Do you take care of your language while posting responses?
By dpk262006
@dpk262006 (58676)
Delhi, India
April 24, 2008 12:14am CST
Dear friends, do you mind your language while posting your replies or just do not bother about the standard of your language? In one of my recent discussions, I found that some of the members wrote utterly repulsive, derogatory, insulting, intimidated, threatening and highly objectionable language. I felt very bad after going through their responses. My discussion was a simple one and it had no controversial element. My point is that if any of the members does not like to respond to my discussion, it is his/her sweet will, but posting a reply in an insulting language, really hurts.
I myself do not use any kind of offensive or derogatory language under any circumstances in my posts, comments or counter-comments and expects the same from others.
Do you also receive responses which are bad in taste or wherein offending words and/or bad language is used? If at all, somebody writes insulting language to you while replying to your posts, how do you react?
Please share your experiences and views. Thanks in advance.
21 people like this
78 responses
@julyteen (13252)
• Davao, Philippines
29 Apr 08
yeah i offended many times. But i didn't react instead clarify my points. the main root of this sometimes they misinterpret you post. if ever they still reason out the way they post. i leave the discussions and no comments anymore. to avoid unnecessary arguments.
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
2 May 08
You follow the correct approach when you do not enter into arguments.
1 person likes this
@SViswan (12051)
• India
24 Apr 08
I've seen the kind of response you mentioned.
I do not do it myself....sometimes I am misunderstood because I have not worded it well enough...but never rude.
I am very careful when I speak in real too (except with my husband...lol)...so it comes naturally to me.
I've never got such responses in any of my discussions.
1 person likes this
@SViswan (12051)
• India
24 Apr 08
Deepak, if anyone's used such language on you, ignore them....they show what their manners are and it shouldn't affect you.
Some people do not know how to voice a different opinion without being rude...please don't let that stop you.
You've always been nice and pleasant...and no one who knows you will think you are rude...and will use such language.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
That was the irony, the very people who are not aware about me, wrote nasty things, which pinched me a lot. When somebody does not know me, he/she has no business to redicule me. Thanks for your kind words and support. I am really feeling relieved.
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
Thanks dear for your quick advice and response. I know you are alwyas polite and decent in your posts.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
4 Mar 09
Hi! Riya!
Yes, we just cannot do anything about those, who choose to be rude and nasty and who post irrelevant responses to discussions.
I agree most of our friends are very very nice and courteous and they never write silly things.
Thanks for joining a very old discussion of mine.
dpk
Hope you are better now.
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
24 Apr 08
Deepak,
I know what you mean. And it feels awful! I mean, who likes inviting gross things! I do not generally use any offensive terms. It's not that I deliberately make sure to phrase my words coated with sugar. I am like that practically as well. I would not use any slang or colloquial things even when with close buddies. And most of my friends are less offensive with their words and ppl who are rude and not congenial are just not my friends.
Having said this, ppl who use derogatory comments many times do not know that they are being rude. And culture difference is there always. we have to take these things into account. What displease me need not necessarily be unpleasant to some other!
Deepak, just relax and do not go too much into it. It hurts but still these ppl are not worth wasting time.
Be happy and take care.
1 person likes this
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
24 Apr 08
Yes, you are right! And I am sure you will overcome this just as we all do. And yes, such ppl are rude in real life as well. But, it takes so little to be polite and decent!
You take care and smile now..
pls smile..
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
When dear friends like are there to support me in my thick and thin.....there is no reasons not to 'smile' again. Thanks for your kind and soothing words and that kind words throw a significant light on your nature and image that how 'nice' you are.
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
Thanks dear for your prompt advice and response. You say that you are same in your approach as you are in your practical life. I know that and this is exactly what I thought about those fellows, who used disgraceful language, there is every likelihood, that they may not be polite even in their real life. Whatever we write here reflects our real image alo.
I agree with you that those 'nice' people are not worth wasting our time.
@BUSSY1979 (1283)
• United States
24 Apr 08
i've not had no repulsive responses like that before. but, i know that someday i will in time probably. i hate it when they do that, and wish that they would leave this site if they are going to cause so much trouble here on mylot. i also would report them to the Mylot staff and to let them know who is doing the bad deeds on the site. it's sad that people cannot
behave without getting themselves into trouble by cursing, or being mean to other people. they should not be allowed on the site here to earn the money. for that matter, they don't even deserve the money.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
Thanks dear for your quick advice and response. I fully agree that these kind of person should not come on the site. I am really relieved to read your response.
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
Yes, I quite agree with you, that those people would lose many things in their real life too.
Deepak
@BUSSY1979 (1283)
• United States
24 Apr 08
hello dpk,
i know. people like that, and with that kind of personality don't deserve to earn money here. they need to loose everything good that comes into their lives!
1 person likes this
@aisaellis22 (6445)
• United States
4 Mar 09
Hello deepak! I also tried to watch my language so that I won't offend anyone here. But it seems like there are really natural rude people here who are trying to pull us down and don't care whether they hurt somebody or not. I have met many people here saying some bad words but what I did is just try to ignore those people because I won't go beyond their level..hehehe..
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
4 Mar 09
I must say - Hats off to your respected parents. They taught you very good lessons of life and I am sure you will go a long way in your life because you know how to be nice and kind to others. It is a great quality.
(Our parents also taught us in this manner and advised us not to be rude or nasty to anyone).
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
4 Mar 09
Hello! Aisa!
I know it very well that you always use very sensible and sweet language, in your responses and comments and you take due care about it. You appear very nice and courteous. You see, when we read some soft and kind words, we always feel glad to see those lovely looking words, the good words make an impact not only on the writer but to the reader also and it generates a kind of goodwill.
Yes, I agree with you that there are some members who nonchalantly use rude language and do not bother about the sentiments of others. I do not use unhealthy language ever in my posts, I try to be extra careful while drafting my response/comments, as far as language is concerned. I do not want to offend or hurt anybody. Like you, I also ignore, if someone write nasty comments. In two of my recent discussions, I had had the experience of some not so generous or courteous responses (I really felt bad to read those responses, but did not react much).
Thanks for reactivating such an old discussion.
You appear very nice and courteous and if you put yourself in other's shows, you can view the position rightly. If you apply this method in your real life too, I am hopeful, you will go a long way. Thanks for sparing your invaluable time and participation.
1 person likes this
@aisaellis22 (6445)
• United States
4 Mar 09
my parents just raised us to be a good person deepak and be considerate towards others..God will be sad if we are rude too...
I might look at your recent discussion and see who are those people..hehehe..
1 person likes this
@Pigglies (9329)
• United States
5 Sep 08
I try not to use any offensive language in my posts because I don't think swearing and insulting people really does much to help make a point. I find people who resort to such language in debates to be very childish and not worth debating with.
1 person likes this
@lkbooi (16070)
• Malaysia
27 Apr 08
Hi there, I totally agree with you that one really couldn't tolerate and has got hurt if anyone who posting a reply in an insulting language. So I always try to take great care of my language not to use any offensive or rude language that could make someone to feel uneasy or agitated, while replying any responses. So far I haven't come across any and I believe all my friends here are nice and helpful people. Happy posting and good luck.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
2 May 08
I know you are very nice and polite in your words and it always feels great to read your posts.
1 person likes this
@fec139 (810)
• United States
27 Apr 08
Some people think that just because it's the internet you can be rude and sloppy. I have always had enough pride and respect for myself that no matter what I write-- an email, an IM, a phone message-- whatever, I am respectful, articulate, accurate, and polite. Something people have to know: a piece of paper can be discarded, but what you put in cyberspace stays in cyberspace, and can be retrieved at any time. Just ask any beauty queen who has had to give up her crown because of a racy video she did ten years ago, or any politician who has had his/her campaign smeared by something on the internet for 20 years and dredged up by an opponent. If you don't want something to come back to haunt you, don't put it on the internet!
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
2 May 08
I am really impressed with your wonderful and fanstastic thoughts. You appear to me very wise and you know how to maintain relationship. I quite agree with your views that what is put here on internet, is kind of record, and if one has put up something 'wrong', it may haunt him/her.
@apsara60 (6610)
• Israel
24 Apr 08
hi deepak,
I think it is from the kind of language that is used that we can judge the character of a writer. For me a person who will use vulgar language can get all the hatred that I have in me.......people who use offensive language and hurt people, comes in the category of ignorance....I prefer to ignore them.
It does not matter if your English is weak and you make spelling mistakes or grammatical errors, as long as your language is neat and not hurting anybody.
I always use simple decent language and I am always careful to see that I don't hurt anybody. I may joke with some of my close friends because I know they understand me and will not take it as insult. I think your language and how you express yourself is very important as it decides your public character and on this depends how society will accept you.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
I fully agree the way we write reflects major part of our character and image. Thanks very much for your kind words and unflinching support. Yes, I fully agree with your views that to 'ignore' such persons is the best way out. I know you are always very very 'polite' and 'decent' and this makes you favourite of many friends. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts.
@wondericequeen (7876)
• Hong Kong
4 Mar 09
I would. At the very least, I would be more polite and tune my tone softer, since I don't want to upset others around here. And it's good to be polite anyway.
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
4 Mar 09
Your response reveals that how caring and nice you are and you cannot hurt anyone here. We should write some decent and acceptable language so that others may not feel hurt. Yes, due to cultural back grounds, sometimes some responses look very odd, however, we should take those in our stride. Thanks for enriching the post.
@I_LUV_U (2519)
• India
24 Apr 08
Yea, I am self-conscious while posting on myLot. Since this is a form of 2-way (back and forth) communication too, I don't want people to misunderstand me and spoil my day for something I didn't commit. I'm glad that I have learnt from my past mistakes and deal with people more carefully.
I just ignore to the best of my ability when somebody throws in an insulting remark at me. It does no good to gather upon negative energy for fuming and flaring purposes about someone. On the contrary, it loses out your stability of mind, increases blood pressure and lapses your concentration, thereby disturbing your quality of work.
So, prevention is better than cure. Keep them at a distance.
1 person likes this
@cupid74 (11388)
• Pakistan
24 Apr 08
Hi Dear Deepak
really sorry hear to know all this, but dont feel bad, all kind of people are every where, just ignore them
Well i try to use lanuage properly and try not to hurt any ones feeling ( i am not sure about grammer or spelling as i type fast what i have in mind and post it and for that my teachers at mylot point it out and some times scold me too, bit ----)
It rarely happen to me but if it did i politely try to close it, i dont want to rude as other person
Take care
Wish u all the best
and hey, keep smiling, dont take tensions of such person
byee
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
Thanks dear for your quick advice and response. I agree with your suggestions and will act accordingly. I am really pleased to read your response.
@naseefu (1607)
• India
3 May 08
I am using good language only.I had such an experience as you said.But i did not give much care to it.Just leave it.That is what we have to do.
We can see many discussion there some people attacking together!.I dont know why they behave like this.Thanks
@secretbear (19448)
• Philippines
10 May 08
hi dpk!
i'm always careful with my words when i'm making a comment or a discussion. unless i'm so angry that i can't help it but use bad words. but still, i don't use bad words to offend anyone here at myLot. i remember when i made a discussion about my number one office enemy. i had to call her a lot of names to relieve my anger. but i used special characters when writing those awful names like b!+ch. and since the name is for her, i don't think anyone here was offended.
anyway, generally i'm really careful of what i write. sometimes if i want to be sarcastic, i put it subtly. as much as possible i don't want to offend anyone here at myLot. and as much as possible, if i detect a "bad tone" in someone's response, i would try to ignore it and respond very calmly since i might just be misunderstanding it. at times i answer back sarcastically but still, there's a mild tone in it.
@Rozie37 (15499)
• Turkmenistan
24 Apr 08
I give them a minus and report them. This is the best way of fighting back. I am sorry that this has happen to you. People say that words don't hurt, but that is a lie. I have seen on some discussions where they have actually deleted a response. Hopefully they will do this for you, so your discussion will not be messed up by someone else's rudeness.
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
Thanks dear for your quick advice and response. I agree with your suggestions and act accordingly. I am really relieved to read your response.
@faith210 (11224)
• Philippines
24 Apr 08
Hi deepak! I am really sorry to know that you have received those kind of remarks. I, too have experience and receive some. I just try to ignore it and not react to it anymore to avoid a possible argument. Just like you, I think about my responses/comments because I don't want people to feel that I am insulting/criticizing/offending them in any way. I want my discussions to be free from derogatory remarks. i treat others with respect and I am hoping i will also be accorded the same. Just my thoughts dear friend! Take care and have a nice day!
1 person likes this
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
Thanks dear for your quick advice and response. I agree with your suggestions and will act accordingly. I know that you are very polite and nice. I am really pleased to read your response.
1 person likes this
@season0907 (671)
• India
24 Apr 08
Hi dkp262006,
Please take note that there will be always few people everywhere who use insulting language and mylot is not exception to that. What we have to do is to simply ignore those type of responses. If you find somebody like that in your friends list, you can remove them.But don't get upset with responses with insulting language, because if you upset, you may not be able to work energitically.Keep your self unperturbed by those type of responses and keep going.
Good Luck.
@dpk262006 (58676)
• Delhi, India
24 Apr 08
Thanks dear for your quick advice and response. I agree with your suggestions and will act accordingly. I am really pleased to read your response.
Deepak
@LoreleySUX (4)
• Australia
24 Apr 08
it often happens in the forum, acutually, majority of us wanna share positive information through forum, so if u received some replies which are not good, just put them away:)
1 person likes this