activity I want.
Ever thought about things that way? Being rich is just one example. It is a good one because most people in the world want to be rich. We lament because we are not rich. The more enlightened ones among us learn to be contented with what they have. But how about taking this further? Instead of being merely contented, we think of reasons why NOT being rich is a plus.
Put any problem on the table and look at it from another perspective. Instead of viewing the problem as a problem, have a brainstorm and think of convincing reasons why this problem is actually a benefit, asset or advantage. Just by taking this simple step, your life might be changed for the better.
If it pleases you, do share with us one or more problems in your or someone's life and think aloud how you are going to put a twist and view them as your assets instead. Just to spark off your creativity, I am going to throw some problem examples below:
- Not owning a car
- Being short
- Being fat
- Late for work
- Forgot your purse
- Falling ill
- Thunderstorm
- A bird pooped on you
- Etc.
Have fun! =)
10 people like this
18 responses
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
16 Mar 08
I really had to think about this one!
My problem is that I can't find a job. I don't actually have to have one but if I want a decent retirement I should get one. People think I'm too old, I guess, at 53. So...the good things about not having a job?
I can make appointments for any time I like, I don't have to fit them to a work schedule. I can sleep late if I like and stay up late, too. My dogs don't get lonely. I can shop when the stores aren't crowded! I've reached new heights of frugality and gotten very creative with entertainment and replacing worn out or broken items I need. Not having a job means that I can spend more time making music, calling my family and children, watching the birds, I never run out of clean clothes because I haven't had time to wash and I don't have to rush through meals. If a neighbor has an emergency I'm always here to help and if their child misses the bus I'm here to get that child to school.
There! I never realized there were so many good points to my situation. Thanks for making my day better!
7 people like this
@callarse1 (4783)
• United States
17 Mar 08
Dragon54u, have you thought of a job agency to get you lined up with a job? Why not? It seems the best way, right?
Pablo
3 people like this
@dragon54u (31634)
• United States
17 Mar 08
Yes, I have. I'm registered with employment agencies and four temporary agencies. After an interview, they choose someone else. I'm not grossly overweight, disfigured or smelly. I speak well, dress well but not extravagantly and I test in the top levels of typing, English and grammar and problem solving.
I truly have no idea why nobody wants to hire me. I've asked, but nobody will give me an answer. I've asked my friends, my family, everyone. I have no idea why I can't get a job but I keep trying. I'd really like to have at least a subsistence income when I retire. Living in a box or the woods isn't appealing at that age!
4 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
Not bad! It's awesome not stuck in a job. 
As for why you can't get a job with the qualities you have listed, I think it is your age. Employers are biased against more senior people because they are not going to work for much longer. But the interesting thing to note is that it is the "young" ones that tend to leave the job before even 2 years is up.
Another reason is perhaps they perceive youth in the same league as drive, energy and enthusiasm. If you can pack these 3 and showcase them in the interview, I think the possibility of getting hired will be increased.
Just my take.
As for why you can't get a job with the qualities you have listed, I think it is your age. Employers are biased against more senior people because they are not going to work for much longer. But the interesting thing to note is that it is the "young" ones that tend to leave the job before even 2 years is up.
Another reason is perhaps they perceive youth in the same league as drive, energy and enthusiasm. If you can pack these 3 and showcase them in the interview, I think the possibility of getting hired will be increased.
Just my take.3 people like this
@paid2write (5201)
•
16 Mar 08
I am happy not owning a car so I can walk everywhere and keep fit and have more money to spend on other things.
I don't mind being short. I don't bang my head on low ceilings.
I don't mind being fat. It keeps me warm and I am cuddly.
I didn't mind being late for work, it made the day shorter.
I forgot my purse so I did not have to spend any money.
I fell ill and had a good rest and plenty of sleep.
I enjoy a good thunderstorm, it's exciting to see lightning in the sky.
A bird pooped on me - isn't that meant to be lucky?
5 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
Oh yes, a car is really heavy duty in many ways! 
Thanks for sharing possible ways of looking at those sample problems!
Thanks for sharing possible ways of looking at those sample problems! 2 people like this
@wy2008 (185)
• China
17 Mar 08
i envy your attitude to life , sometimes i worried about many things in my life ,my study , my family , my future ...many many things
maybe lost one thing does not mean you are unlucky , may be you will get more later , so keep smile everyday will make us be more confident about ourselves!
3 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
As the saying goes, "Thought becomes things".
2 people like this
@NewbieHelper (308)
• Canada
16 Mar 08
Hello lordwarwizard,
Great exercise you're asking us to do.
I was late for classes one day and found out that I just missed an accident by being 1 busride late!
Thunderstorms don't have negative connotations for me. I like Thunderstorms, actually, because I love the air afterward. The air is different and energizing, literally, after thunderstorms. I feel badly for people who are frightened of these natural events, but am glad that I'm not, so that I can enjoy their after-effects!
4 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
Wow that is real lucky! A blessing in disguise! 
2 people like this
@callarse1 (4783)
• United States
17 Mar 08
Hello Lordwizard, you asked us to look at our problems a little further. I would like to comment about being rich which you stated as your problem:
Being rich doesn't bring friends, and in fact it can be your downfall. Many people don't know what to do with all the money so they go buying like crazy. They think they are someone, and when there money runs out where are they? In fact, money doesn't buy happiness and many rich people are sad, and have problems like you and I. I'm not rich because of various reasons. Would I like to be rich? Yes, why not? I would donate a lot of the money, and buy some nice things for people I know could use it.
You asked about what problems I have, well first is that I don't have a car. Unfortunately I don't want to get a loan because I'm already paying off one loan. I am saving money and I will eventually pay for the car in cash. I feel blessed because there are other problems that are worse than mine. In fact I am glad that God gives my life to live each day. God Bless
Pablo
4 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
Indeed, having money is nice but if the unexpected happens and you lose the money, you are nothing if you can't make it back.
3 people like this
@leeesa (884)
• United States
19 Mar 08
My problem is that I'm alone. When I start to get down because of it, I turn it around by thinking about how I don't have to clean up after another person, I can sleep as late as I want on the weekends, I can always go anywhere or do anything I want without having to compromise with someone else, I always get to pick out the movie...it makes me feel better and sometimes to the point that I DON'T want to be tied to someone else!
It really works. This is a great idea to apply to other downers too!
3 people like this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
21 Mar 08
Hurray for being alone My son just teasing I think one day asked me if I had ever thought of getting married again.Isurprised myself when I said now way been there and done that, now I can go wherever I want no questions asked and no one to stop me, I can do what I want when I want and this is really rather exciting.
1 person likes this
@pumpkinjam (8763)
• United Kingdom
19 Mar 08
This is a great idea Wizard. I personally am not too fussed about being rich but having a little extra now and then would be nice!
I can't think of anything else right now so I'll use some of your suggestions! Not owning a car - well, of course that means less bills to pay, no worries about it getting stolen, always being able to have a drink when I go out.
Thunderstorm - what is bad about a thunderstorm? I love them! IF you're supposed to be going to work, you can use it as a reason not to. Rain on the windows is really relaxing and if there is any weather damage, you can claim on insurance and improve whatever it was that got damaged.
Forgot your purse - well, that would mean not being able to spend money so you would possibly find something new to do and you could save whatever was in your purse for a rainy day.
Being short - well, I am short and it's a bit of a pain but I don't have to duck underneath things.
Falling ill would mean not having to go to work, having someone wait on you (if you go to hospital or have someone good at home!)
But sorry, I can't think of anything good about being pooped on by a bird or being fat!
2 people like this
@pumpkinjam (8763)
• United Kingdom
20 Mar 08
I have plenty of problems Wizard but this discussion has helped me on my "posidrive". I've been thinking about how everything is good. I had a job interview last week which was good. I didn't get the job but I got interview experience and while I've not got a "proper" job, I have more time to spend with my children whom I can also take with me while out on my current job. I've won a total of £15 on the lotto in the past two weeks. It's not much and has made not a jot of difference but it is a profit all the same and it proves that I am not as unlucky as I previously thought!
I've even thought of positive things about my partner who spends all of his spare time ignoring me and the kids. He pays the rent!
2 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
21 Mar 08
Great, GREAT! Continue to think positively!! 
2 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
20 Mar 08
It sounds like you have no or insignificant problems. This is good. I am happy for you!
2 people like this
@mansha (6298)
• India
20 Mar 08
I am still trying to find out the one good reason, I am here in this paradise except that I am loosing on the time, I could have spent on looking for a job. Initially I had thought okay may eb in a small place like this it will be easier to find a suitable job but that didn't happen.No d find few reasons why I am here, with net going out almost everyday , my earning coming down from 30$ a month to 8$ over here. Except for the bad weather and me catching up on all the TV programs , and munching over the snacks hile stuck up in this single room due to bad weather I really fail to see the sunny side of my situation.
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
21 Mar 08
THINK my friend. Think hard enough and conceive a path out for yourself. 
2 people like this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
21 Mar 08
okay a sunny side pointer you said the weather is bad so be glad that the roof does not leak now take it from there. also you said something about a light at the end of the tunnel so you are starting to think positive now imagine stepping out of the tunnel into that light.
1 person likes this
@ladyluna (7004)
• United States
17 Mar 08
Greetings oh wizardly one,
Great exercise of perspective!!!
It's time for personal introspection, eh? Well, interestingly enough, often times our strengths and weaknesses are one in the same -- depending on perspective and particulars. So, one of the more often leveled criticisms of me is that I am too serious. This external perspective is the result of folks knowing that I tend to get riled up, when I learn about gross miscarriages of justice -- be it corruption, bullying, etc.
The inverted perspective is that I'm thrilled that I get all worked up over these kinds of situations. The alternative might find me with a heart of stone, where I do not care about others. Or, too self-aborbed or cognitively challenged to be willing or able to stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves.
I'd say that its all about balance. Surely, those folks who find me too serious would not think as they do if they saw how easily I embrace goofiness, and light-hearted fun. Anyway, if being accused of being too serious is the price to pay for caring about my neighbor, then that's OK. I can think of worse to be saddled with.
As an aside: I'm looking forward to reading the responses to this discussion. This is such a terrific exercise of thought. Nicely done!
2 people like this
@ladyluna (7004)
• United States
18 Mar 08
You're right, Wizzy! It is difficult. It takes consciousness and commitment. Though, I think that the benefits are fairly obvious.
I particularly likr the example in your original post. There are generally silver linings in those dark, storm clouds, eh?
2 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
18 Mar 08
Yea, many times it is just the way we choose to look at things. But of course, this whole thing about looking from the "right" perspective is not as easy as it sounds.
2 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
20 Mar 08
Just like there are 2 sides to every coin.
1 person likes this
@VAnnasamy (426)
• India
17 Mar 08
Fortunately, I have no problem as on date (believe me). I am thankful to the Almighty for making me content.
Only one worry is that 'my responses are not being marked as 'BR' LOL.
Excelling the excellence.
@byfaithonly (10698)
• United States
17 Mar 08
Hey I got this one covered - If your not getting BRs then you don't have to feel quilty if you don't return the favor :)
NOT complaining just I always forget to check that and not sure what to do next - thank them, give them one, feel like an idiot for not giving a better response.
3 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
Geez Faith, we shouldn't treat BRs like favors! Well, not entirely. 
2 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
So you have a "problem" there.
Do share: Why is it a good thing your responses are not given the BR?
2 people like this
@byfaithonly (10698)
• United States
17 Mar 08
I would say a stupid 'problem' I'm dealing with these days is 'age' - I tend to get this way each year as it gets closer to closing another year in my life and starting another - yet another year older :(
A good twist - I have something to blame my airheadedness on - old age, the mind goes :)
@byfaithonly (10698)
• United States
17 Mar 08
Yep better things to come - I can't cook or clean house because my febble body can't manage, hummm guess someone will have to take care of me :)
2 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
I understand Faith. Closer and closer... it could be something even better beyond. Who knows?
1 person likes this
@whyaskq (7523)
• Singapore
18 Mar 08
All it takes is the call for one to think positively despite all odds. How much easier it is to say. Let's have your last example for some fun.
A little bird fly high up in the sky. You are fascinated by it. You look up, follow it and poooopsss... it drops directly onto your face. Your lips curled. 
You don't mind. You don't cry. You just thank god that elephants don't fly.
You don't mind. You don't cry. You just thank god that elephants don't fly. 
@goodhappens (671)
• United States
17 Mar 08
Hello Lordwarwizzard, This is good, and I agree it is all in how we look at things as to the quality of our life, I have friends and family that situations will occure and they ask me, so where is the good out this that you always say is there, I usually come up w/ something that gives them a hummm, yeah attitude.
As far as your list
I'm short and it is easier to fit in small places and under my mans arms
Forgot my purse: then I really didnt need to spend anything at that time
Falling ill: it is God's way of saying slow down, rest and take care of yourself
A bird pooping on you: hey I have been told that is good luck, so expect a great day if that happens.
The roof on my shop leaking: hey its a rainy day and I really just want to go home and read a book on the couch, so looks like I can do that now, may even catch up on some laundry
I totally agree it all depends on how we look at things great exercise, thank you :)
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
18 Mar 08
You sound like a really positive person. Kudos to that!
2 people like this
@wickedangel (1636)
• Dominican Republic
17 Mar 08
Wow Lordwarwizard you sure know how to make us all sit up and think a little! It is only 5am and my brain is groaning. Couldn't get on the computer yesterday and as the MIL is coming later today I doubt I'll get on it much in the next two weeks. So I'm getting my fix now!
One positive thing about not being rich is not having to worry about who your friends are - are they there just because of your money, probably!
I love thunderstorms, the energy, the lightning displays, the high winds screeking around you - I could go on and on, but won't!
Not owning a car - we don't have one here, so we walk everywhere or take public transport and when we need to do a big shop we go with our neighbours. Helping out the environment a little bit!!!
3 people like this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
17 Mar 08
I agree. The richer you are, the more paranoid you might become. You just can't be sure if someone wants to be with you for the money or what.
2 people like this
@Little_Stormy (6883)
• United States
21 Mar 08
I know this will shock you.. but I LOVE storms! LOL!
I have to do this on a daily basis, so I have became a pro at looking for the good things in a sucky situation! lol!
I'm not upset at being tall (much! lol) because I can get stuff out of my own cabinets and reach things on the highest shelves.. all on my own! lol!
I'm glad I'm not rich (seriously) because I think it would be hard to find who your real friends are.
I'm glad I'm not super smart because I have found that the smarter people become the more foolish they are as well.
I'm glad I make mistakes because I wouldn't have grown into the person that I am had it not been for those mistakes.
I could go on forever! lol! but those will do for now :)
awesome discussion!
1 person likes this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
22 Mar 08
Keep rolling. Think of how you can apply it in your life.
@duranv (516)
• Honduras
21 Mar 08
I don't have a car, but that doesn't bother me, I can't drive. Some other problems I have, I'm 46 and I'm bald (started balding when I was around 26) and now the little hair I have is turning gray, you know like adding salt to a wound, but that doesn't really bother me, what does bother me is I'm starting to get a pot belly, and I know if I exercise I can control it, but I just don't seem to have the will power to keep an exercise routine, I start and after a few days I just quit. And getting fat is definitely not good for your health, I'm starting to have trouble bending, and I'm only weighing in at 200 lbs, I'm about 5"9" so in reality I'm just about 20-25 lbs overweight, but if I don't watch it I could end up losing control. Most of the exercise I do is walk, so not having a car in my case is in reality possitive.
1 person likes this
@lordwarwizard (35747)
• Singapore
22 Mar 08
If you don't like it, exert more will. I know it's not easy...
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
21 Mar 08
Well I luckily haven't had a bird poop on me but I have had a problem of accepting retirement but looking at it from a different view I can sleep late, no boss to have to listen to, I can go for a walk and listen to the birds singing, I can work on my novel, I can take the bus and go to Larwin Square and just goof off, I can take my time in fixing my lunch and even learn a new recipe. wow I really did not realize I am not so bad off after all looking at this from a different slant.thanks
1 person likes this
@amla_tijani (18)
• Malaysia
17 Mar 08
Life doesnt had to be that hard. I guess few know this. WE, or like most other would think, still need to fight and struggle. Perhaps not so. Just let life unfolds itself. Stay focus on what we want, a single step at a time if not zooming like an F1 Ferrari or just a slow yet confident snail pace (!!) do wat is before us to make it happen, in the mean time, trust the whole process... a single step at a time. Besides, if regard running a marathon is excruciating
2 people like this
